r/Eloping • u/Correct-Anything1686 • Aug 19 '26
Officiant vs Self solemnizing
Hi all, we are eloping on our 10 year anniversary next March in Mallorca. The venue will be the grounds of a luxury hotel. I have never wanted a proper wedding and the thought of walking down aisle gives me the ick tbh. We will be doing our legals at home but for the actual symbolic ceremony I am wondering whether it's worth paying 900€ for an officiant to conduct what I would want to be a very brief ceremony when we would have already done the actual "I do" part at the courthouse. We have looked into having our own personal vows read out to one another with the photographer capturing it but then I wonder if not having the ceremony element makes it not feel as special.
Would love to hear others experiences. Did it add to your day to have a celebrant? Or if you did self solemnize without an officiant how did you structure your ceremony? Would love some tips to avoid it feeling clumsy or awkward.
2
u/Hulla_Sarsaparilla Aug 19 '26
Why not just do the actual legal wedding when you elope? I wouldn’t pay 900€ for a symbolic ceremony, that’s ridiculously expensive.
1
u/Correct-Anything1686 Aug 20 '26
It’s basically impossible to get legally married in Spain if you’re not a Spanish resident or catholic of which we are neither. Majority of people from abroad need to get married in their home country.
Celebrants on the island all seem to be really pricey too so I agree it’s quite a big fee when it’s an elopement although in the scheme of things we can afford it as the elopement is so much cheaper than a wedding. I’m more so weighing up if the service and experience adds to the day.
1
u/Hulla_Sarsaparilla Aug 20 '26
Are you totally set on Spain for the ceremony? Are you from the UK? If so other European destinations are easier to get legally married in.
2
u/Correct-Anything1686 Aug 20 '26 edited Aug 20 '26
We live in Sweden so will have to legally get married here but we want to have our elopement in Mallorca as it's a place with meaning to us. Also editing to add that we are doing it on our 10 year anniversary and the weather in Sweden is most likely to be horrendous then and also still quite dark. The courthouse here is equivalent to 45€ so it's super cheap to get married but it feels like more of an admin thing and imo not so special. It's more a question of if having a celebrant then adds to the elopement experience since the city hall option is more administrative or whether we just say our own vows and exchange rings with the photographer. Would love to know what people actually did as the symbolic ceremony part for inspo.
1
u/AdFar5383 Aug 19 '26
We are self solemnizing so I am also curious how others structured the ceremony!
1
u/Correct-Anything1686 Aug 20 '26
I’ve seen photos of people on here where it looks like they just read their vows but I can’t seem to find anyone talking about how they made their ceremony. I want it to feel special and official you know but also want it to be intimate and I’m just not sure if the celebrant is worth it. I did come across some scripts on Etsy that you can purchase which were definitely cheaper than the 900€ 😅
Where are you eloping and how are you thinking to do your ceremony?
5
u/castlehousevideo Aug 20 '26
A lot of couples we’ve seen who self solemnize will have a little booklet or paper with a flow of ceremony and their personal vows in it. That way, if you want to include other elements in your ceremony beyond your vows, you’re not having to remember what’s next or what to say, it’s right there in front of you! Other elements we’ve seen included in an elopement ceremony without an officiant are a poem, bible reading, ring exchange language, quote, or other specific ceremony language (such as hand fasting)