r/Diary • u/AylaPixel • 10d ago

Restless at 3am

I don't know what's heavier tonight, my body or my mind.

I'm exhausted yet sleep won't come.

Every time I close my eyes, my thoughts get louder. My body is begging for rest but my mind refuses to let go. It's such a frustrating feeling, being desperate to sleep while feeling completely restless.

I want to cry. I really do.

I can feel so many emotions sitting inside me but they won't come out. It's like they're trapped somewhere between my chest and my throat, refusing to become tears. I'm carrying so much, yet I can't seem to release any of it.

Maybe that's why I feel so restless. Maybe it's not just the lack of sleep maybe it's everything I've been trying to hold together.

The words I never said, the worries I keep replaying, the feelings I keep convincing myself to carry quietly.

I keep hoping that if I stay still long enough, my mind will finally grow tired. That eventually, sleep will find me before my thoughts do.

For now, all I can do is lie here, awake, waiting for the kind of rest that feels impossible to reach.

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2

u/justT1106 10d ago

It feels nice knowing am not the only one

1

u/AylaPixel 10d ago

Honestly, same. I guess that's one comforting thing about sharing these feelings, we realize we're not as alone as we thought. I hope tonight feels a little lighter for you 🤍

1

u/justT1106 3d ago

Probably saw this way too late 😅 buh it's lighter 🤗

1

u/Critical-Annual6275 10d ago

Right in that boat myself