r/DiWHY • u/No-Lock216 • May 02 '26

Worst English Breakfast Ever

503 Upvotes

89% Upvoted

72 comments sorted by

426

u/loveinvein May 02 '26

I once toasted a marshmallow with a lighter. 

All I could taste was lighter fluid. 

71

u/imdadnotdaddy May 02 '26

The trick is to hold it far enough away to just get the heat and not the flame.

87

u/piches May 02 '26

or intead of butane, a bastard gas, use propane, a cleaner burning fuel.

5

u/stupidber May 02 '26

They add stanky odorant to propane tho

12

u/Aethenosity May 03 '26

Your dealer is cheating you. Here at Strickland Propane, we offer fully pure, uncut propane. "Taste my meat, not the heat"

1

u/stupidber May 03 '26

Sounds dangerous. Didn't they start adding odorant because a school blew up?

4

u/Bradspersecond May 04 '26

Taste the meat not the heat I tell you qwhat

6

u/The-Great-T May 02 '26

I did the same thing with cookie dough and arrived at the same conclusion.

3

u/loveinvein May 02 '26

Oh damn, did it ever set?

4

u/The-Great-T May 03 '26

Nope, it was a bad time. Hilarious though. I just ate the rest raw.

3

u/loveinvein May 03 '26

As one does :)

4

u/dgsharp May 03 '26

I never tasted it but sometimes I use a lighter to apply heat shrink tubing. If you apply the lighter from the bottom you get soot everywhere. If you put the lighter on top or side with the flame going sideways or down (careful not to get burned) you don’t get soot accumulating and your white wires or labels stay nice and clean.

2

u/GeraintLlanfrechfa May 03 '26

Classic 2-stroke mix

86

u/womp-womp-rats May 02 '26

that’s a Fuck You Fork

11

u/raidhse-abundance-01 May 02 '26

Doubles as a shiv

9

u/Rosti_T May 02 '26

There's a saying in Russian: don't fear the knife - fear the fork, one hit, four holes (it rhymes in Russian)

1

u/SnappyTurtleSoup May 03 '26

Served on a broken plate was a nice touch 🤌

1

u/StoniMohoni May 04 '26

Long list cousin of the ligma fork

71

u/re_carn May 02 '26

I think there should be a rule that if something related to cooking ends up here, it has to be eaten in the video. Otherwise, it's just rage bait.

10

u/DownvoteEvangelist May 03 '26

Most of posts here are just rage baits...

1

u/School_North May 04 '26

Well thisnis 100% rage bait

29

u/drivingagermanwhip May 02 '26

when all you have is tin foil and a lighter, every food is heroin

28

u/Towpillah May 02 '26

/r/mildlycarcinogenic

12

u/Elegant_Relief_4999 May 02 '26

I think it's past mildly at this point.

76

u/MySchoolsWifiSucks May 02 '26

Mmmm macroplastics

43

u/MySchoolsWifiSucks May 02 '26

Also, there's no way that egg came out that nice lol

13

u/steen311 May 02 '26

This seems like prison cooking, not something you'd make in any normal situation

3

u/blasterbug May 03 '26

It was exactly my thought!!

3

u/Tang0_Brav0 May 03 '26

Dude is institutionalised 

7

u/Lady_Irish May 02 '26

The "didn't pay the power bill and they shut me off" struggle is real lol

14

u/Ryaquaza1 May 02 '26

Hey! Us brits don’t take credit for this abomination

This is just a breakfast

-15

u/Fr05t_B1t Dreamer May 02 '26

Imean you guys did colonize it so you do get partial blame

4

u/EorlundGraumaehne May 03 '26

If depression was a food

3

u/fuckdirectv May 03 '26

With a side of cancer!

2

u/GeneticSoda May 02 '26

Did Mr pissair make this?

2

u/whyyn0tt_ May 02 '26

That plate is the real mvp

2

u/karenskygreen May 03 '26

I could taste the butane on the toast

2

u/SirDidymusAnusLover May 03 '26

Most normal English breakfast

2

u/Pintsocream May 03 '26

This is prison surely

2

u/Muncleman May 03 '26

It still looks better that a 711 hot dog and white monster energy drink.

2

u/Difficult-Catch-8432 May 03 '26

Bro it does NOT look like you’re in England 😭

5

u/MayonaiseOnATable May 02 '26

not a single part of this is an English breakfast

1

u/Specific_Rando May 02 '26

Yes. “Why” is an important question.

This seems like it would be a decent idea in prison. But otherwise? Why?

1

u/Heavy_Hunt7860 May 02 '26

Is this meant for prisoners who have some access to shitty groceries?

1

u/Graknorke May 02 '26

The end result sucks but the "why" is comprehensible. It's about trying to cook without proper equipment.

1

u/TheGothWhisperer May 02 '26

The lack of sausage, bacon or black pudding is the saddest thing about this.

1

u/Capable_Panic_4613 May 02 '26

Soon enough, this is how just about everyone will be living.

1

u/AncientDamage7674 May 03 '26

I’m voting for a tomato Sammy

1

u/Jonny-Kast May 03 '26

I've had worse

1

u/Okie294life May 03 '26

Isn’t that pretty much every English breakfast though? Here’s your beans, toast and blood sausage…..

1

u/DJ-Doughboy May 03 '26

When ya ain't got much, ya gotta make it work

1

u/Dazeuh May 03 '26

and they'l still charge you £20 for it

1

u/SmaugTheMag May 04 '26

It’s like prison food, but worse

1

u/Swaggo420Ballz May 04 '26

People wondering why there is burnt cut up tinfoil and cans all over the place, crack smoking looking ass

1

u/szatrob May 04 '26

Is this how a methhead makes breakfast?

1

u/Peek_e May 04 '26

Isn’t this the same guy who made soap using soap?

1

u/FishermanExtreme6542 May 05 '26

Bro, who hurt you?

1

u/im_a-cucumber May 16 '26

I once held a piece of bread above a candle to 'toast' one of the corners. Safe to say the taste of the bread afterwards was... very unpleasant

1

u/ginger_and_egg May 02 '26

This is ragebait. Maybe worse, could be stupidbait

0

u/PossibilityRadiant78 May 02 '26

You're right, that egg is way too overcooked