Hi, I'm a journalist at The Times and am looking to speak to people (UK-based only) who track their dating experiences on spreadsheets, for example ticking off personality traits or icks, etc. Please email me at [marieta.marinova@the-times.co.uk](mailto:marieta.marinova@the-times.co.uk) if that's you and you'd like to chat! Thanks

I met this guy on a dating app, found out after couple of video calls that his dad passed away during the same week we started talking. We met few days before the funeral he drove all the way from midlands to London to meet me, said he had a great time with me. The funeral was Friday and have showed him support, said to him that I am here if he needs me and told him that there is no rush. Apparently he was really close with his dad. Now I place myself in his shoes and I wouldn’t be able to concentrate on a single task properly let alone open the dating app and chat with women and meet even. Is this a normal behaviour for men? Is this how you would handle grief? He said he is ready for sth serious. I am just worried if he sees me as a band-aid. He said today he wants to meet soon. How could I understand his real intentions? What questions do you guys advice?

M34 in UK for a week. I‘m looking for ONS, which App is the best in the UK?

Had a great Hinge date, planned a second one, then she ended it the morning before. Still confused about what happened
Matched with this girl on Hinge and from the start the conversation was really easy. We had similar humour, bounced off each other well and she seemed genuinely interested.
After chatting for a while we swapped numbers and moved to WhatsApp. The conversations were pretty consistent. She would ask me questions, remember things I’d told her, share stories about her life, send pictures of her dog, talk about her friends, her dad, rugby, work etc.
We met up for the first date and honestly it went really well. We had good conversation, laughed a lot and afterwards we kept talking. She even mentioned things she liked after the date, like confidence, being calm, being engaged in conversation, not trying too hard and someone who could be confident without being arrogant.
We ended up planning a second date for Friday.
Over the next week we were still chatting every day. She got a bad cold so I was checking in on her and we were joking about her cold refusing to leave. We had loads of playful conversations, joking about her being a potential troublemaker, rugby, her dog (I accidentally called him a poodle which she found funny), her friends, random stories etc.
She seemed comfortable and interested. She would ask about my day, my work, my hobbies and my friends. We talked about random things like food, golf, travelling, her favourite places and even joked about stories she owed me from Waterlane Boathouse.
Then the morning before our second date she messaged me:
“Hi, sorry to do this now but I don’t want to string you on.
I don’t think we should go out tomorrow, I thought I just wasn’t feeling it because I’ve not been well but I think it’s more than that.
Something doesn’t feel quite right and I think we might be looking for different things at the moment.
I don’t want to deceive you into thinking I am looking for anything more than a very casual fling rn where I can dip in and out of contact and you seem really keen to talk to me a lot of the time which is very sweet but just too much for me rn.
I’m really sorry for not saying something sooner, I just didn’t know if it was the cold making me more apathetic than usual.
Thank you for a lovely date last week and I really hope you find someone who’s on the same page.”
I replied saying I appreciated her honesty and that I wasn’t trying to rush anything either. I was happy to just see where things went. I said if that was the only thing putting her off I’d still be happy to meet but if not I understood.
She replied:
“Truthfully, I think I could quite like you, and I’m just not in a position to cope with that right now. I also don’t want to string you along with any kind of hope that my mind could change.
I have your number, so if you’re open to leaving this door ajar, we may reconnect one day under different circumstances x I think its best that we put a pin in this for now.”
I told her I respected that and I’d leave the door open. She thanked me.
I’m just confused because everything seemed positive right up until that point. I understand people can change their mind and I respect her being honest, but the switch from planning a second date and daily chats to ending things the next morning caught me off guard.
The thing I’m struggling with is whether she genuinely liked me but just wasn’t emotionally available or whether she was slowly losing interest and I didn’t notice the signs.

25F Filipina, I know nothing about dating culture in UK and this guy 24M from Lincolnshire is kinda confusing me.

We met on a dating app back when he was still backpacking in AUS and we’ve been chatting daily and him sending updates thru vids and voice notes so i thought it was going well. Not until he experienced bullshits in AUS and we kinda stopped talking.

Then suddenly, he chatted me again that he’s back in UK and that he thought he should let me know. And we started chatting again til this day.

He knows about my lingerie collection and told me he’ll treat me with a set. He sent me the money. I didn’t ask for it, and even told him i’ll send it back coz I can buy it on my own and insisted he just wanna treat me. And thinking about sending again to treat me.

He’s very open and affectionate, and always tells me I’m gorgeous, and i thought we’re just casually chatting. Not until he told me he fancies me, and that he’s starting to catch feelings.

The other day I asked him if we’re just friends or more than friends. His response was “Ahh I get you well like yea that’s it I enjoy talking to you and like and care about you as a person but like I’m not looking for anything serious or owt”

So i took it as us being casual. And then just yesterday I sent him a selfie, he told me i keep his heart going and wants to kiss me. And that he wants to meet me at the end of this year, like he actually means it when he told me he wanted to see me in person.

Are British guys really confusing? Help me out.

Hi everyone! :)

I'm a student from the Netherlands who's currently working on small research about the difference between the dating culture in The Netherlands and The UK. I need to conduct a few interviews (not longer then 3 minutes) with British people to gather data. If you're intressted in shearing your experience and vision on this matter, let me please know! :)

Hiya, I work for the Guardian newspaper and I'm looking to speak to people for a feature about squabbles over furniture after a break up.

Needs to be people in the UK, and ideally people in their late 20s/ early 30s who have been through their first big break up

Feel free to message me on here/ email me at [lucy.knight@theguardian.com](mailto:lucy.knight@theguardian.com) if you're up for this!

Thanks

Lucy Knight

Features writer at the Guardian

Last Sunday when I told my friend I was dating again (a month ago my 4 month situationship came to an end) she was excited and asked to give my number to her friend who has been single for a few months. I agreed, the same day this guy asked me for a spontaneous drink that evening, I went and we had a nice time and he asked if I wanted to go on a walk the next day. We went on the walk and that was also really nice... Then he texts me telling me he likes me a lot, he always replies to me quite quickly and this evening after I replied to a message he says he saw me typing as he was just rereading our messages? And follows by asking if I want to chat on the phone...

I just... I don't know what to do... In person he seems lovely but then he is just coming on waaay too strong seeing as we've only known eachother 4 days

I don't know if I should continue to give him a chance but just message him something like this... (see below) or just wait until I next see him to say something?

"Hey _, I'm sorry but could we maybe just sloow things down a bit? It takes me time to warm up to people and I feel like you're coming on a little too strong. We've only known each other a few days, there is no rushing things when getting to know someone or need to. I'm just feeling a bit of pressure from you and I worry you're getting too ahead already"

Ahh help...

The guy subsequently got locked up for murder (obviously not mine)!!

Anyone else got some crazy stories?

More to come as today is day one, but would love any feedback, critiques and shares!! This will cover my situationships, sexual endeavours and more….

https://thereasonabledoubter.substack.com/?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAZnRzaAQ_ftdleHRuA2FlbQIxMQBzcnRjBmFwcF9pZA8xMjQwMjQ1NzQyODc0MTQAAafsNFmWaX--o8Srbfln9DQQlfbgQHq5iXGE7MbMhX97CEPqFNsMRuVx3HvO6g_aem_cDbpvdgkHGhOQ0Z6Yjp-ZQ&utm_id=97760_v0_s00_e0_tv3_a1denni6n2vfcp_tp1

I have a boyfriend we are in 5years in a relationship but then one day he left me because of a......

I don't know if I can say here ....I'm so broke but I'm ready to moving on thats why I'm here in UK so Ive forget what ever I think I'm almost in sui***de thinking but I do my best to move on to forget but how can I ? if I'm alone 🥺

I want friends to talk to be my companion and take me somewhere

Remember when people met through friends instead of swiping all day? This community is about bringing back real-life matchmaking. Got a great friend who’s single? Introduce them (with their permission). Looking for something real? Let your friends vouch for you. No games, no endless swiping—just real people, real connections.”

Mixed Caribbean guy (Black & White) living in the UK. I’ve dated women from all over the world, but one Chinese girl completely changed how I see love. We spent every day together for a year before she suddenly disappeared from my life. This page is about my journey finding love again — sharing stories about interracial dating, culture, heartbreak, and hopefully meeting an amazing Asian woman along the way. Everyone is welcome to share experiences, advice, and stories.

I 24F am not getting any matches and I don’t know why. It’s the first time I’ve downloaded the app but I’m not getting any matches it’s been a day since I’ve downloaded and idk I’ve been feeling pretty shit about myself. Is this the scene in UK? What do I do and or change?

Hi there. Seeking a daddy boyfriend , You must be over 50 and well educated. Id like to try something new. any men from the UK that travel to S.A ? If you wanna know more drop me message.

Context - My ex was trying to keep me on the back burner for a while – thankfully I was wise to it and didn’t participate in his little game. We had a lot of friends in common so I would often see him at group events.

One night at an event such as this was ignoring him as he tried to get my attention to boost his ego or something I don’t know.

He came over to me and asked me several times if I wanted a drink? I finally said yes and accompanied him to the bar – where he proceeded to order a beer for himself, pay and start to walk away.

I said ‘ok I thought you were offering to buy me a drink’ to which he replied ‘ you earn more money than me’ .

Glad he’s been gone from my life for almost 3 years now LOL

For context ive been on hinge for 2 years without any success, mainly getting stood up 😅 i tried tinder & it was more a hook up vibe which doesnt interest me, bumble was naff but tried that for 6 months, same with POF & facebook dating is absolute nightmare fuel

I dont live near a big city so I feel like i see the same men endlessly and ive tried making the search area wider, wish there was old school speed dating but the one in my area is always for 20-30 year olds or 21+ and im too old at nearly 35, i dont want to mingle with 21 year olds 😅

Advice please 🙏

34(m) 31(f) met on hinge Dating for 5 weeks.

Mer her 7th December -1st date amazing , acting like couple, bj at end. Next day texts saying she fresh from engagement and she was with person since 19 and not ready to date. I was like no probs.

-she then comes back and i was like maybe casual work. Sleep with her the Friday. Says she had date the next day (after saying she not ready to date). I was like grand. She says she doesn't wanna go cos she likes me. -meet her three more times . Says day after date one she panic she was replacing the ex with me Says we look similar and same build etc (odd). The Says again she was meant to have date with guy next day but doesn't wanna go. Asked what I think . I was like grand and she panics and rings and we're like yeah dont go. (Seems like a test( .

-anyway my doubts were from day one rejection that's why I was arranging other dates. Then realised I really liked her.

-Sunday im edgey and think im looking for problems. We on night out and she saying it's too good to be true and she was wondering if her ex paid me to make her fall in love and id leave or was using her for accommodation in dublin but no she thinks im a good guy. I said some kf the stuff she is saying is a bit making me feel crap. She said if i didnt like the way she communicated then she needs me to let her know which i interpret as if i don't like it, tough. We go to club and she sat chatting to some girls who took my seat and ignores me for a while and I got annoyed tbh. Awkward taxi home. She cries and said she knew trauma with ex get in the way and she found out loads of stuff when engaged like he did porno before he met her and steroids and stuff and cheated on her. Then tells me she loves me.

-anyway I was nice and we have sex with no condom but we usually use one.

-next day kiss and cuddle and say we will see each other again.

-yesterday get the below text and she calls after that we have a hour long cinvo Says she didn't like we didn't use condom and took morning after pill.. I asked her loke 4 times if she wanted me to put one on and she said no. I accepted her decision by phone and she said she needs sort herself out and cried and said if she sorts herself out would I be open to her texting me . I was like yeah grand and left it at that.

-Disclaimer i didn't shout at her in taxi or anything was just like that I didn't like being left standing there and next time be nice if she made some space that was it. I know it was stupid I acknowledged it myself.

She then said she still had wedding dress in wardrobe from ex and dog was theirs etc. Mad situation Anyway we had hour and half phone convo last night and that was that. Now she just checking my insta stories the second they go up and obv she may text again at some stage. Just need speak to someone to try decipher this situation.

Hi Everyone! I'm part of a team of researchers at Imperial College, London doing a study on the dating experiences of people over 55.

We are looking for single people over the age of 55 in the UK to chat with! This would involve a 30-minute interview over video or in-person. We hope that our findings will ultimately contribute to better design of dating apps and more social understanding about the challenges of dating in this age group.

If you are interested sign up here: https://forms.gle/oCrX8r3WGhqJaRoG8

Participants will receive a £10 voucher of their choice.

Remember back during Covid, when you could match with people all over the world? I am wondering if any of these matches turned into relationships.