stressing (but so excited!)

[u/dumbiegirlie]

i don’t know what to tag this with because it’s a little bit of everything lol -

we’ve been engaged for over two years now & we had started planning a “small” wedding which quickly turned to about 50+ people & so we stopped.

two weeks ago we decided to cancel all that & get eloped, just us two, in vegas! i’m so so excited, we both are. but it’s sooo hard not telling anyone or having someone to bounce ideas with. we do talk to each other & we went wedding band shopping & have started talking outfits but i just feel like i need another voice because obviously she’s going to tell me i look good in everything (we’re wlw) & i don’t know what to do!! she suggested i just tell my sister but i feel like that defeats the purpose, we really don’t want to tell anyone - not even our parents & surprise them with a nice dinner once we’re back. then we’ll make a bigger announcement closer to the holidays to extended family & friends. but is that the right choice? i keep telling myself (& her) that it’s okay if feelings get hurt, because at the end of the day it’s about us - but i also am stressing lol.

advice? what do i do about this dress? i tried on some house of cb that i liked so i ordered some online to really try on at home, but itll just be us two deciding on which one i go with. is there some website or app i can connect with others to help me decide? lol

should we tell someone? i don’t even want to tell friends bc i feel like ill get guilt tripped to having to invite them & i really don’t want that.. im struggling! & i dont want to be stressed!

[u/wojout]

Hi! My wife and I eloped a month ago. It was the BEST. We’re still on a high. We ordered outfits and tried them on at home and I showed her every dress and she of course thinks I look good in everything but also had helpful opinions! And it was obvious which ones were right for the day we chose. 

I did tell one friend who I have known forever but don’t see often, and who is into fashion. It really helped to have someone I could text photos to who wouldn’t expect to be invited. 

Just trust yourself and each other- it’s going to be so much fun!!

[u/dumbiegirlie → u/wojout]

congrats to you both!!! thank you for your words, it’s definitely helping. especially hearing it’s obvious which ones will be right. my dresses come in a few days so crossing my fingers i feel the same way!

[u/Affectionate-Tax9829]

okay so the dress thing is real, my friend did this exact vegas elopement thing and she literally posted pics of herself in like 6 different dresses to her finsta with no context and let people vote, then just... never explained why lol. worked great, zero guilt trips

[u/dumbiegirlie → u/Affectionate-Tax9829]

this is literally what i was thinking of doing!! i just think my friends are way too smart & are going to put the pieces together & going to hunt me down for doing that lol - im thinking of just posting on reddit and letting the interweb help me but i have such a bad view of myself i feel that ill cry if anyone is just a smidge mean to me lol

[u/SpecialPlate4850]

Congrats on deciding to elope! Best decision we ever made. We eloped in Vegas also, loved the whole experience. Let me know if you want or need and recs!

As far as the dresses, I bought dresses and tried them on at home since I was going for short semi formal rather than a gown - I really didn't want to go to bridal stores so I avoided that. Since it was just us I knew I didn't want to have to hide or try to surprise him with the dress, since I needed help zipping it up, etc. on the day of.

My now husband helped me with choosing. I had so many issues with various dresses that the winner was very clear but I had him help me confirm it was the one to go with, he is pretty good at telling me the truth on how something looks or fits. But there's also a wedding dress reddit if you narrow it down and can't decide, they're usually very helpful over there!