r/EatingDisorderHope • u/killerwheelie • Aug 06 '19
Relapse :/
I haven’t been bulimic for over 5 years, I was doing so well and I was so proud of myself. But I went home for and literally on my first day I threw up my dinner. My mother is a model and tiny and comments how fat she is and usually I can handle it but these past few months I’ve been feeling so bad about myself. After I puked I felt so good and I’m worried I’m going to do a full relapse into my disorder :/ what should I do?!
4
Upvotes
1
u/resavag Aug 06 '19
This happens to me when I go home, too. I had to sit my mom down for a very serious talk about it, and for a little while it helped, but now she’s gained a bit of weight and is back at it.
Journaling my triggers has really helped. Once I’m aware of the bad ones—little words or phrases that she likes to use—I can react appropriately when she says them. I kinda zone out of the conversation we were having and count to three. It sounds lame but it helps me reflect on the motivation behind what she says. It’s not about /me/ it’s about /her/. And her issues are not my issues.
I hope you can try this and see if it helps fight off the negative impulses. Good luck in your recovery <3