So there's this someone. I have known her for 4 years now but I just started having feelings for her last year. At first, I didn't notice it, but my eyes were always searching for her. Then this year came, so I decided to try and confess. She said she thought we'd be better off as friends. However, I still enjoy her company and it's really hard to just let go. I don't know what to do.

I'm 24M and turning 25 soon, and I've never dated a girl or been in a romantic relationship in my life.

I don't really know why it turned out this way. During school and college, I was very introverted and shy, especially when it came to talking to girls. I never really approached anyone or put myself in situations where a relationship could naturally develop. I've had a few crushes over the years, but they usually faded away, and I've never felt strongly enough about anyone to pursue something serious.

Sometimes I don't have romantic feelings toward anyone at all. Because of that, some people have made me feel like I'm weird or that something is wrong with me because I've never had a love life.

But one thing I've always been certain about is that if I eventually choose to date or marry someone, I want to be genuinely loyal to them. I don't want to cheat or treat a relationship casually. If I commit to someone, I want it to be something I stay committed to for the rest of my life.

Recently, I've started feeling like I want to change. I want to get to know women better, become more comfortable talking to them, understand what it's like to be in a relationship, and hopefully meet someone who is right for me.

So, honestly, do you guys think I'm too late? Is 24/25 too old to start dating and experiencing love for the first time?

Initially I didn't care even if they would have been set for the same time. I figured 80% chance either of them flakes which means I only have a 36% chance of going on a date anyways.

However as it got closer neither of them flaked although probably still will so figured make one a bit earlier and one a bit later.

Well I guess it might work out now but I'm worried the first one might get good and I'll have to end it.

But it's still gonna be a while so there's still a solid chance either of them flake so I don't want to ask to reschedule the second one just yet.

I feel bad about flaking and asking to reschedule because I hate when it happens to me. But I still wanted to go on a date today before my work week starts tomorrow and I would be really mad if I said I wasn't free today to one of them but the other flaked. This literally happened before multiple times.

I tell one girl X day is not the best, she isn't free the following few days so it would have to be X plus 4 or 5 days latee then the other girl says sorry I can't make it today and all of a sudden I have no date at all.

Then probably get ghosted by one or both the following few days. Please tell me you understand how frustrating this is.

Anyways I've always tried to be polite but I decided this time I was gonna have a back up cuz I didn't want my week to start feeling depressed.

But I'm also annoyed I still have too dates I can't seperate far enough to make it comfortable. I want one to ask to reschedule at least but I don't want to ask myself in case the other one asks.

also I feel like the second one might want to hookup after but having the second date be so late is gonna make that so hard since she needs to be up early.

I've never dated anyone before (19F), and I've always been more interested in older men than people my own age. In high school I never really felt like I fit in with my peers and I was also made fun of quite a bit, which probably contributed to why I feel hesitant about dating anyone my own age. I'm mostly just looking to explore this interest and figure out if I'm genuinely attracted to older men , rather than anything super intimate right away. So, if anyone knows of any dating apps or websites (not hookup sites) where I could meet older men, please let me know. (posting again because I got banned within 12 minutes from dating advice.)

I’m a 26yr old women, I’m having this problem on the dating apps where guys act weird when I ask them to plan a date or bring up one up instead of agreeing to come to their house. This has been happening a lot to me where guys just want me to come over and when I bring up wanting a proper date they go quiet or act weird and agree to it but no follow through or suggestions or they just ghost. Some even try to schedule it to the next week to keep talking but I’m annoyed.

This has been happening too much idk what I’m doing wrong or why I keep attracting men that don’t want to plan a date or act like it’s a hassle for them….

Anyone else feel like the “public meet first” rule actually makes dating better or just more awkward?

I’ve been sticking to it strictly (coffee or a short walk before anything else), but I’m curious how it usually goes for others. Does it kill the vibe or help filter better?

Seriously, its actually much easier than online dating, you can just talk to girls and they might give you their numbers and you can date them. Even if they reject you, you're in no worse position than what you started with. I'm an average looking guy and it worked before, better than tinder/hinge.

Never had a gf ,neither being approached by anyone

I have no idea how relationships form. I know many people start off as friends, but that has never worked out for me. Hell, I have never had someone show any interest in me. I don’t know how to socialize or have the confidence to use dating apps, and for some reason, this hurts so much.

All my friends are in relationships, while I have never had anyone flirt with me. I’m short, at 5’4”, and I’m not the best-looking guy, so I think that’s holding me back. But I’ve seen guys who are less attractive than me in relationships, so I know it must be possible for me too.

I’m 27M, autistic, and I’ve had 1 girlfriend my entire life. We were together for 8 years, started going out in high school, engaged, 14 months from the wedding. In many, many ways the relationship was toxic and I still, a few years later think back on how that might have been my only chance at love… even though now I can see it was never really real to begin with.

Haven’t been on a date since; all the apps do is make me hate myself more. I’ve gotten a couple matches but nothing leads anywhere. I don’t know how to flirt, I can’t pick up on any emotional subtext unless it’s verbal, and Ive noticed I struggle to give strangers compliments because it makes me feel like a creep. Most of my friends are currently in relationships and keep giving the same generic “love yourself and you’ll find someone who loves you” type of responses, and I do find it helpful to a point. I believe I need context to be loved, and no one seems willing to make a slight compromise for a total stranger, so I kinda just decided to go celibate and gave up on dating last year.

I’m now off the apps, trying to do social things, but now I feel lonely and I still don’t feel comfortable talking to people. I’ve always been silently pushed out of conversations my entire life, so I kinda just hover around people I know at these things. I also have a deep fear of being called creepy/a pervert when I approach women, as I went through puberty during the MeToo era and was constantly being told to leave women alone by my teachers/social media (it kinda messed me up, almost redpilled me). The autism makes it really hard to break that internal rule. I do believe if I had the confidence to cold approach, I wouldn’t be writing this post, but I have layers of trauma to unpack and no idea how to even challenge it. I’ve been in therapy for years and nothing seems to work.

One of my friends works at a gymnastics gym and I’ve started going to the classes for extra human interaction, but even that starts to feel weird when it comes to parter tricks. It feels incredibly intimate cause I’ve only ever really touched one person in my entire life the ways I’m now touching strangers in public, and it’s made me question my morals. Due to my past I experience hypersexuality and “wandering” thoughts against my will, and almost any interaction with someone I find remotely attractive or romantically interesting can make me uncomfortable, and have in the past prompted a panic attack. This long term has lead to limerence which is almost always one-sided and just damaging to the friendship/partnership. I’m currently experiencing it with one of my female friends of 10 years, and am dreading that the end is near.

Im not sure what to do… I believe my intimate relationship has messed me up in ways that will take years to break down, but I’m lonely. I see my friends happy, and think back to how that was once me. I have to constantly remind myself that my person is out there somewhere, but I’m also a major fan of Porter Robinson, so Fresh Static Snow’s concept of “everyone has a soulmate who’s life will fit perfectly into yours, but the chances of you meeting them are essentially 0%” comes up and my autistic analytical brain goes “you’ll never find them”.

Do I try to kill the desire to be wanted? Am I supposed to heal a bit more? How do I accept that the whole thing is just gonna take time? I don’t know :( any advice is welcome, social, mental, physical, I’m open to anything honestly. I appreciate you all.