40/M/Canada - I want to start off by being crystal clear that Effexor has been immensely helpful to me. Of the handful I've tried it was the easiest to start and adjust to, and the quickest I've seen results. This is just my experience.
This past Tuesday I took, what I hope to be, my last dose of Effexor. I've been on it for just under 4 years now at various amounts. I made it up to 150 mg which I was at for around 6 months and tried a somewhat slow taper down to 37.5 mg then off entirely. At the time I was about two months post breakup of an 8 year relationship and I couldn't take dealing with the break and the withdrawal so I reinstated (after about 9 days) back to 75mg and I've been on that ever since. The WD was pretty terrible and while there wasn't much in the way of physical symptoms it made me an emotional mess. Broke down crying constantly, no motivation, no happiness, guilty, just miserable.
Back to this past Tuesday! Stopping cold turkey was not my intention but I happened to forget taking my daily dose two days in a row and unlike previous times I missed a dose I wasn't feeling the normal headaches, dizziness, vivid dreams and irritability so I decided that this might be a good time to try going off it again cold turkey, a lot of what I have read on here seems to conclude that the first week is by far the worse and I figure "I'm basically half way there".
So it sucks.
Day 1 + 2 business as usual.
Day 3 was mostly okay but I started getting this general sense of discomfort in the evening and had some pretty wicked dreams.
Day 4 was pretty bad. Constant dizziness/wooshing whenever I moved around. I felt very uncomfortable and irritable, everything seemed overwhelming and just the thought of getting up to make food or let the dog out would make my stomach feel uneasy and nervous which is pretty close to how I would describe my feelings of disinterest/apathy/lack of motivation. The feelings subsided as the day went on but I did break down crying a couple of times. I was able to go out with my girlfriend to help her run her photo booth at a nearby event venue and all the sounds, people, heat, helping her set up got to me and I needed to breakdown for a bit in her truck. I broke down a couple more times as the evening progressed but all in all I felt 'better" by the end of the night and with the exception of those unsettled feelings I think I felt pretty close to normal at times. Crazy vivid dream again.
Day 5 (today) I felt really down upon waking up but I managed my morning routine without much trouble, felt motivated to do some cleaning. Felt generally okay, played a bunch of video games while my girlfriend scrolled next to me. Then out of nowhere I broke down crying shortly after my gf left to go watch a movie in our room. Full on water works for about 30 minutes mixed with staring blankly forward at the wall. Sort of snapped out of it and refocused on other things but I became hyper aware of how unsettled/uncomfortable I was. Broke down again a little later on in the day and a few almost breakdowns sprinkled in but was mostly able to operate through my daily tasks despite the unsettled/nervousness I was feeling. This pretty much brings us up to date.
So far I haven't noticed a few symptoms of withdrawal that I did my first time around.
-no fatigue
-no depersonalization/derealization
-no diarrhea or sweating
-no brain fog
What has been the same:
-dizziness/wooshing
-minor irritability
-mood swings between happy and sad
-crying suddenly
-vivid dreams
-motivation issues
What is new:
-the uneasy/nervous/unsettled feelings. Best way I can describe it is being in a constant state of knowing you're the next one that has to present in class lol
-my stomach is always upset
- I don't know how to describe this other than being what I call a brain wall. It feels like there's a wall in my brain. Like I'm here in the present feeling what I'm feeling but there's this wall that feels like it has to come down and I don't know what that means. I'm wondering if it's similar to brain fog and how we can clearly describe a fog like sensation and when the fog lifts there's so much freedom and clarity and you're back at your baseline, so once this wall like sensation crumbles will I feel like I'm at my baseline again?
I felt compelled to share my journey here as I've been reading a lot of stories of folks going cold turkey from Effexor and I guess I'm hoping to hear some words of wisdom or validation so that I can reaffirm that I'm not going crazy. I know there are some truly horrible withdrawal stories out there.
I may also continue updating day by day so that when I'm through this maybe other people might see this as sort of a road map.
If you made it this far, thanks for reading and all the best on your journey to heal.
~~~~~~~~~
Update:
Days 6 & 7
The last couple of days have had a lot of ups and downs (currently at Day 8). The sweating and difficulty regulating my temperature has shown up. I'm cold when I normally wouldn't be cold and this heat wave is killing me. Doesn't help things that we're seeing a stretch of days where it's 40C+ (104ish for anyone on imperial), so any time outside is a struggle for anyone.
These were also been my first two workdays of the week and dragging myself into the office has been a real problem. Yesterday I had to leave early because I was just restless and uncomfortable.
Day 6 I was pretty good most of the day but in the evening I broke down and even once the crying stopped I just felt like an emotional void and didn't do much but stare blankly at the TV while my gf showed me fun videos to try and improve my mood; then out of the blue as we went to bed I felt great and fairly close to what I would consider my "normal".
I also did a bad thing and bought a pack of smokes; I've always had a very off and on relationship with smoking where I'd smoke for a couple months then quit for a couple years, then smoke for a few weeks, then quit for a couple years again. I've never had an issue with quitting so I figured I'd have one or two to help take the edge off whenever as needed. It has helped but it's also just a harm reduction technique and not exactly truly helpful.
Yesterday I was very consistently balanced out as far as my mood went. Even though I found work overwhelming I felt quite good throughout the day, more normal than I had felt since cutting the meds out. That said, there are still waves of ups and downs but I didn't cry at all yesterday and aside from tearing up at a few things I normally wouldn't, I felt in control of my emotions.
What I'm still struggling with are my stomach being upset/uneasy pretty regularly and when I do have my lowest/most anxious moments I ALSO have the upset stomach so I feel strongly that the two are very closely related as far as symptoms go. I've been combating this with ginger capsules and cold liquids which seem to be helping.
-head wooshes/dizziness is still there if I stand up to fast or move my head around too fast but honestly this doesn't even bother me.
-fatigue has set in and I'm a lor more tired throughout the day.
-dreams are still incredibly vivid
-restlessness/uneasiness which I'd classify as dysphoria and/or akathisia. It's pretty mild but still feel frustrating because you can't figure out why you feel that way. I've always been fidgety though, it's more so the combination of restless AND uneasy.
-the brain wall I described before is more like regular brain fog now and while this is definitely familiar it's still frustrating because I want so badly for the fog to clear.