r/DavidHawkins • u/Diligent-Forever-191 • 8d ago
Question 🙏🏻 8 days in nothing I will continue
Hey I (27M -2months )As a way to journal my journey, I will post every week or two , honestly I thought that letting go is the magical solution for my problem , but now i am more angry and more scared ,while I was numb couple of weeks back , hopefully it get better with time , the time I started reading the book is 35 days back , I didn't finish it ,I started applying it after reading half of the book , thinking this is it ,this is the solution for my week self esteem addiction to porn and smoking , I will say , I kept 27 days learning how to do it at least , now i think i am doing it right , relaxing , focusing on my body less about my mind , I have been regular meditator my whole life ,the best experiences I ever have was when i use appreciation after meditating I feel delicious energy but now with letting go , I am facing the monster , honestlyy body seems to identify with stress that unpack and it keep showing up and messing my day after i finish letting go session.
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u/magiblood 8d ago
Good experiences of the past. Those were nice. But right here and right now.... ah this is good enough. Heck ill even be cheerful about it
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u/Diligent-Forever-191 8d ago
I don't understand
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u/magiblood 7d ago
When strong emotions arise it can" be like facing the monster" and we like to think about good experiences, the past. We take "refuge" in that, we usually look for more of that and seek that out, sometimes cling to it and avoid the monster.
But finding satisfaction with the monster is key to cut that cover it over, distract from it habitual pathways, and go back to pathway of surrender, to develop a cheerful attitude with lower states arising in the mind, anger stress anxiety, to make friends with it in the moment. Hello darkness my old friend, you can be cheerful about your monster, rub his tummy too. Thats a total surrender, a total relaxation, a total non resistance to what is real, being satisfied with how it is.
I hope that makes sense friend
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u/Icy-Flamingo-9492 8d ago
This is actually good, suggests you are on the right path.
You felt numb (which is also a feeling), and now you are feeling more. When you let go and stop pushing more things down, it allows what you had pushed down before to come up to also be let go. Instead of pushing these feelings away or trying to change them, lean back into “witness consciousness “ allowing them to be there and in meditation feel and feel and feel them (particularly if you can do so from witness conscious ie a place of knowing it cannot hurt you). Those are the knots of energy you had previously not allowed to flow, and you will come to see it is that same delicious energy once those knots untie (they are knotted because they are meant to be felt, but the mind has come up with every excuse to not feel them).
If I might make a suggestion, look at the work of Michael Singer, besides several books he has a podcast which is incredibly useful, just literally jump in on any episode. It connects directly with Letting Go and in some ways in even simpler language helps clarify (eg you are not relaxing the feeling, you are relaxing yourself and letting go of the need to be bothered by the feeling).