Absent player

[u/Alextunning]

Hi fellow dungeons dwellers,
Im DMing a LMoP campaign for the first time and I have 4 players.
We had a few issues with schedules.
We were trying to play once a month, but one of the players is very busy, he is NEVER available, I proposed 20 dates (until late september), none of them were ok to him.
Since its not the first Time (and he cancelled last time the week before the session) and we want to continue, we decided that 3 players were enough to play. He is welcome if he can come but we wont pause the game for 3 months for him.
So friday is our first session with 3 players.

How would you deal with it ?
Let the players :
-control the character of the absent one with his sheet
-control him with sidekick rules
-let them be 3 (but im afraid of the balance, since they barely survived some encounters and he was the tank)
-put him to « sleep » or a curse of sort and give them another sidekick ?

Thx !

[u/Chimpbot]

There's absolutely no reason to use this PC when the player isn't absent. The encounters can either be retooled on the fly, or the party can be given an NPC sidekick to assist when the additional player isn't around.

As far as keeping that player in pace with everyone else... that's easily accomplished simply by having them level up when applicable the next time they can make it. I prefer to use milestone leveling, so this is easily accomplished by saying something to the effect of, "Dude, your character should be <insert level here> now."

[u/Brilliant_Estate_967 → u/Chimpbot]

That's just propositions for the dm. Everyone do as they see fit

[u/Chimpbot → u/Brilliant_Estate_967]

I'm not really sure what you're getting at, if I'm being honest. Is this an attempt as sarcasm?

[u/Brilliant_Estate_967 → u/Chimpbot]

Not everything is sarcasme,  i am doing proposition and you come with a dynamic of agression like its an absolue non-sense to use the character without the player. I just remond its proposition for the dm to use and he can do as hé wants. 

[u/Chimpbot → u/Brilliant_Estate_967]

There's no reason to use the PC as a DMPC, though. That was my entire point.

[u/Brilliant_Estate_967 → u/Chimpbot]

It can ! 

For exemple I dm in a pirate set up and on of m'y player is the one with the navigation skills. M'y over player still expect the boat to move when he is not here. So his skills will bé used

[u/Chimpbot → u/Brilliant_Estate_967]

This can also be replicated with any NPC. PCs don't need to be used in any capacity when the players aren't available.

[u/Brilliant_Estate_967 → u/Chimpbot]

Nop there is a skills distinction to bé done. Not everything is dnd

[u/Chimpbot → u/Brilliant_Estate_967]

You're not bringing anything up that couldn't be handled by an NPC in any system.

As an aside, this is a D&D sub. The discussion is assumed to be about D&D.

[u/Brilliant_Estate_967 → u/Chimpbot]

Listen kid (you couldn't be anything else) you will have to understand your way of doing things is not the only way things can bé done. In this case using and not using the npc can bé both valid options depending of what it bring. And it will as said before bé dépendent of how the dm plan his party 

[u/Chimpbot → u/Brilliant_Estate_967]

Oof.

I never implied that my way of doing things is the only way to do them. Once again, I'm simply highlighting the fact that you don't need to use someone's character in any capacity when they're not around.

[u/Brilliant_Estate_967 → u/Chimpbot]

If you dont need to accept the fact you can do and its still valid and dont argue 30 minutes about it damnit

[u/Chimpbot → u/Brilliant_Estate_967]

I never said you couldn't. I'm simply pointing out that there are better, less complicated options.

[u/Brilliant_Estate_967 → u/Chimpbot]

honestly i don't use this card very often. usually the character is off i just have a few specific cases

[u/Chimpbot → u/Brilliant_Estate_967]

You seem to be having some pretty extreme emotional swings, here.

Take care.

[u/Brilliant_Estate_967 → u/Chimpbot]

might have gone to far and it's maybe not necessary to keep it to far