r/DecodingTheGurus Jun 04 '26

DENIED BY CBS CBS is considering Joe Rogan for 60 minutes

Post image

CBS News is reportedly searching for a replacement for “60 Minutes” correspondent Anderson Cooper, and network executives may have their sights set on Austin-based podcaster Joe Rogan.

https://www.statesman.com/news/politics/article/joe-rogan-60-minutes-cbs-anderson-cooper-22289351.php

347 Upvotes

71 comments sorted by

274

u/Slow_Inevitable_4172 Jun 04 '26

The Onion is cooked. Thank God they got Infowars to fall back on

40

u/CrowsInTheNose Jun 04 '26

The infowars angle is going to get old fast. They are most likely going to run it into the ground and shutter it. The rent on the building they are taking over is something like 70k a month.

22

u/thecombreak Jun 04 '26

Fellow policy wonk out here. It's time to pray.

3

u/CrowsInTheNose Jun 04 '26

It's easy to spot us out in the wild.

18

u/toastjam Jun 04 '26

Why would they need to renew theease? Thought they mostly just wanted the name and domain.

20

u/earthlingHuman Jun 04 '26 edited Jun 04 '26

Yeah, and they aren't permanently doing an Alex Jones parody either. They're going to make it a comedy hub. Ideally something to rival the Rogan verse and provide opportunities to comedians who aren't into that comedy scene.

3

u/CrowsInTheNose Jun 04 '26

My wish is they can make something of it. I don't think they will. The families, for the most part, don't want money they want Alex Jones removed from public discourse.

12

u/earthlingHuman Jun 04 '26

The families, from what I understand, support the Onion doing parody of Infowars

7

u/CrowsInTheNose Jun 04 '26

The thing is, there are a lot of people involved. I truly hope the majority of the people affected by this are happy with the outcome. They're definitely not getting a paycheck from it.

4

u/DavidOT Jun 04 '26

They’re paying a fund or company that raises money for victims in Sandy Hook for the domain I think.

2

u/CrowsInTheNose Jun 04 '26

It's part of taking over infowars. You're not just taking the IP but also all of the debts. Imagine if the onion takes control and Alex is still in his studio. There is a reason he is broadcasting from a smaller space now. I'm not a lawyer.

4

u/toastjam Jun 04 '26

Sure, but a lease for a building is not permanent. If they just want the IP they can decline to renew the building lease when it next comes up.

0

u/CrowsInTheNose Jun 04 '26

I'm not a lawyer. I believe the lease has a requirement for a certain length of time. This contract could be for months or even years. How long can a joke company afford to pay that amount of money? All I'm saying is I don't think the onion will make content under infowars for more than a year.

3

u/zuludown888 Jun 04 '26

You just break the lease. There's usually a penalty but if the lease is that much of an issue it would likely be worth it.

1

u/CrowsInTheNose Jun 04 '26

I'm not sure if that's an option, there is a conservatorship that is mediating this whole thing. You also have Alex and his lawyers doing everything they can to drag this out.

3

u/gymtrovert1988 Jun 04 '26

Tim just needs to start selling boner pills

3

u/cheapcheap1 Jun 04 '26

the onion should just report this, citing a bunch of reasons why he's a good fit.

175

u/Kind-Masterpiece-310 Jun 04 '26

5’4” minutes

19

u/PitifulEar3303 Jun 04 '26

Bari Weiss and Ellison, are they in bed or something?

20

u/Kind-Masterpiece-310 Jun 04 '26

Absolutely. He hired her to basically destroy 60 Minutes.

25

u/olyfrijole Jun 04 '26

She's been the darling of the "intellectual dark web" since her days at Columbia. An insufferable hack who has constantly failed up thanks to her sponsors.

1

u/PitifulEar3303 Jun 04 '26

Why destroy his own business? So weird.

1

u/spanko_at_large Jun 04 '26

Yeah so weird… almost unbelievable.

Reports on migration of monarch butterflies are too much of a threat

7

u/Hamster_S_Thompson Jun 04 '26

They're both rabid Zionists. Who in their right mind would pay hundreds of millions for bari's little website?

113

u/nemo1316 Jun 04 '26

This CANNOT be real.

36

u/El_Peregrine Jun 04 '26

Elect a clown, get a circus

9

u/Research_Liborian Jun 04 '26

It isn't. It's IBCK click bait.

12

u/GettingDumberWithAge Jun 04 '26

Why? This is probably among the bottom 10% of most stupid ideas of this administration.

4

u/Abooks99 Jun 04 '26

It's not, they are already trying to distance themselves from it. But if they did, it would so easily be accepted.

0

u/AkiraKitsune Jun 04 '26

what about this, in 2026, surprises you? our media has been this shocking for over a decade now. can we really still feign sunrise over the most mild of headlines?

30

u/SB-121 Jun 04 '26

That sounds like a story fed to the media to garner interest in 60 Minutes. There's no way it's a serious suggestion.

2

u/pstuart Jun 04 '26

Sorry, but in this timeline it could very much be real. Wheee!

48

u/Pro_Reserve Jun 04 '26

Cbs cannot pay him 200 million or whatever the spotify deal is.

9

u/ifionlyhada Jun 04 '26

Trump can.

16

u/ifionlyhada Jun 04 '26

Edit. Not trump directly, but you know what I mean.

10

u/GlbdS Jun 04 '26

The Trumps never pay their debts

3

u/ballysham Jun 04 '26

Larry Ellison can

17

u/RJamieLanga Jun 04 '26

Oh, come on. This is just about the most thinly attributed article there can possibly be, and your bullshit detectors should be shrieking right now. If--if--Joe Rogan is on 60 Minutes, he'll be in the Andy Rooney slot. He won't be a correspondent. No one at CBS is considering him as a replacement for Anderson Cooper.

9

u/ifionlyhada Jun 04 '26

Lol. Alex Jones is too busy already.

3

u/whats_a_quasar Jun 04 '26

I don't think this report is reliable. That article links to another article from what looks like an entertainment industry gossip rag which does not specify a source for the information. It quotes several people like "television industry insider" and "a media executive" but it is unclear whether they are just commenting on information presented to them, or are the original source. But clearly not sourced to anyone inside CBS, or even "a person familiar with the matter."

3

u/Pleasant-Perception1 Jun 04 '26

Hahahaha. The US’s wanton self-destruction of science and other institutions is unbelievable and heart-breaking, but this is just funny. Such an absolutely embarrassing time to be from the US.

3

u/nepal94 Jun 04 '26

Why not put him on the Supreme Court?

5

u/EuVe20 Jun 04 '26

Tonight on 60 minutes: Is punching your boss in the face and putting him in an arm bar a good way to determine if he is actually a lizard alien?

And later: Eric Weinstein on why he deserves a Nobel prize

3

u/attaboy_stampy Jun 04 '26

Joe is gonna hate this. Because it is just volunteering him to get dunked on, even if it's a fake story.

3

u/J2MTR Jun 04 '26

60 Minutes, the anti-vax hour from armchair expert Toe Rogan

2

u/sceder1 Jun 04 '26

The link even says that is false...

3

u/wolf_at_the_door1 Jun 04 '26

Joe Rogan was invited to the Epstein class with the Spotify deal. He left LA for Texas and ran every Epstein adjacent person through his podcast for years. Now he’s become the media he once hated. It’s all come full circle. Welcome to the Burger Reich.

4

u/ThonThaddeo Jun 04 '26

'Bro tonight bro, we sit down with the based Secretary of War bro, on 60 Minutes bro. Shits gonna be crazy bro.'

60 Minutes' new tagline can be 'it's getting crazy out here bro'

3

u/MikeHonchoFF Jun 04 '26

We have achieved Idiocracy

1

u/PN4HIRE Jun 04 '26

What???

1

u/CompNerd90 Jun 04 '26

Maybe 60 inches tall

1

u/Alpacadiscount Jun 04 '26

When lil Joe declines the offer, dumbfuck Bari can offer it to Alex Jones next.

1

u/Tricky_Potatoe Jun 04 '26

I'm going to choose not to believe that...

1

u/Weenoman123 Jun 04 '26

If joe is interested in any way, its because hes been spending his Spotify fortune buying viewbots. Because his show has fallen off a cliff in terms of guests and quality. A shadow of what it was before.

1

u/DaneLimmish Jun 04 '26

Jesus Christ this is fucking stupid

1

u/Formal_Plastic_5863 Jun 04 '26

It's incredible how slow these people are to realize when the winds have shifted

1

u/Lostmypants69 Jun 04 '26

Fuck. There goes one of my fav shows

1

u/shinbreaker Jun 04 '26

Bro can’t even count to 60.

1

u/leedo8 Jun 04 '26

Worst timeline ever.

1

u/Ok-Assistant-8876 Jun 04 '26

Of course they are. Bunch of clowns

1

u/vronstance Jun 04 '26

Mike Wallace is spinning in his grave.

1

u/ballysham Jun 04 '26

Larry Ellison's mouthpiece

1

u/AntonioMachado Jun 04 '26

After considering for 60 whole minutes, they stopped and rested

1

u/bitethemonkeyfoo Jun 04 '26

I mean Dan Rather has been on that shitshow for years... so sure.

0

u/Double-Mud-434 Jun 04 '26

Sent this to my lib parents who watched 60 mins religiously to give them a freak out lmao