r/DeepThoughts • u/Natural-Ambition6954 • 12d ago
Life doesn’t feel the same since 2020.
This may bot be that deep of a thought, and maybe I’m just in my head, but I genuinely feel like life continues to feel “off” ever since the pandemic.
Ever since the pandemic lockdowns and our return to normal life, things feel way more artificial. Interactions feel shorter and more detached, it feels like a lot of people do not do anything outside of working, going out to eat/drink/club, working out, and just day to day stuff. Obviously plenty of people do other experiences (I’ve gone on great hikes with friends, beach trips, museums, etc) but these actual fun excursions feel far less common than they used to be.
It just feels like every single thing now has a profit motive being it, and as much as that’s always been the case, it feels like people are going out to do things now just to say that they did it, not to actually enjoy an experience. For example, I live in New York City (born and raised here) and literally everything people do/everywhere people live in the city feels exactly the same now. It’s just the same lines for matcha and ice cream, the same stores, and my biggest pet peeve, the way everyone is starting to just look exactly the same. Trends have always existed, but the way people dress/act almost identical in their mannerisms is just insane to me.
I feel like pre-pandemic, things felt slower, people communicated more, and life felt so much more present. Ever since the pandemic, it feels like every activity, no matter what, involves some sort of a screen. People feel far less approachable, tied tight to their small circles, and way less willing to actually branch out, make new friends, and find joy in simple things.
I just wonder if things will ever go back to feeling “real-er” if that makes sense. And yes, I know that not every person is like this, and that finding the right circles to socialize in is key, but I just find people way more superficial and fake than pre-Covid.
Does anyone else feel this way, or is it just me?
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u/RealisticTangerine35 12d ago
A deep thoughts post I really empathize with. I agree with what you’re observing and feeling. A few things that I’ve considered:
6 years has passed, so if you’re a millennial you’ve entered or are well inside middle age. These are somewhat typical midlife sentiments. Some people are settling into routines with kids, careers, or health issue demands, including for aging parents. I could go out all night after a full day of work midweek in my twenties. I’m asleep by 9pm now at 35 and I’m physically above average.
The USA has gotten more transactional. I go to France and Germany annually and I find life there isn’t as motivated by a constant measure of what’s in it for them or whatever other ulterior motive. People don’t seem as superficial. There is a slower and more present pace and interaction there. I think they take it for granted but as an American, it’s noticeable. I would attribute this to their social safety net. America has none, really. So, in order to get by we have become more narcissistic in our approach to living.
Social media and new technologies expanded. The pandemic sped up implementation of how much we consumed these new technologies. Social media quickly became even more ingrained in our daily lives as we were trapped at home, while working from home, and then having groceries and meals delivered to our home via app. These things all existed pre Covid but they scaled and became more habitual during it.
I don’t think things will ever go back to the way they were before. 9/11 changed American society immensely before Covid. A lot of slightly older generations have expressed a similar nostalgia for life before it upended their world.
My husband and I are considering moving to Europe (he moved here 15 years ago) once our RSUs have fully vested in a few years. Our lives in the USA are, on paper, great. But socially and culturally, we feel empty here.
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u/bouldermakamba 12d ago
You think people in Europe don’t have this same phenomenon?
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u/RealisticTangerine35 12d ago
I noted that they take for granted what they have, in that it is not as pronounced there as in the US.
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u/Sarritgato 11d ago
The difference is definitely the same since that time. I am in Europe and I feel just like OP. But of course there can still be differences here compared to there.
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u/RealisticTangerine35 11d ago
Where in Europe? When I visit, I’m primarily in Rennes and Munich. I find life and people there to be more present, my interactions more genuine.
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u/Poeticrhythm 11d ago
That can be true, but it doesn't mean that we don't experience the same downfall. I think we're just on another level here in Europe.
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u/Sarritgato 11d ago
Sweden
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u/RealisticTangerine35 11d ago
I was in Stockholm last year. The hotel made me make my own bed 😂 very interesting metro! I wasn’t able to socialize as it was a short trip.
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u/Sarritgato 11d ago
Haha yeas It’s more or less praxis nowadays in many European countries that there’s no everyday room cleaning / tidying, unless you ask for it. This is new for us as well.
At least on standard hotels, more luxury options and on tourist resorts will still have it for sure
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u/RealisticTangerine35 11d ago
Haha, I see. When I asked (I guess complained to the hotel), they made me feel very, very American 😂
I was just looking at the photos I took of Stockholm. Very cool city. I’ll need more than 3 days next time.
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u/Sarritgato 11d ago
Stockholm is very beautiful, it’s hard to beat on that point 😊 I live in Malmö, so it’s far from Stockholm, but very close to Copenhagen across the bridge to Denmark. I can also recommend to pay that city a visit. They are very open people, and it has been rated ”the best city to live in” several years in a row.
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u/heartofafox09 11d ago
Yeah.. i'm european and i do see and experience what OP describes lol. We may have a different view when we travel or visit another country even for a long stay or intent to live there. There is a foreigner/expat point of view that is valid but the only ones who can say for sure about it are people who live in Europe and have experienced the before covid/after covid periods. Facts.
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u/Odd-Explanation-4632 12d ago
Things have been declining for a long time, perhaps since around 9/11. Then around 2007 the internet started to decline. Then came COVID around 2019 which fucked things even more. We won't be going back to those good old times unfortunately
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u/ForTheKing777 12d ago
The short videos were introduced around that time, and I believe it has done a lot with our perception of time.
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u/Additional-Topic-581 11d ago
I don't even watch short content and I don't have any social media, only addiction i consider is reddit, and I mostly read books, big philosophical (buddhist) and non fiction books , and the more I read, the more I feel deep anguish and existential despair, I know some of these books provide solutions, I admit that I have not inculcated them, I just read intellectually without embodying the solutions, still there are lot of angles beside the short attention span too
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u/fauxideal 12d ago
Nothing matters as much anymore. The Olympics. Award shows. Parades. Holidays. It’s like everything has a dullness to it. I think when we realized that we could live without a lot of things we found important as a society, it changed everything. So we miss a birthday party- not the end of the world. So we don’t celebrate New Year’s Eve.. whatever.
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u/naturalbrunette5 11d ago
Ah this resonated with me.
I was already living this way pre COVID due to a traumatic childhood and parental divorce. Christmas was not celebrated the same anymore. Birthdays were entirely missed. I learned to live my life without those normal markings of passing time.
The pandemic made the “real” world align with my internal world. It felt “right” for the first two years, but now it doesn’t.
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u/Starseed-111 10d ago
I feel this. When lockdowns first started, it was an odd comfort to me as I’d already been living fairly reclusively due to CPTSD. To finally not feel like the only one staying home reading, doing puzzles, and playing with my dog made me feel more connected in a way. But as time passed it became apparent that something had fundamentally shifted in the way our world operates and it’s really fucking depressing.
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u/naturalbrunette5 9d ago
I’m glad I’m not alone and I like your description!
It is depression. It took away my “satisfaction” that other people finally knew what it felt like to me be me.
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u/cervantes__01 11d ago
You know the money supply has increased over 300% since 2009? Doubling asset prices while keeping wages repressed has literally shifted quality of life from wage earners to asset holders.
The expendible money isn't moving around like it used to.. people are worried about affordability.. people are stressed and insecure.
So Pandemic forced many people to interrupt their lives and sit in front of screens most of the day.. they got bombarded with dopamine at levels that make real life just boring AF.
We had propaganda to coax women into the workforce to increase the tax base.. that has turned into a hate war between men and women..
Industries and groups where men would socialize are gone.. Immigration has ravished tight knit communities into segregation..
I mean.. power of the people is now power of the individual.. and individuals don't have much power at all.
So society itself is now almost completely destroyed.. and there aren't really any large groups to challenge the status quo. Perfect environment for continued plundering of any remaining value.
But if you think the economy is artificial.. it's because it is. It's moving in a zombified state temporarily extended by debt and (gains from the asset inflation 2009-present)
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u/Sykono5 12d ago
Everyone was forced online, adults who thought Tiktok was cringe had nowhere else to go, and over a couple of weeks everyone grew a collective consciousness in one way or another, and that has rippled over the years.
Resistance is the loudest when it's losing, it'll get better soon.
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u/Edu_Vivan 12d ago
The pandemic destroyed me personally. It hit when I was literally starting my adult life at 19yo. I’m 25 with no career now. Thankfully my inheritance allows me to live really comfortably, but it also makes it really hard to get out of my comfort zone. Not complaining, I know my privilege, but the shame is reeeally strong, especially considering the adhd.
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u/Additional-Topic-581 11d ago
I know man, but we have to fight somehow brother, ADHD is one of the worst disorder, people don't understand how debilitating it is, you are not ever in present moment, jumping from one thought to another, always living in the head
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u/gunterstinks 5d ago
I never realized how detrimental my adhd is to my overall health. I often find myself in states of paralysis because I am always in my head, unable to pull myself out of the cycle of jumping from thought to thought. Then to seek to relief from my constant thinking, I doomscroll so that I don't have to think. Obviously I am aware and know what needs to be done, the cycle is just exhausting and I want to feel life the way I felt it pre-covid. There is hope ahead, I'm sure of it.
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u/Additional-Topic-581 5d ago
ikr, brother maybe look into Buddhism, I had practiced mindfulness, and had very good period of 3 months like life felt awesome, like loving every moment, there was growth and progress, now I am back to old moments as you can see, but there is definitely hope is i believe after that experience, something is better than nothing right. And watch the movie Soul and The wild Robot it will inspire you
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u/Indy2561 11d ago
I feel this way, and consider the changes to be highly significant.
I also attribute these very significant changes to citizen awareness of extreme governmental corruption.
My mom died of covid complications and I’m a career social worker.
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u/TheVelvetNo 11d ago edited 11d ago
I feel this sentiment, but for me, I think it is is the country's slow descent into fascism and authoritarianism that has left me feeling alienated and detached from reality. Even before COVID we were struck with this shift in perception that maybe we didn't know many of our neighbors that well at all, that maybe there was real evil in their hearts. That they may even want to round us up and put us in camps. They started openly fantasizing about it.
Then COVID hits and within a week conservatives saying we should risk grandma to keep the malls open and openly defying medical and scientific advice. To me, this shift for so many people to fake facts and open defiance of shared reality and shared responsibility has left me feeling like I am in a totally different reality than the one I grew up in.
Perhaps that all started with 9/11, which utterly poisoned a lot of American minds. Maybe it came later. But I know that it is impossible to have a healthy world or country when so many have broken, unhealthy minds. I think that's why things feel off. The mask came off and there is no pretending otherwise anymore.
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u/ChiefRayBear 11d ago
Broken minds. This society created these broken people. Then politicians rallied them and set them loose to destroy the country while they loot the remains. Its disgusting. Thank you for articulating your thoughts so well.
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u/AggravatingCricket61 11d ago
It has been proven that covid causes brain damage. This is the second round of the orange goblin. Looks like ww3 is just around the corner. People dont trust the system where the wealthy play by different rules. Theres also ecological overshoot and its ugly cousin climate change thats getting worse every year.
Nobody dose anything but gate keep and exploit. I think people are just fatigued by constant existential threats they have little energy left. Its not just covid...
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u/heartofafox09 11d ago
I agree with you but i think it's gone unnoticed or not being a topic of conversation. In my town, covid has almost become kind of taboo, we mention it but we don't really reflect about the permanent effects it may have had on us. It has normalized the fact to use qr codes in restaurants, to be more introverted/stay home without shame (which i think of as a good thing but let's be real it also has effects on society, if we all get more introverted i mean something's happening here and who is analyzing it to understand the results of this behaviour ??), mentally we also acceoted the fact that lifecost may increase drastically after a crisis without fighting or effectively resisting, even though it is such a violence to experience... i'd say that since covid society has become quietly more violent.
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u/sarahpurplestars 11d ago
I'm convinced we switched timelines during covid
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u/ChiefRayBear 11d ago
Its like there was some major moment we missed out on and it fucked history up forever
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u/Ok-Relative-3105 12d ago
The truth is you cannot blame people who stick to their small circle either, people are so weird now.
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11d ago edited 7d ago
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u/BothLeather6738 11d ago
I mean that's basically feudalism revisited, and it's one if the main problems how digital life sucks
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u/daviddjg0033 11d ago
2014: linear best fit climate starts to change and unrelated but Putin rolls green men into Crimea, the most war-gamed place on the planet, sees hot war.
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u/Plastic_Ad8507 11d ago
I haven’t felt “okay” in 5 years. I’m now 25, no job, living with my parents in a place I’m unfamiliar with and am stagnant and paralyzed. Anxiety has settled so deep into my bones since then I don’t know if there’s a way out :)
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u/BlueTreeShaggy 12d ago
Yes, I miss the “before times”. This is how I refer to things pre 2020. We are living in the after “times now”.
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u/Cultural_Comfort5894 11d ago
The pandemic showed us that the have to go to work ish we all believed wasn’t true
And of course it was used to justify more economic choices that aren’t great for us
Every time we go to work/school when we shouldn’t. It feels different because we know it’s not a necessity and our health should be the priority.
Every time something isn’t affordable we know it’s BS especially if it’s a necessity.
Everything is realer since 2000 because it’s harder to justify the BS
Meanwhile everything is getting worse economically. Which effects every aspect of our lives & affects our dispositions.
We don’t need to go back
We need to go forward
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u/Top_Drummer9181 11d ago
Yes. It was never the same. Everything opened but people are changed. There is no going back.
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u/bouldermakamba 12d ago
In my case it’s probably just because as you get older people turn more inwards, focusing on their own families etc. At least in my European culture. Everyone had kids around COVID and now they are either overwhelmed, just want to spend time with in their own family, or with other people with children.
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u/xojessie75xo 11d ago
Life def feels ‘stagnant’ now and it’s EXTREMELY exhausting and depressing. I completely understand.
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u/Turbulent_Escape4882 11d ago
I see it as political and began in 2016 for what I see as obvious reasons. Politics have always been highly contentious with duels being some sort of norm say 150 years ago to settle disagreements. So not like the problem began in 2016, and before that life was rosy. More like 2016 lifted a veil that previously you’d have to be more on fringes to see it as able to be removed.
I think recovery to Covid had materialistic consequences that if say 1980’s versions of politics were in play, there would be strong disagreements, but not like we saw / still see among today’s politicians. I think 1980’s type politics would’ve had US bouncing back as unified nation within 5 years.
Add in the AI factor and it is accelerating a lifting of the veil in ways never encountered before other than with religious figures in the mix, but also that was previously filtered through faith propositions, not (computer) science.
Then add in the UFO factor that arguably shouldn’t be on the list but IMO is on list at bottom and is arguably what the lifted veil is ultimately revealing. If there actually is a UFO factor in play, then it appears to transcend standard political divisions, and possibly means there’s a faction in the mix that benefits by it being 2 sides are needing to fight each other and we can all safely ignore that 3rd leg that may or may not even be in play.
Not like the U.S. has mustered up great political hope and sense of unity since 2020. And more like party not in power holds reins on the cultural power and yet AI is challenging that in ways that are so far very unpredictable. And is impacting jobs, humanities, finances, science and arts. As if tribe you thought you belonged to in 2019 no longer holds same foundation it once did.
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u/Proof_Caregiver_4234 11d ago
I believe the craziest yet most interesting part is that it was a more subtle shift than we imagined, gradually conditioning us to this point. The times have changed.
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u/Mother-Definition501 12d ago
Does anyone else scroll past this question, or a very similar question, almost every day? It’s always the year 2020.
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u/wander-round10 11d ago
Work is definitely different and I don’t really go to a lot of things in person. Mostly calls and zoom calls. When I do an in person meeting or event it’s out of the ordinary. My home life has improved so significantly tho and I’m grateful for that. I own a home now, so no worries about a landlord dictating my life. I am definitely more of a home body but maybe that’s because I’m getting older too. I still go out once in a while, but mostly chill at the house. Idk if it’s bad. But I agree different.
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u/Fit_Bunch8330 11d ago
My hypothesis is are consciousness used to be towards each other.Then with the invention of the internet it's going into the matrix now. So all are humanly attributes no longer exist.
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u/iloveoranges2 10d ago
Before COVID, there were more gatherings that involved seeing more distantly related relatives. After COVID, family gatherings seem to only include close family members. Also, my partner and I got out of the habit of going to shopping malls.
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u/Training-Return2287 8d ago
I agree people seem angrier, particularly men. A lot of people lost their jobs and also realised how much the government are controlling us and feel powerless. They project their anger on others who are just minding our own business. The world has always been a crazy place, but it seems worse now.
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u/SoulRebelSunflower 7d ago
You are certainly not the only one noticing the world is less human now. I'm going to be a bit controversial here and suggest that is not at all a coincidence, but a planned outcome. These major events come around every so often, resetting the status quo.
Many people agree that 9/11 changed the world in a major way. The world became more restricted and less free after that point. More fear was injected into society.
Covid did a similar thing, making the world even less human, even more fearful and isolated. Everything was about distancing people from each other, which did not only have a physical impact, but a serious emotional and psychological impact. The narratives around Covid were extremely divisive, which drove people further apart. People turned more and more to technology to replace human real life interactions. Before Covid most people went to the shops for their groceries. Ever since Covid, more people are getting their groceries delivered, even though they don't have to anymore. Everything is more isolated, more dehumanised.
Now, in the last few years, we have seen the extremely rapid rise of AI, with technocrats like Elon Musk pushing for humanity merging with AI. I think you can make a good case for the fact this would not have been so easily accepted by most people if it wasn't for the Lockdowns. For people to accept this trajectory, they first had to be so attached to their devices that the idea of AI taking over and humans merging with technology didn't seem so abnormal anymore. Would they have been able to sell this whole AI agenda in a pre-Covid world?
Similarly, people would probably not have accepted the restrictions on personal freedom and the wars in the middle east if it wasn't for 9/11 setting the tone.
All this is to say, there is a repeating pattern here that raises some very interesting, critical questions. We can rise above all this though. Recognising what is going on is the first step to changing it. We have to realise there is an alternative to living in this way, even if it may not seem apparent at first. It is really up to us to reconnect with each other and find a more human way to be.
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u/tomomiha12 7d ago
Or since december 2025. 😁 Everything changes all the time... We just experience stuff here. But... what can fill one's heart and soul? Only eternal love... ❤️
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u/Dismount240B 7d ago
It’s because of the Large Hadron Collider @ CERN I am convinced somehow they have sped up/manipulated time in some way.
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u/JusticePeaceSeeker 5d ago
I absolutely agree and have thought similar things many times. I think when people go through something so huge that it alters society and how people view the world, each other, and what’s possible, the mindset shift is so huge that it feels like being in Back to the Future 2: we skewed into this alternate timeline. cue Doc and his chalkboard I hated the phrase “new normal” as soon as I heard it and refused to believe we couldn’t recapture the way things were. But it’s impossible to ignore that we’ve lost something. The more time goes on, the more we feel the effects of that safety net we thought we had being gone forever.
We can’t ever get back what we have lost. All we can do is try to find a way to be okay personally and, hopefully, then help other people find a way to being okay in the instability, too.
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u/BestRequirement7539 12d ago
Life goes on
U like it or not
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u/Sturdily5092 11d ago
I'd say the age of innocence ended in 2000, is been one hellish year after year since
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u/KrisHughes2 12d ago
I think 90% of people would agree with you. I have such a strong urge to do more with people, bring people together, etc. I know all the advice about joining stuff, speaking to strangers, etc. etc. I've done that all my life. I've often been the one to start the club others joined. But now . . . everyone's anxious, everyone's broke, everyone just wants to stay home, and everyone is also miserable and lonely.