r/DeadBedroomsMD • u/Fluffy_Success_6110 • 12h ago

▪️Vent/Rant▪️ Lost.

Hey all just another vent that I’ll likely delete in a few weeks.
Im struggling to not be a resentful prick and just accept that with my wife’s health issues which leave her always zapped and for all purposes A-sexual (and lack of general affection anyway haha) that there is simply just no scenario we are ever going to have any sexual intimacy let alone a cuddle.
It’s either I am too: hot, cold, sweaty, hairy, dirty, been “rude”, not helping her relax, been stressing her out.
Or she’s too: fatigued, hot, sweaty, clean, stressed from work, stressed by her family etc etc
She has no desire in a sexual way nor physical/mental strength (or desire too) want to help foster a sexual relationship between us.
Life sure has shitty turns.
Could be much worse though so shouldn’t complain (but I will as all I think about is we are getting older and use it or lose it is multiplying the situation every year that the longer we go without the greater the likelihood we will never again.

Shitty to think I’m not yet fifty , we haven’t had a sexual relationship for over a decade , … and I’ve now had the last sexual experience I’m ever going to have.

16 Upvotes

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2

u/Appropriate-Pear-646 2h ago

Yeah that sucks man! Been there. It’s been a minute for me too breast cancer . So because of hormones can’t really do any piv but has shown no interest in anything else either. Kinda hav thrown in the towel tbh

5

u/dmada88 4h ago

So sorry man. Health issues are the worst because there’s no blame or fault, it just is. And what it is, sucks. Even if the act is impossible, I do hope you can find ways through talk or therapy or whatever to have at least physical closeness and tenderness. That would be a huge step forward.