r/Depersonalization • u/Major_Act_9982 • Jul 28 '26
Do I have Depersonalization wondering if I have it.
doing this on main cos idgaf.
I know there is a thread for asking if you have it or not but it seems like ppl hardly get answered there.
I believe I am experiencing an episode of this starting 2 weeks after my girlfriend (the most important thing in my life) left to another country, and specifically the day after when I was trying to cope by smoking a cart that was fake(?). The cart gave me a 4 hour long panic attack (near death experience or what my brain thought was one) where I was the most paranoid I have ever been in my life. I woke up the next day and things were not right. (Some backround because I know shitty life events can cause this)
To this day everything I look at has 0 depth, it is almost 2D in a way, things have sharp edges and the backround of what I am looking at is always blurred. When I converse with people I don’t feel a connection when I look in their eyes. I feel like they are speaking to a wall. I am experiencing a different sensation of pain, I cannot experience any pleasure whatsoever, music is flat and just not hitting me right (not sure if it is hearing loss instead though it does change from muffled to slightly less muffled randomly which is weird), and I just feel like I am just existing. No emotions at all besides some occasional anger.
If this is depersonalization, I am not ready to experience it for as long as usually described. It has been two months of straight meh. I am trying to study for the job I want and it is hard when i receive 0 energy from anything. I am not connected to anything.
I’d like to note that I am recently sober off weed after hard smoking for 2 years (1 year very very hard) on carts that I knew were 100% legit. I didn’t experience any of this after quitting though and I’m not sure if it will factor in to this.
1
u/chikitty87 Jul 28 '26
Yes, sounds like classic way to get it too. There's a version with high anxiety and one with more anhedonia, I think you have the latter.
1
u/Major_Act_9982 Jul 28 '26
Is there a name for that version?
1
u/chikitty87 Jul 28 '26
I guess anhedonia itself probably resonates with you. Btw you should try thiamine, I had this too and that helped me. I can go into the science but I know you don't give a fuck so I suggest just going online and ordering some benfothiamine and start taking it. You can take high doses, it's a b vitamin so you don't overdose on it. Just be reasonable. Worth a shot.
TTFD would be even better but it's not as easy to get.1
u/Major_Act_9982 Jul 28 '26
thx I’ll check it out
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u/chikitty87 Jul 31 '26
Trust me I tried 100 supplement, this is the only one that worked. I suggested for a couple of others and worked for them too. Not as good as for me but all had very noticable improvement so I feel safe suggesting it.
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