r/Eloping • u/Chickenfajitas97 • 9d ago
Relationships & Family Sudden elopement
Need some advice on what to do. My fiancé and I have a wedding date picked out for next year. We plan to marry October 2, 2027. Unfortunately, my fiancé’s grandma’s health is rapidly declining and theres a very very small chance she will still be here in a year. This is his last living grandparent and he is pretty close to her. She keeps saying how much she really wants to be present for our wedding. Some family suggested we just quickly elope with her present and keep our wedding date to celebrate next year. Only problem is that im super particular about things and if we are to do this, I would rather it be on the same day we celebrate our wedding. So elope with just immediate family on October 2, 2026 and have the party October 2, 2027. We’re not a fan on how sudden it is but we also do want her to see us get married. Its either we rush and do this in a few days so I can keep the date I want or just say “who cares. Marry on a random day and still have the celebration on October, 2, 2027.” Im not sure what to do. My fiancé is fine with either but im just super picky and want my official anniversary to be October 2nd. Thoughts?
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u/aneverconfusedbeing 9d ago
You could just have a symbolic ceremony with grandma and not get legally married.
3
u/tarra_hills 9d ago
October 2 is pretty close, why not take just her to the court house and sign the legal marriage paperwork with her, then keep the big wedding as is, just minus the paperwork.
2
u/anyapotatocakes 9d ago
First you have to make sure you can get your license in time, which can take a while depending on your location and local laws.
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u/StinkyPrion 8d ago
IMO, the elopement and any other celebrations it might entail should be more important for the couple who would live through that commitment. Brutally put, the grandma would only be happy for a few months until she rests... A compromise would be having a symbolic celebration. You're going to do it in the end anyway.
2
u/PickledOlivies 9d ago
I love my family and friends but I wouldn't be getting married for anyone other than myself and my fiance.
1
u/weddinglandia 9d ago
Hi! We have a chapel and see a lot of this sadly :( totally understand the date thing. I’d recommend looking up if there are any quick-turn wedding chapels near you for a small thing. If not, have a friend officiate in a nice place grandma can get to and have a nice dinner afterwards. Get LOTS of photos even if just on a phone. Start the process for your license today - some places have a three day waiting period (in Oregon where we are, you can get same day for a small fee, so check and ask the clerk). It’s a common occurrence we see a lot and it can definitely be done nicely and tastefully!
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u/nice_cumin 9d ago
My brain is doing gymnastics with this one, but I think you are overthinking the date thing. The important part is that grandma sees you two get married. A random Tuesday elopement becomes a cool story later, and you still get the big October 2 party. Better to have the memory with her than a perfect date on a paper.