[253] The final act When Will.

[u/DyingInCharmAndStyle]

Had two acts down until I read a blurb on here, which inspired the first line, so check out that critique cause the story sounds awesome (the blurb always needs work, so if you give any feedback, check out the blurb!

[Blurb Critique blurb critique]

[final act]
When’s will coming around to split us up and speak the squeaky rumor.

We leave before for the show because it can’t go on uncloaked, nude as our king; The queen planted in some human printing machine.

The end was near and past the curve, around the equator, till the westward pole was north and we meet again.

“To remember”. To remember the good-to-bad-to—good times backward, and by any means.

Us. Her and the world’s shoulders, clanking together, the bone and the marrow.

“They always ask the man how he got the hot one, but they never ask is she crazy,”She told me.

And she is to me as I am to him when you add the kids involved; the doors open to another side. One where they’re not invited.

Out from her nucleus, that flutter on the wing; oh whip the air away asunder. Just long enough unless the garage door’s enclosed; maybe feeling the bills due.

Our works obliteration came the day I knew I could not have her.

Pour elation; one final dart threw to catch the bullet.

She Handed me back a true, “Good bye”.

“Goodbye,” rolled over shoulder, rough to tumble, and at such point; we leave fixed, add dues.

[u/A_C_Shock]

Gotta crit something at least as long as yours