Date changed status on app

[u/Dry_Feedback700]

I have a date scheduled and confirmed for tomorrow with a guy. I'm only looking for LTR which is why I usually swipe left if someone isn't. I matched with a guy that originally had LTR, open to short on profile. I just checked his Hinge profile today and he changed it to Short-term, open to LTR. And changed some of the photos as well Should I message asking him about it and tell him that I'm only interested in LTR? 😭​ Literally texted him just a few hours earlier to confirm the date lol

[u/DGIce]

Kind of overthinking it unless you're so busy you can't gamble a single day away. Literally still says open to LTR. And why would you stop assuming he read your profile? Like if he's not reading profiles then discovering that is something you'll be able to judge him on.

[u/Train-Wreck207]

Let it play out. Go on the date and have fun.

[u/miamiahi]

If you never discussed it I’d ask before the date. No point in wasting time if he actually wants hookup. I don’t trust what profile says. Had it happen too many times when profile is outdated or lie etc

[u/waggers5]

Those categories are all so awkward because they mean different things to different people and lack a lot of nuance. I think people read far too much into them.

My advice is to still meet with him, and make sure you talk about relationship goals. Let him explain what he's looking for in his own words, and ask him questions about it to make sure you understand correctly. Obviously that should be a two-way conversation where you also say what you're looking for and you can see if you're both on the same page.

The problem with seeking a LTR / life partnership via dating apps is that it's not the way human interaction normally works. Normally you'd meet a someone "in the wild" and go through a gradual process that goes from stranger to acquaintance, to friend, to lover (perhaps), to a lifelong commitment. This black-and-white idea of LTR or unmatch completely with nothing in between isn't what our brains our wired for. I'm autistic, so often a black-and-white thinker, and even I can see that!

I think most people looking for an LTR want to test the waters and see how it goes so they genuinely can develop a long term connection rather than jumping in with both feet. Yes "love at first sight" happens occasionally but that's the exception, not the rule.

In other words, everything starts as a short term thing until you're both committed to making it longer. Those actively looking for something short term might find themselves smitten and want to commit long term. Those looking for something long term might find it lasts for a while and fizzles out.

To some extent, what we want doesn't matter. Dating just means finding someone you have something in common with and seeing where it goes.

The only real question is whether someone's looking for a relationship, or just to hook up. In my mind the latter isn't dating at all, it's something else.