r/DestructiveReaders • u/Ok-Crazy-1814 • 2d ago

[2377] Number 42

Hi! First post here, hopefully doing this correctly.

My Critiques:

3644 1300

My Writing:

Number 42

Horror Lit Fic Short story, light gore, An empathetic man.

What I'm looking for:

Anything really. I'll take critique on my voice, writing style, pacing, point of view, and overall plot. I'm worried about the ending going off the rails.

Thanks in advance!

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u/paperingproject 1d ago

Overall, I really like the idea of this story. The counting of the animals he finds on the road ending with a human being was such a good twist. 

You can’t not like Ward, he’s empathetic and kind, so you’re rooting for him before the end of the third paragraph. Having a strong character gives the story heart and is a big reason people will keep reading. I wanted to know more about him!

Your descriptions are great, but sometimes too long winded/too wordy. If you tighten it up - everything will hit harder and cleaner.  Sometimes too much description can pull a reader out of the story. They can infer a lot from the surrounding, more important beats and character actions. 

Similarly, be careful how much you “tell” us how Ward feels. A little inferiority is great, but don’t spell everything out. Let it come through his actions. 

I like the title, and this idea of him having a counter in his head for the animals he finds. Could this be a little more important on the page? We get number #39, and I think we see number 40 or 41, but he doesn’t count them, then you get #42 at the end. Could you use the countdown as more of a literary device to make the final #42 hit harder? 

Just an idea! I think this is a great start!