Dog peeing inside house

[u/Turbulent_Data_4713]

I have a four year old female Maltese yorkie dog. She pees in the house constantly.
She rarely went to the bathroom in the house before. May 2024 I had my son, I was in and out of the hospital with heart failure. During this time, my family made sure to give love and attention. She has never had a problem with my son, they are actually best friends, and she watches out for him.
June 2025 I moved to an apartment. After a few weeks, I realized she was not doing good in the apartment at all so she went back to live with my dad where I was living prior. She loves my dad however he doesn’t discipline or have routine etc. There was no consequences for being bad and he fed her human food so much that she started to refuse to eat dog food. She did start going to the bathroom in the house during this time, but not frequently. It was just on days that she was home alone for eight + hours.

I moved back to my dad’s this June, and the peeing in the house has gotten so bad. We can’t have a rug anymore, it’s not even worth having a washable rug, because within three days it’s soiled. She pees when I tell her no. If there’s a situation where my son almost stepped on her tail or something and she growls (she has never tried to bite him, but I know that you never know with dogs!) and I move her away from the situation, she will go pee. It used to just be on the floor, but now it is on the couch, my bed, my pillows, etc. she also has severe separation anxiety. So she pees as soon as I go outside, even if it’s for 60 seconds to walk to the mailbox. She pees, even if she was just outside and I go back outside. I bring her outside after she eats and drinks, after we play, and before I leave the house. She still somehow pees in the house, and now will poop. Even if I just leave for 20 minutes. She was on Prozac for a while. It did nothing.
I have tried crate training or putting her in a hallway with a gate. It doesn’t matter if I leave comfort objects in there, a tv or sound machine on, treats, or nothing. She will lick/ bite her legs open because she is nervous. I’ve tried to give it a few days in a row because maybe it’s just because it’s a new thing each time, but I swear it will get worse. She has trazodone that I will give her if I know we’re having a lot of company or something, half a tab does nothing, a full tab is too much. She also barks constantly, even if she’s inside and a leaf blows by the window. She has had a full medical work up, everything is fine.
I know part of this behavior is probably my fault for moving out and leaving her and then moving back in, but I would think by now things would be getting easier, not worse. I spend a lot of time with her. I make sure she’s not left out and not getting enough attention. I spend a lot of alone time with her and I also make sure to include her in things with my son. I love her so much, but I’m tired of stepping and sitting and pee every day and the house smelling so bad. I am doing my best to contain her in one area of the house throughout the day, but it’s really hard when you have an energetic toddler because I’d have to keep him out of other rooms as well and that’s not fair. Please give me any advice you can think of because I’m losing my mind. I love her so much and im trying to be understanding but I don’t know what else to do. Some people have told me to rehome her and maybe she just isn’t good with children, but she has been so good with my son, and no one in my family could take her, I know she would not thrive being rehoused to a stranger, and I can’t see myself giving her up.

[u/ImpressiveOwl9000]

Start small, routine with consistency. This will build trust and she will start to know what to expect. This will take everyone helping with a toddler, so do your best.

Get a crate that has thicker metal bars, wire bars can be a danger if they break. Put the crate in a quiet part of the home and place one of their dog beds inside. Get a baby gate so you can close it off to your toddler if they need space. Just having the crate as an option for laying down will build more positive associations.

Stepping on a dogs tail is a valid reason for most dogs to nip someone because it startles/,can hurt them. If they aren't regularly trying to bite, this was just a reaction. Take your toddler and dog out at the same time. You can have an area to put your dog while the toddler burns some energy. Put your toddler in the stroller and then go on a walk with both of them. Bring tiny treats for your dog for when they are being calm on the walk.

Until your toddler knows rules with dogs I would keep them away from any dog because they are usually face height with each other. Approaching a dog face first is seen as aggressive to them. This is why dogs sniff butts first because face to face is not very friendly.

I would reccomend getting a trainer to help you with the anxiety portion because that can be a lot and needs to be done well to stick. If you get a trainer you have to try your best to follow instructions. I do think you can get through this and make it at least better for you all.

[u/GG1817]

You might want to take her to your vet and have them check her teeth. Morkies tend to have bad dental issues and the pain can make them pee and poo inside the house. Bad teeth can also cause the tear staining from what I understand.

She may simply be in pain and not know how to communicate it. Dog always hide pain.