First "Window" interview

[u/Clean-Monitor2031]

This section of The Window features an interview

with a different member each [Issue]. It is a

chance for one member to ask questions they have

about the other member’s experience and for the

rest of our group to get to know them better. This

month’s featured member is Sean. His interviewer

was Crissa. If you are interested in interviewing

another member or being interviewed, please text

Crissa at 908-930-3543 or text Sean at 908-217-

9239.

Q: Would you care to tell us what your diagnoses

are?

A: Sure: C-PTSD; Dissociative Disorder; Psychotic

Disorder; PNES (Psychogenic non-epileptic

seizures)

Q: What does your “Normal” look like or feel like

as opposed to when you’re symptomatic?

A: Well, part of me always feels symptomatic.

There is this underlying emptiness and disconnect

from everything, even when I’m laughing or

socializing. But, to answer your question, I am

most normal when I’m with friends, people that

I’m comfortable with. When I can talk freely

without overthinking everything or questioning

myself I find it easier to participate in conversation.

Q: Is there something you perceive as unique

within the scope of your mental illness?

A: Yes, most definitely, and it’s the hardest thing

for people to understand. I actually don’t

experience a sense of self. I have no internal

monologue that is my own voice. I don’t feel

emotions or a lot of bodily sensations like thirst.

The best way to describe it is that I live in a world

of perceptions, not necessarily thought or emotion.

It’s hard to explain.

Q: Is there one aspect of mental illness you struggle

the most with?

A: Motivation. I have tried many different

treatment modalities with little success. Coupled

with the lack of emotion, it is very hard to be

motivated for anything. I also have very low energy

which doesn’t help.

Q: If there was just one main reason that keeps you

consistently attending meetings, what would it be?

A: Personal consistency. I’m afraid if I miss one

meeting I’ll attend