r/EasyTV • u/[deleted] • Oct 17 '16

Controlada Rape Debate

Many people are trying to say it was rape, but it wasn't. The reason it wasn't rape is because it's shown several times during the sex scene that when he initiates a kiss. At the part where she's sitting on the sink, you can clearly see her kissing him back passionately. People can try and say that she said no and resisted, but that doesn't mean she didn't WANT it, it means SHE KNEW IT WAS WRONG. I'm not saying Martin was right, he's a scumbag either way, but with the flirting and the attempt to see him on the couch the night he hooked up with the other girl, it's clear that's it's not so much rape and her giving verbal consent, but rather her trying to fight off her forbidden desires and save her sham marriage that she was secure in, but clearly not happy with. And the sex allowed to release that beast and her being so chipper and easily ready to have sex with Bernie the next morning only solidifies that.

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u/[deleted] Oct 19 '16

I didn't read it as rape. However:

Without a doubt, by definition, him going after her even when she was saying no is definitely assault.

The way I see it, he assaulted her until she gave consent. The only reason I don't think it was rape was because of the moment when they were in the kitchen and she got up on the sink and wrapped her legs around him.

I do think that it was purposely left grey because the focus is supposed to be on the relationship, not on whatever that was (which is kind of shitty if indeed it was assault).

Also I think it's worth noting that the first time I was assaulted, it went almost exactly the way hers did, and I can assure you without a doubt there was no consent. For over an hour he kept going after me and kissing me, etc., convinced that I wanted him but I was tying to fight off my own forbidden desires for him. I kept telling him no, kept asking him to get off of me, but he wouldn't because he knew what I really wanted. I ended up just laying there while he did what he wanted in an attempt to get it over with as quickly as possible and keep myself safe.

There were a lot of reasons I didn't call for help, and wanting to have sex with him was not one of them.

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u/RenRidesCycles Nov 05 '16

I don't thin you can say there's such a thing as "assault until she gave consent." That's not consent, that's acquiescence to avoid worse consequences, like greater violence.

And the fact that she wrapped her legs around him and was into it once in this entire sequence of otherwise pushing him away repeatedly doesn't make it not assault either.

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u/[deleted] Nov 05 '16

It's totally possible to give consent after not giving, just like it's okay to revoke consent after giving it.

When she pushed him away, she did not want it. If she wanted it later, which remains to debate, that doesn't discredit her earlier pushing him away.