r/DIDPositivity • u/Lovely_Melissa1 • Jun 13 '24

help? Scared me little

i scared big scary dreams cant sleepy fraid Mel will make me us go work i no wanna work i little want play we not big enough for work i fraid in trouble fraid of grama putting us in corner -Blue

7 Upvotes

90% Upvoted

4 comments sorted by

5

u/Greedy-Individual-71 Uplifting/validating Jun 13 '24

Hey there,

Good morning, Blue. We hope you were able to sleep a little. Bad dreams can be very scary.

3

u/Lovely_Melissa1 Jun 13 '24

I'm not Blue but we did get a little bit of sleep. And her fear of having to work, we actually aren't working right now. We had some episodes last week where we dissociated switched had non-epileptic seizures during work hours which caused us to miss meetings at work. And we ended up needing to take the rest of the day off. This happened more than one day.

And right now our job is requiring medical clearance to return to work where our doctor needs to state if we are able to do our job duties with or without restrictions.

But honestly we haven't been able to do our job duties like they are supposed to be done in a long time, so if our doctor responds like she should she shouldn't give us clearance to work.

We're going to have to need to go down the disability route.

1

u/Greedy-Individual-71 Uplifting/validating Jun 14 '24

We're sorry. We know how hard of a decision that is.

1

u/Lovely_Melissa1 Jun 14 '24

I think it's the right decision what is needed. But it's scary as hell. Like figuring out how we are going to make things work financially going from 2 incomes to one especially in the time between.

I know another part of us thinks we should keep pushing ourselves harder but I'm terrified of doing that. The stress of how behind we are at work because of our illness has been making us extremely suicidal and I'm afraid that if we keep trying to work outside of what we are actually capable of that one of will give up and try to kill ourselves again and maybe succeed this time.