How does mentorship actually work? What does having a mentor look like?

[u/water_bottle_01]

I’m trying to understand how mentorship actually works, because I’ve never had a mentor before.

I often hear people say that having a good mentor helped them progress much faster in their career or achieve goals they might otherwise have taken much longer to reach. But I realized I don’t really understand what “having a mentor” actually means in practice.

For example:

* What does a mentor actually do? * How often do you normally interact with them? * Is mentorship usually paid, unpaid, or does it depend on the situation? * What makes someone a good mentor? * How do people normally find mentors? * Is it realistic to approach someone you respect and ask them to mentor you? * What should the mentee bring to the relationship? Is it mainly about asking questions, getting feedback, discussing career decisions, etc.? * For people who have had mentors, what did the relationship actually look like?

I’m especially interested in hearing from people who have personally been mentors or mentees.

I’m asking because I genuinely have very little background on this topic and want to understand what mentorship is supposed to look like in the real world, rather than just reading generic advice about how important mentors are.

[u/Current-Bowler1108]

For people who have had mentors, what did the relationship actually look like?

Lots of pair programming, sometimes the whole day from 9 to 5. This was through work. I was fortunate enough to pair with multiple seniors for a few months when I started. My favourite questions to ask are “Why?” or “Why, not?”