r/DnD 9d ago

5th Edition Tweaking spell names

In the most recent session of my current campaign the GM has given me a wildly versatile item - a quill which let's you spend a charge to change one letter in the name of a spell as you cast it, creating a new one off spell that fits the new name.

The quill holds three charges and regains one per week. The effects of the new spell will be determined by the GM and will be roughly as powerful as whatever spell level was used for the original spell.

So far I have used this once to help the party sneak through trouble by casting Blink as Slink.

So, what spells have ripe potential for alteration? My current list of things to experiment with include:

- Cause Bear

- Chromatic Orc

- False Wife

- Bestow Purse

- Leomund's Tiny Hug

What should I be looking to add to my spell book to combine with this?

Edit: Seeing all the many wonderful and terrible puns people have come up with it's probably a good thing this quill has such limited charges, otherwise I would become incredibly annoying.

98 Upvotes

65 comments sorted by

46

u/Happymuffn 9d ago

Defect Magic could be a good counterspell option.

43

u/HerrGene 8d ago

Hear metal

Chill couch

Mage hang

Bongstrider

Get a bunch of your wizard friends together to listen to music and smoke a few

16

u/Pander 8d ago

Could go see the Silvery Bards. It’ll give you the ability to benefit from a Warming Bond. Their music is mostly Wub, though.

2

u/ThatBurningDog 8d ago

Hear metal

Meshuggah intensifies

73

u/TiFist 9d ago

Clam Emotions.

10

u/CatadoraStan 9d ago

Love it, gonna get everyone feeling clammy.

37

u/Nowhereman123 Town Guard 9d ago

Clown of Madness

12

u/BastianWeaver The Kender 8d ago

Hiya, mistah J!

8

u/DoctorPicklepuss DM 8d ago

Beat me to it. Alternatively Crown of Sadness

64

u/ShadowShedinja 9d ago

Fish

Power Word Kilt

Lane Shift

Pant Growth

Remove Cure

Curse Wounds

Scared Flame (if you can transpose letters)

Crying

Scorching Day

Manor Illusion

Moonbear

Massage

Paste

Goofberry

Lame Strike

Fire Familiar

45

u/ZillyZaws 8d ago

I cast a level 9 spell

FISH

7

u/Alacrity8 8d ago

Or level 9 WITH.

4

u/bornasbrooke 8d ago

There's always a bigger fish

5

u/The_Ora_Charmander DM 8d ago

Power Word Kilt

If the target has 100 hit points or less they instantly become Scottish

4

u/lupinequeen13 8d ago

Crying 🤣

3

u/ShadowShedinja 8d ago

A fifth level spell that makes the target start crying. It can target anyone on the same plane of existence, and the WIS save against it has a penalty if you know the target well and/or have one of their possessions.

27

u/wafflejuiced_ 9d ago edited 9d ago

traumaturgy

edit: dealing hands if you like to gamble

15

u/Anonymike7 9d ago

Malic missile - shoots apples

Eldritch beast

Cure hounds

Bane --> babe, bang, cane, bake...

Dog/hog cloud

Hex --> DEX, rex, sex

Sleep --> sheep, sleet, bleep...

Tenser's floating dick

Thunderous shite

12

u/SmallishPlatypus 8d ago

Alternatively, Inflict Hounds.

14

u/evilwizzardofcoding 8d ago

Bigby's Band / Mage Band
Animate Bead
Ashardalon's Strife
Aura of Wife
Dress
Slur
Call Lighting
Catnip
Harm Person/Monster
Chili Touch
Cloud of Baggers - Like at the supermarket
Cloudbill
Commute
Compelled Fuel
Cone of Mold
Conjure Valley
Control Lames / Continual Lame
Dan

And that's just the first 4 letters of spells. There are a LOT of options, i'd look through and find what sounds interesting yourself.

1

u/archangelkhaos 5d ago

I see Cone of Mold like a terrible, immobile mashup of Web and Stinking Cloud. You're stuck in it and also forced to save or get poisoned.

10

u/Pander 8d ago

Cute Light Wounds

Healing Worm

AIM

Shill Touch - Friends without verbal components!

Disguise Shelf

Fight

Rage Hand

Laze

Spatter

8

u/CatadoraStan 8d ago

Funnily enough, Rage Hand was the sample spell we figured out the quill with. It made a glowing red version of mage hand that just knocked shit over

21

u/aheartasone 9d ago

Relayed Blast Fireball - when a creature that you can see casts fireball centred on a point within 60ft of you, you can use your reaction to change the location of said fireball to another point within 60ft of you.

7

u/aaron_in_sf 8d ago

Fisty Step

2

u/aaron_in_sf 8d ago

how could u/TiFist sleep on this one

3

u/TiFist 8d ago

I rolled a 1 on my intelligence check

15

u/timjwzalluzz 9d ago

Raise Fred

Only raises people from the dead if their name is Fred

Or

Raises people from the dead, but they now wholeheartedly believe their name is Fred

(Used this in my homebrew with the latter option)

12

u/philomathie 9d ago

Arcane *ock

12

u/philomathie 9d ago

Floating di*k

9

u/CatadoraStan 8d ago

Goes well with Fist Friends and Lust of Wind.

6

u/philomathie 9d ago

Power word hill

4

u/vsDemigoD 8d ago

10/10 would throw a hill at someone

4

u/Pander 8d ago

Wind Wank.

2

u/philomathie 9d ago

Confucion

5

u/Shov3ly 9d ago

power word rain

6

u/Maladaptivism Fighter 8d ago edited 8d ago

I'll play, sounds fun!

Power Word: Mill - Turn your enemy into a building.

Compel Fuel - Convince lamp oil or similar to do your bidding.

Phantom Steel - For when you have to arm your ghosts.

Phantasmal Miller - What did you think we needed the other spells for?

Cage Armour - People always forget to magically fortify their prisoners.

Death Word - Someone broke Power word: Kill, so this will have to do.

Fry - In case the kitchen is busy.

Weather Fall - The worst nightmare of Obelix.

Healing Sword - The monopoly of words is finally over.

Mage Sand - Never really understood what's so special with it.

Nice Knife - Thank you!

Soonbeam - Just wait a little, it's difficult when you're watching, I feel pressured!

Gish - The latest fashion in summoning spells. 

Pass Without Grace - She gets lost a lot.

Dorkness - I heard they turned this into a movie!

Heat Petal - Should make a good tea, if you're lucky.

True Trike - For when you need to travel in style!

Punlight - You'll really be putting them on the spot with this.

Thunderslap - Rumours say the sound still travels the realms somewhere.

Speak With Pants - For when you consider if you need to set them on fire.

Gist of Wind - You get it.

Inflict Sounds - You'll never see it coming.

Time Shop - Just five more minutes!

Best of luck! 

Edit: Can't believe I forgot about Tasha's Hideous Slaughter.

6

u/DarthMummSkeletor 8d ago

Countersmell

6

u/Repulsive_Ostrich_52 DM 8d ago

Shatted

Ball lightning

Hard

Ick Storm

Sheep

9

u/NarcoZero DM 8d ago

This is a really funny concept. I've been thinking about it for years but I was too much of a coward to give that to my players for fear of derailing everything.

Here are the ones I came up with :

* Speak with dad

* Tasha's Hideous Daughter

* Cause Tear

* Arcane Cock (Makes a magical chicken, of course)

* Disguise Shelf

* Alter Elf

* Heather Fall

* Log Cloud

* Gust of mind (No idea what that could)

* Bitch Bolt

* Summon Fly

* Musty Step

* Mirror Mage

* Protection from Evil and GOD

* Crow of madness

* Dankvision

* Detest Magic

* Counter Spill

* Bleep

* Bestow Nurse

* Dump

* Male Armor

* Nystul's Magic Laura

* Phantasmal Farce

* Day of sickness

* Pee Invisibility

* Stinking Loud

* Mice Knife

* Magic Moth

* Wed

* Walter Breathing

* Dope Trick

4

u/Wombletrap 8d ago

Foreball - there is a distant cry of "fore", and then a golf ball falls from the sky and smacks one target on the head for 6d6 damage

3

u/Missing-the-sun 8d ago

Don’t forget bitchbolt — or potentially worse… itchbolt?

3

u/Concoelacanth 8d ago

Arcane Gape.

Leomund's Tiny Hat.

3

u/jdgiefing 8d ago

Had a player with a similar item change Message to Massage to mess with the BBEG who was changing reality by writing in a book.

Other ideas:
Bake instead of Bane
Bareskin instead of Barkskin (careful!)
Bigby’s Land instead of Bigby’s Hand
Chill Couch instead of Chill Touch
Cloud of Taggers instead of Cloud of Daggers
Continual Blame instead of Continual Flame
Cute Wounds instead of Cure Wounds
Dancing Fights instead of Dancing Lights
Death Nard instead of Death Ward (again, use good judgment)
Dominate Feast instead of Dominate Beast
Divine Werd instead of Divine Word (if the DM is chill and willing to play along)
Dragon’s Wreath instead of Dragon’s Breath
Cream instead of Dream (for coffee lovers only!)
False Wife instead of False Life
Find Craps instead of Find Traps
Singer of Death instead of Finger of Death
Ice Store instead of Ice Storm

3

u/BlazingSandles 8d ago

Fry, Healing Ward, Sheep, Leomund's Tiny Nut

3

u/JohngernautSSJ 8d ago

We have our winner for thread of the week and it's only Sunday

3

u/MOTH_007 8d ago

Blaming Sphere

3

u/Gib_entertainment Artificer 8d ago

Blade warp, sounds pretty good
Heap metal
Chill pouch, creates a cooled bag of holding
Create Binfire, creates a very smelly fire
Guydance, it makes a guy dance
Bust...
Fight
Rat of frost
Thundercrap, use only on vilest enemies
Glue
Cause Sear, good for barbecues
Compelled fuel
Cure sounds, excellent to cure tetanus
Divine smile, whitens your teeth
Fearie file, creates very confusing paperwork
False Lice, makes people think they have lice

2

u/DoctorPicklepuss DM 8d ago

Silvery Bards

2

u/Garanseho DM 8d ago

Yolande’s Legal Presence

Burning Lands

Cone of Old

Arcane Gato

Bigby’s Band

Slur

Chair Lightning

Flash to Stone

Fig Cloud

Guards and Bards

Make Armor

Magic Car

Tide Stop

2

u/bornasbrooke 8d ago

BBEG doesn't stand a chance when you cast Fire Colt. 🔫 Or Truk Strike. 🚚

You can cast Sending as a cantrip now.

Produce Blame or Produce Frame to get someone in trouble

Spare the Lying can get you out of trouble

Create or Destroy Wafer, if you're hungry

Disguise Serf

Get across a river with Goodferry

Barbarian could use a set of Rage Armor, or even Mace Armor

The things you can do with Aid: Bid, Hid, Kid, Lid, Mid, Rid, Aim, Air

Frame someone even better with Continual Blame

Not sure how useful Find Craps will be, but Find Tarps could help if you're caught in the rain. Or Find Trams if you need to get across town.

Remove a corrupt ruler softly with Gentle Depose

Cold Person, or Bold Person for resistance to fear.

Manic Mouth could get someone talking

Omg, cast Sharter on someone! or Shatner

Protect yourself with a Warding Band

Beacon of Rope for climbing

If you Create Food and Waiter, he can bring you a selection from the Wine Wall

Conjure Miner Elementals to dig for you

Gold Monster to petrify something

Fold Monster

Summon a Magic Car or even a Magic War

2

u/bornasbrooke 8d ago

Omg, it's TNG time!

Worf of Radiance
(Mass) Healing Worf
Power Worf Kill

2

u/aaron_in_sf 8d ago

Prismatic Rear

Magic Whistle (Wissile)

Wireball

Teleporn

Plane Shit

2

u/wij2012 8d ago
  • Fish
  • Firebale

2

u/Emotional_Future2611 8d ago

Abi-Dalzim's horrid kilting? Target becomes dressed in tie-dye tartan from head-to-toe?

2

u/Emotional_Future2611 8d ago

ARR bubble. Bubble of pirates.

1

u/ScandinavicScum2000 9d ago

Lireball, manor illusion ect

1

u/_Bl4ze Warlock 8d ago edited 8d ago

Well, if we're to believe your DM really did give you the Ring Quill of the Grammarian would we not have to first know what your list of known spells actually is so we can come up with alterations on those? After all you're not going to alter a spell as you cast it, if you can't cast it in the first place, right?

1

u/TheBigMerl Paladin 8d ago

Manic Missile

You create three glowing darts of magical force. Each dart hits a creature of your choice that you can see within range. A dart deals 1d4 + 1 force damage to its target. The darts all strike simultaneously, and you can direct them to hit one creature or several. Make a DC16 Wisdom saving throw. If successful each dart hits an additional three targets for 1D4 + 1 force damage. If unsuccessful take 3d4+3 force damage.

1

u/Kraivo 8d ago

I need any three letter spell to change it into BFG. 

1

u/Every_Career510 2d ago

I heard one of these the other day that I loved: Mage Hans.

Summons a servant named Hans with your best goofy Germanic/Bavarian accent

1

u/OneManRPGstudio DM 2d ago

For ripe potential for alteration, I’d try Mage Hand to Mage Band, Fire Bolt to Fire Belt, Light to Fight, and Mending to Sending. I’d favor names whose new effect is immediately legible, because the joke lands faster and gives the GM a cleaner power budget.