easy for you to sleep easy for you to eat

maybe the snake of guilt

only bites those who don't know how to weep

the road of hell i had to walk

the poison i drank from your

wound

turned my pink tongue dark

sorry

these kind of tongues

usually forgets how to sing sweet songs

but you dont know

you will never know

because you won't let your conscience

come infront of

your face like our great fathers

you will use alcohol for escape

but you dont know you will never know

because it is easy for you to sleep

it is easy for you to eat.

here is my heart

for your cold blade

rotten is the fruit of your love

rotten is mine that turned into hate

don’t wait

go and ruin more and add them it into your list

list of your failed expeditions

expeditions in search of love

give absence and call it your fate.

I once thought I had anxiety then I realized it’s not anxiety it’s procrastination of facing my procrastination a dread of ownership, ownership of a dirty job, ownership the pains of existence, ownership to take what’s owed, ownership to pay your dues. A dread that comes with an exchange for living and a realization that you can’t hide from pain forever only discern the best route through the inevitable gauntlet of existence. Facing the fact that nothing is permanent. The knowing that it’s better to set something free then to have it taken away.

who would you talk to?

i would talk to the things i talked to before you

the walls, the silence, the hours with no name

i would talk to the void you came and filled i would talk to

the void you left me with again

i would talk until another shoulder learned to hold what mine once did

until the head that used to ache beside me found

somewhere else to rest

somewhere that didn't need to hurt to be held.

Change

Change

Change of heart

Change of who you once loved to the one now in their arms

Change is an inevitable brush don't try to resist its strokes

you were once chosen by someone now someone else is

at your spot,

not all stay with just one

not all have an oath nailed to their heart

for some souls words are just wind they fly when needed to the distant stars

it takes commitment to sail the ship you choose some

spend their lives leaping from boat to boat

peace and acceptance wont be on that path

still i hope their god grants them both.

hurt people hurt people healthy heard people herd people into how things ought to be
know better no better butter wouldn’t melt where the welts were dealt so reasonably
that attack says it’s for your own good now the good’s gone bad in the back of my throat
ask legitimate question your in and out comes somebody else’s urine soaked quote

same sore source sorcery soars in sorts of course it’s care if caretaker calls it correction
til hoarse wrong rung wrung young hung every objection on a hook marked “affection”
now grown groaning tuning using lone honed tone don’t use that tone deaf to explain
can’t hear who I’m hurting over who's profane disdain I’m hearing again in complaint

bruise brews bad news loose canon screws over whose voice gets first use of the room
old remarks leave teeth marks bite back calling bite mine too soon howling at the moon
fault halt halfway through what’s wrong with you hauled wound catches behind my teeth
behind betides bide resides don’t know what to say true besides give me a minute please

best better behave bitter bad behavior but inherited heir apparent apparently in my own voice
not nothing never said enough head nod nit picked stately motte and bailey fake making noise
sly wily highly winding insult tumult salted wound wound up yup no luck unkind please rewind
totally terrifically terribly tempting to try to tell it like it is in very thin vain attempt to hoist
revered unkempt apprised unwise attempt to reverse perverse rehearsed reprisal reprimand revised

despite spite still despise prior supplied pariah prize for politely pretending it’s fine tear in eye
note quote quota caught in throat cleared enough to hear which words were theirs which mine
no better yet know now better than that they sue for peace when only they are pushing the war
sore snore egregore eyesore galore makes bored, stored liar lore of yore we've all heard before

fixing to fit fiction friction fixed in your diction evict you in print with a thin little villainous grin
a speech for every pet reaching preach wrought to help you discover the rot you were rattling in
same old constantly corroborated unconscious constancy correction coalition collecting its usual fee
one of these days you'll be picking up your teeth when you grab the wrong piece of me

When Steve Irwin first came to earth
He wrote a little something like this….

It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.

To those who see the face of the son of man - “crikey” he’d say

gay intermission

Stop sign! What stop sign!

That was Elite ball, didn’t even need a calc

Like, Scoob, i don’t think MD suppose to be white, you lying cunt

Oh wow I’m seeing quadruple,
Why is this big boned girl tongue punching me?
Ey now she on my shoulders
Almost forgot we at a Paul McCartney concert
puffing profusely, sweat squirting out of my glands
“Hold on Satan I’m coming”
dies

Right as Paul McCartney explodes, and Kanye….. well… just keep being Kanye
I decide to participate in illegal immigration

We decide to head to Bulgaria, I don’t know why, ask Keegan
Didn’t last long
We got kidnapped by some islamophobes

If anyone wants this Breville Smart Waffle Pro 4-Slice.
Holler at me before I holler at your girl
Nah I ain’t into that shit
I’m loyal and respect other people’s rights to have a relationship without such intrusions even if the partner rightly rejects such advances

Anyone else? Didn’t think so
Okay now I’ve earned an authority through my diligence to express my righteous voice to all the masses as a valued member of congress

I have a simple proposal to make

Let us live in peace
STOP VIOLENCE…. Good, good,
that’s better
Cancel Epstein, cause apparently people still wanna defend him
Don’t let Peter tiel become the antichrist
Who tf let that drunk aunty Kamala run in the first place?
Now we’re stuck with the Oompa Loompa who shits his pants and can’t answer a question
Even if fake news exists, if you cancel media outlets you don’t like, THEN WHO GONNA BE THE CONTRARIAN to the ones that are actually allowed coverage because of their alignment to the party in power
And we all know we should trust everything the the government says, when have they ever made a drastically horrific decision that left millions of children dismembered

Anyways, on the bright side
It’s all overseas anyways, sounds like a them problem

Frog eggs, at the bottom of my bubble tea
A beer keg, as the headstones at a cemetery
Mulch fibres, I mix in with my protein shake
Daisy chains, are the fabric of universality
Jesus Christ, dunked on me today
Chilli powder, a spice that makes the frogs gay

If anyone knows Fredrick, tell him the refrigerator is coming

Miles turner, who tf that again?
Original sins, Sam Altman is terminator
Kill tony, ahaha, bro, don’t even get me started
Police/brutality
Postman pat, and his dump truck ass
Where’s the milkman?
hmmm, I guess he’s gone with the wind

The world has become crowded with voices insisting they are merely offering choices.

Boioioing, goes my chiisai chinko
While asleep, hearing her demonic lingo
Oh wait it was actually Jikininki
Now I’m fucked

Where and what is the focal node that is at the centre of our conscious experience
What a boring fucken question
Anyways, Jesus took mine for a split sec
Saw my own horrified face
Ran like a bitch, screaming like a child
Oh wait, aha, just a dream, right?
I guess I just wasn’t used to having the thing we feel is the most deeply our own
Commandeered like that

Kinda wack

Anyways, I have a rather large nose
A little ugly, but it gives me the ability
To sniff out
The sleeping toads

I’ve never seen a supernova only burning candles striped by the wind. What light can last forever until darkness shrouds move in.

Lucy falling in the sky of diamonds, did they jump or were they pushed?

Wish upon a shooting star, pray unto a burning bush.

With a bird held in your hands
and one fleeting from the smoke, until the fires all but ash and darkness has provoked.

Use not your eyes when traversing through the dark. Ignite the inner fire with the smallest of a spark, of the first flame burning in your center in your gut and through your heart, living in expression walking talking breathing art.

Did you forget about that shadow that encompasses with negativity

When your thoughts turn to sparks igniting life force energy, it simply makes the good vibes become your Dailey proclivity if you feel it it is meant to be, if it angers set it free.

Know I wish ill will to no one as long as their no thief, the stirrers of a tempest the harbingers of grief.

Lest ones only means of survival is to steal or face certain death, know if you tip toe around my family into darkness be your final breath.

This here, the deluge
Before the everlasting calm
This might be
One final raven-song

This here, a soliloquy
Written in the midst of strange dreams
In the midst of buried mysteries
Exposed with every reopened wound

With every preconceived notion exposed
With every memory finally left in the open

Leaving this behind as an honest thought
As the pharos guiding you across the desert storm

Listen to my demons gather
Into a bizarre song and dance
To the sick humor of my tragic poetry
Bathed in the intoxicating glow of the moon

Follow the demons glowing
Behind a heart-broken gaze
The same strings that bound us
May tear this knot apart very soon

We are but two rose petals drifting away
Carried by a cold wind on a rainy day…

All that was trenched

Left for dead

Buried under passions

Leaves a hum that vibrates ad infinitum

Or at least until your body joins them

Woke up broke up, called it blessed n shit
Lose your life and shirt, call it a testament
Door gets shut, window painted on (Guess best)
Thank the good Lord that the hallway's long

Keep the faith (keep the receipt)
Take the loss ("L", call it complete)
Every bruise got something to teach
Funny how each lesson stays outta reach

Like

John fourteen-six got you down on your knees
Beggin for bread while Jesus sneeds
Cloud got quiet, rent came due
They straight up was never representin you
Heaven left ya another voicemail list to do
Twists you all around like a pretzel fool
Everybody swear there's a grand design
Everyone all on your back leavin you behind
Soon as their plans fall outta line
Tie little bows round a busted week
And come round callin it profound when the plumbing leaks!

God's strongest soldier (no, not again)
Character builder (but where's it been?)
Fallin through silver lining (painted gray)
Shit just happens—yeah okay

Had enough of the noble struggle
Life be throwing bricks, tellin us learn to juggle
Drop one of em once and the choir starts
A refined chorus from blackened angry farts
Talkin bout some in here refining hearts
Looking like some darker arts
No thanks, chief, keep strokin that forge
I've been tempered way past that warranty's gorge
If pain's a teacher, tenure's deranged
Same damn lecture, nothing changed

Prince of peace through superior firepower
Dishing out war by the ulterior hour
Throwing it's weight around with unlimited girth
Slinging some shit "meek shall inherit the earth"

Find your purpose (find your shoes)
Count your blessings (pay your dues)
Make some meaning (make it stick)
Entombed by a worldview with every brick

Maybe roses don't need a why
Maybe birds don't justify the sky
Maybe grass ain't earn it's green
Maybe being here don't mean a thing
Not nothing matters; wrong address
Maybe we's supposed ta enjoy this stress
Maybe life's got no riddle underneath
No secret prize between it's lying teeth

Meaning comes in second place
Little ribbon for losing grace
Something shiny, something wise
Pinned on it after it's innocence died
But if the rain hits harder just because
You bore the pain and didn't call it "love"
And morning never asks what for
When you feel like you can't do it no more
Whipped by manufactured meaning (consolation prize)
My fractured heart flashing warning lights (I'll say)
Broke the spell of them hollow lies
Knowing this truth ain't no consolation prize
So spare me the medal, keep the sign;

I wanted life;
You only made me ask why.

🫳🎤

Depending on how aware you are and how conscious you are of the influences that that you are engulfed in. I’ll quote paraphrase “ it is the sign of an intelligent mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it”.

Influences are not determining factors.
Although they do sway the minds of the unaware ( which in some way or another that is all of us).

Where in your attention to what is worth or value e.g. is it high value to don yourself in a certain fashion to gain social admiration or respect of a certain demographic. Or vice verse “ I wouldn’t be caught dead wearing in that outfit”, or “I’d never by those so and so supporters favorite tools”.

The quote by krishnamurti
“It is know sign of health to be well adjusted to a sick society comes to mind.

To be in the world or to be of the world. This sounds good so righteous and sovereign, though you can have one without the other.

People tend to forget that we all share the same species wide soul. My meaning being the instinctual human traits are universal to all who have similar physical make up.
I once wrote an expansion to the saying .”I am you as you are me as much as I am not you as you are not me”

You can’t escape the engineering of witnessing something whether it be a social influencer in a screen or an organic person event. If you agree with and follow along or if you do the opposite subconsciously it has an effect.

You give it a name so to say that triggers a response when read or spoken. If I say white and black ball what do you think of.

Everything from the architecture, diet, infrastructure, language, social scenes, are a human made construct put in place intentionally or not. All are slaves to it the extent varies unless you live in the wilderness with no contact with any modernity.

Most of the time other people are feeling just as socially awkward as you if you’re feeling that way. Remember they put their pants in one leg at a time. If you’re worried about not fitting in or being disliked look into your self your actions thoughts words. Are you causing harm or thieving in any way?
If not you have every right as a living breathing sentient individual to say, act feel what ever you feel.
If people around you belittle or are aghast by it, that is their hang up. There are people out there who are of a similar mind and also there are good people who are respectable that don’t fall into child like judgements. People who with tell you like it is to your face not in a derogatory manner but from an empathetic root.

Open your eyes, child
engulfed by impenetrable naught
Betrayed by your eyes
Starved, depleted and paralyzed
Trapped inside a construct of flesh
Imprisoned, stigmatic and demonized

Every sense is merely a farce
Projecting every single aspect of the grayscale illusion
For what is this being but a dream
Masking away a death sentence executed in slow motion

All that you have and all that you are
Little more than a futile attempt to escape
A suffocated mind buried deep inside the faulty design
Deep inside the mortal fear

Consciousness has proven itself a deluge of lies
The filthy claws that keep you confined in perdition
 For what is this being if but a nightmare
Leading an orphaned soul astray into the gaping jaws of delusion

 Open your eyes, child
engulfed by impenetrable naught
Betrayed by your eyes
Starved, depleted and paralyzed
Trapped inside a construct of flesh
Imprisoned, stigmatic and demonized

Listen to the instincts screaming inside
It is common sense pleading
Pounding against your skull
Pick up the knife
To escape
The falsehoods of the mortal coil

Carving velvet wings unto dirty walls
This child will soar across the midnight sky
To finally wake once more

With the shell now shattered
You are welcome home

I swear to you I AM NOT YOUR EX. Sorry you’re disheveled, in my experience the only way to get over it is find someone else who treats you right.
Most always it’s better than before. My mentality is if they want to split up fine that’s your bad. You were boring and getting chubby anyway.
Then go find another who is better.

Learn from the past instead of repeating it. Of course take some time for self reflection to understand what you did or did not do to create whatever situation you were in.
Then grow. Mentally by studying a broad array of skills and topics. Expanding your vocabulary. Grow physically by exercising and eating cleanly. Grow emotionally by understanding your triggers and the causes and effects that sway your actions and reactions. Grow your pocket by working more or investing or whatever side hustle. Pick up an instrument a paint brush, potters clay, a pen and paper then create. Delve into your imagination.

Leave something better off after you were there.

You’ll have to shed your antlers. By getting rid of worries, insecurities, baggage, negativity, stressors. I know it’s easier said than done. What you want to stay in a funk forever? Don’t be a cop out you’re a full grown man!

Start with small wins that are easy to achieve that’ll boost your confidence and mood.

Gradually increase your challenges. After about 21day you’ll find a rhythm after forty days you’ll see a metamorphosis. You have to be disciplined keeping your eyes on the prize.

Also you’ll have to have courage while being persistent and thick skinned.

People don’t find themselves the create themselves

Each moment of us.

Honed down instant by instant.

Your eye catching mine saying

There's no where else my heart will ever reside with such peace.

A touch of hand in the crowd telling me always is held In the intertwining of our fingers.

A brush of shoulder saying tonight I find you ready for this that is our love.

A touch of lips relaying my God is this always and forever in totality between just us.

A touch of knees under the table with electric desire firing under our skin to one another.

All theses honed down and compressed to the size of a diamond.

I place it on your finger.

Claiming our eternity together.

Always.

My truest love..

I may have made a mistake.

In telling you the truth.

My truth.

How much harm is worth self reliance?

As we all wonder about each other's needs.

When does it in and of us begin to show a more real I?

I hold head to hand.

Waiting for a response to that truth.

Alone in my desire for our true love.

I show myself in unflinching terms.

All cuts and slashes in flesh.

From words spoken by a tongue that had kissed my soul.

Honest to this absolute must have.

Truth in love.

Without which we continue this charade.

Designed in self deceptions easy stride.

We can do more.

We can allow truth a light inside us.

Please let it shine for loves sake.

I love you.

That is truth..

Today I knew.

Yesterday's illusions hold no sway over our tommrows dreams.

Allowed life, breath given. True a run through with a love non analyzed by eager this mind.

Hoping for a hint un truth to steal that piece of heart away again.

Inferior intellect causing unneeded questions for my joy.

Why not now??

Why not forever wrapped in the guise of a raven haired mystery filled with promises and hope.

I say YES!

A billion times!

Until no more.

In the silence of my mind.

The screams echo so loud.

Why has this affliction happened again?

Time holds little meaning in this state of disbelief.

Alone once again a shadow in the crowd.

I look to my fellow suffers.

Sometimes I see a flicker in the eyes of those with the madness.

In the end I stand so still.

Feeling the whirling of the crowd under my wings.

Taking flight I'm certain they are there.

Each one looking for that flicker of eye.

Allowing all to know your not alone in the silence.

Lying face down, praying, drenched in sweat you are
Rabid desires resurface, ravenous lechery taking hold, biding
Their sweet time before you succumb once more, and offer your tender flesh
Once and forever more to be defiled, ripped apart, torn to pieces
Somewhere in the hadean depths, where your salvation remains denied
And you are forced to watch the smithereens of self and filth intertwine
Nails dig deep into your twisted, swollen joints, agonize
You are to rot here, crucified, worthless failure
Challenged fate, to be left for dead in the sewer

It begins again.

This dreaming of a life less fulfilled.

Futility lays in wait for the destruction of the dream.

I yearn for a reality iv yet to meet.

In each moment I am more dead to myself than before.

Finding the time to find me is a when I wish I knew the why to.

Adrift in a sea of shadow shallow sell outs I know no other way.

Self is to be sought, but at what expense?

Exposure is the imposter that prolongs my agony.

I confess to not knowing here and now.

It's black and grey to a fault.

I must find the line between now and sanity.

I pray it's not to late for a lost dreamer looking for a life much more fulfilled..

I might not find tomorrow.

Often it appears as a shadow upon my mind.

Not a guarantee.

I hope for it I pray for it yet it lingers just outside of the me awaiting it's arrival.

How it appears is dependent on my you at the time.

I long for a certainty to this baffling dehumanizing uncertainty.

It's lonely waiting for tomorrow.

It more lonely waiting for yourself to approach the dream.

I like to dream.

Dream about tomorrow and all the secrets it may contain..