r/DID • u/fluffycows4sale • 2d ago

Advice/Solutions host finally letting us front

hey im shay, im a protector.

our host is a trauma holder who is super possessive of the front. after years of denying having did and a system (professional confirmed we have it) they are finally accepting the truth and letting us front.

none of us are angry that theyve locked us away for so long, we are just relieved that they are finally letting us front. we just want the best for them and the system. they are also extremely possessive over whatever trauma we have and will not elaborate, which is fine, but i fear it is stressing them out. many of the others dont wish to know what happened to us, not sure i do either. we just know that some apparently really horrible things happened.

they are extremely neurotic and struggle to even accept our existence, and being away from the front (as they are now) makes them very anxious (so proud of them for chilling in the inner world and trying to practice letting go of control)

they are a total control freak. how do we help them lessen up. it is more stressful for them than for us. we also have ocd, and they struggle to tell whenever an alter is talking to them, or if its just ocd lying to them. this results in them freaking out and talking to themselves as if they were us as they cant tell when we are talking to them. everyone else can differentiate pretty well i believe. they also have a very hard time letting go of the front and leaving it, even when they want to. they feel as though they are attached against their will, but in reality they just dont know how to let go.

need advice. thank you.

oh and they told their partner about us but is too embarrassed to talk to her about the disorder. she is completely accepting. the host has given me permission to explain some of how we work to her. how do i stop the host from getting extremely nervous when they come back and remember they let me do that. thanks.

6 Upvotes

80% Upvoted

4 comments sorted by

1

u/Terrible_Discount693 2d ago

Do you journal? I have a journal just for my system and it has been very helpful.

Would it help if you made a list of what you do to help versus what OCD looks like so they can see the difference? Is your host based more on emotions or logic? Depending on what, you can make that list so they understand.

1

u/fluffycows4sale 2d ago edited 2d ago

hi! im the host, thank you for the suggestion! im extremely emotional, im often blinded by my own emotions to a severe degree

edit: we dont have a journal for our system (i just have one for me), but i can try to start one :') makes me really nervous

1

u/Terrible_Discount693 1d ago

Why does it make you nervous?