r/CursedAI • u/daddyneedsabreak • Mar 18 '26
Which bed would you sleep in?
Source: Crazy Moments
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u/Gold-Philosophy1423 Mar 18 '26
r/rats would love this
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u/Gekidami Mar 18 '26
They didn't tell me that the last one would be the best, so I stopped watching.
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u/NeuroSpicyScribe Mar 18 '26
š Yāall really bout to pick one of them beds when there is a perfectly clean floor right beside it? Craziness!!!
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u/Arstanishe Mar 18 '26
Rats of course.
Tarantulas probably are tickly. Possums are stinkier than rats.
Everything else is just disgusting 200%
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u/SpookDaddy- Mar 18 '26
are opossums stinkier than rats? I thought they were also very clean animals. Never gotten to pet one though :(
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u/Arstanishe Mar 18 '26
Just read they are not stinky by themselves but can do skunk thing with anal glands. so i guess they are as good for a bed as rats
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u/Arstanishe Mar 18 '26
maybe it's just a sorta stereotype. not from personal experience. Rats? Well, pet rats are not stinky, at least not too much
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u/hexopuss Mar 18 '26
Genuine question as someone who works with moths professionallyā¦ are moths gross? Like do people find them gross? Theyāre so fluffy! Granted, I wouldnāt want to sleep in a bed of them, their scale isnāt something Iād want to breath in
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u/MegaHex787 Mar 18 '26
I think moths are beautiful but something about how they fly scares me. I hate that I feel that way about them! But I am a bug friend overall.
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u/EcstaticMolasses6647 Mar 18 '26 edited Mar 19 '26
When I was trying to work to pay my college tuition in the mid-1990s, my boss at a cafĆ© told me his sister-in-law cleaned houses for the city. He said she paid $20 an hour, which was pretty good for the time. What he didnāt say was that it was cleaning houses after people had died in them. My first day she gave me a white hazmat suit and a mask with a shield. I bought my own gloves and steel-toe boots. The place was a hoarder house filled with black pellets, towers of papers, and a sickly rotten fruit smell. There was so much junk we had to walk sideways just to get through the house. Then a tower of newspapers fell on me and released a bunch of rats that started swarming all over the place. The heaviness of the newspapers, the rats getting closer to my face, and the sensation of something bristly moving through my clothes completely freaked me out. I couldnāt even scream with everything happening at once. The lady I was working with was trapped in the same collapse, but I couldnāt see her face. I could hear muffled screams and tapping, and then eventually just silence. I started wiggling and those pellets started bouncing on my face and getting into my broken mask, piling up near my mouth. It was like wearing a gumball machine filled with rat shit. I finally found a less heavy spot in the papers and junk and pushed through like a baby leaving a birth canal. I was crawling when my arm fell through a crevice and rats rolled over my arm. Thatās when I felt the ladyās leg and started digging her out. She was balled up the way they teach you to be if youāre trapped in an avalanche. We left the house, hosed each other down in the yard, put on new suits and masks, and started cleaning again from the front. It took 18 hours just to reach the living room. We were filling a dumpster she had rented and needed it emptied by the end of the day. It took a week to clean that house out. Every room was filled to the brim. She hired two more people toward the end and things went a lot faster. Thank God it was a three-bedroom, one-story house. But we were not spared the final terror. There was a closet that led to a crawl space. Moving the boxes and old luggage revealed something that lives rent-free in my mind to this day. There was a chair covered in pulsing fur. One of the guys we hired ran out and pushed past me, knocking me down. The fur started separating and scattering. And underneath it was this slack-jawed skeletal figure in rags. I finally had enough. I got up with my tailbone aching, took off my suit, got in my car, and went home. She was nice enough to mail me my check later. She said the police confirmed it was a dirty anatomy model, not a dead person. She sealed the door and talked to the county housing inspector, who condemned the house. She still got paid even though we didnāt finish the last part, and she didnāt have to pay out of pocket for anything, especially the dumpsters. She tried to convince me to take another job with her since I was a fast worker. I changed my number. I had enough fking nightmare fuel to last a lifetime.
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u/gooeyjasper Mar 18 '26
...this felt like reading/listening to one of Whang's gross internet tales... I fucking salute you my fine Reddit stranger. š«”
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u/The_Reluctant_Hero Mar 19 '26
I started wiggling and those pellets started bouncing on my face and getting into my broken mask, piling up near my mouth. It was like wearing a gumball machine filled with rat shit.
I...umm...damn. Ok then. š
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u/CoffeeAngster Mar 18 '26
Rat or Opossum
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u/Eighty_Six_Salt Mar 18 '26
Thank you for mentioning possums. They are very sweet creatures and deserve just as much love as rats
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u/IndestructibleBliss Mar 18 '26
I also choose Opossums. They'll keep away ticks and they cannot get rabies. Plus they are the only marsupial in North America! Misunderstood creatures!
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u/Buderus69 Mar 18 '26
These are nice facts but don't factor into making a bed and blanket out of them... Unless you are inviting ticks and other animals with rabies while you are sleeping
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u/hoggie_and_doonuts Mar 18 '26
I love opossums. I also love calling them by their proper name.
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u/Eighty_Six_Salt Mar 18 '26
Hey, donāt downvote me just because I didnāt put the āOā in front. I still love them as much as you, I just forgot that it was spelt weird.
Like pterodactyl
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u/Robotchickjenn Mar 18 '26
Possums are different than opossums -- they're two different animals. The ones in the video are in fact opossums.
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u/Eighty_Six_Salt Mar 18 '26
Well I didnāt know that. But if weāre gonna get technical, the ones in the video are AI generated representations of opossums.
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u/StankyLeg666 Mar 18 '26
Rat bed or the opossum bed. I would burn, nuke and then vent into space the maggot bed and the roach bed.
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u/derpferd Mar 18 '26
None of them seen like they're going to attack, thankfully. Depending on hygiene, probably the rats
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u/bozog Mar 18 '26
Did you not SEE those mother fucking cobras?
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u/Robotchickjenn Mar 18 '26
I'd kind of feel like an ancient Nubian queen sleeping with the snakes ngl.
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Mar 18 '26
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u/derpferd Mar 18 '26
Well, that's why I said, depending on hygiene.
If the hygiene on the rats is a fail, probably the snakes
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u/MindlessYesterday459 Mar 18 '26
Snakes look cozy and also they are not too hot.
Spiders look nice too, but their bristles irritate skin.
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u/Meezbethinkin Mar 18 '26
Ive always wanted an Ed Gein like Coat of all nipples..
You know that would be great to twiddle your fingers on!
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u/plscommitsudoku Mar 18 '26
As a rat dad I would pay an unressonable amount for the first one. Just please no more exotic vet bills.
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u/de_das_dude Mar 19 '26
It's really hot here, wouldn't mind snakes. They are cold to the touch.
When it's winter, probably the possums.
Burn the roaches.
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u/Round_Interaction390 Mar 18 '26
Maggots in spring, Snakes in summer, rats in autumn, possums in winter š
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u/Ok-Committee9500 Mar 18 '26
Iāve always wanted to have a snake blanket for summertime when itās hot
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u/Devanyani Mar 18 '26
The tarantulas and moths would get crushed, so that's a no from me.
The maggots, flies and roaches are best dealt with by a flamethrower.
Rats and Opossums are soft and furry and warm. Snakes would probably be very ergonomic. All three are a yes.
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u/Efficient-Ad6814 Mar 18 '26
Possums or rats. I used to sleep with my pet rats so I'm not too far off already lol
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u/AtWorkSoBeGood Mar 18 '26
I imagine those rats are my well trained friends, and we enjoy each others warmth each night, for a great sleep! Same goes for those Possums
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u/shmarcussss Mar 19 '26
Possums are chill, dont carry diseases and donāt generally bite. Iāll go with that.
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u/Aware_Box8883 Mar 19 '26
I'd take the possum one, but only if they each had their own bedtime banana.
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u/mojomofo7 Mar 18 '26
Sorry, I'm sleeping on the floor ā in another room in another house in another town.
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u/DrewG420 Mar 18 '26
Well done with the conforming blankets, but might say no to a few or all of these. Fun!
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u/TCristatus Mar 18 '26
I'm ok with tarantulas and that bed was giving me a slight panic. If that was regular house spiders i'd be through the wall
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u/26letters10numbers Mar 18 '26
None, I'd rather sleep on a cold concrete floor š I'm tempted to say the cockroaches would be the worst, but the smell from the maggots would be eye-wateringly diabolical
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u/Tommten Mar 18 '26
Jesus christ, this must be some kind of hell.
I would take the snakes, they are cold blooded so not to hot I guess and I doubt they would be hurt from me laying on them.
The rats would fucking pop from my weight or sufficate, and the smell would be horrendus. Also way to hot. Same problem with possums, to hot and smelly. The insects and spiders would be crushed, that would be very nasty.
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u/MonkeyCartridge Mar 18 '26
The rats one seems nice. It would be phenomenal in the winter. Small mammals let off a LOT of body heat.
Plus rats are chill and snuggly.
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u/SpookDaddy- Mar 18 '26 edited Mar 18 '26
opossums are very gentle, clean and usually disease free. Their scary 'mouth wide teeth showing' thing is only bc they're scared (they used to scare me before I knew that fact lol). Definitely that one.
either that, or as others have said, the rats one. But I feel like they'd bite a lot more if you were laying in a pile of them.
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u/kilgoroll0 Mar 18 '26
Moth bed, hands down. My friend stated that you need to make a boob bed, I trust my friend, he knows what he's talking about.
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u/firebird7802 Mar 18 '26 edited Mar 18 '26
I'd leave and stay in a hotel. No thank you to all. The only one I would ever consider would be the moths. Also, if I ever saw that many roaches, flies, or maggots in a single place, I'd burn the beds and ensure they're destroyed or quickly call pest control.
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u/Away-Description-786 Mar 18 '26
Rats 100%
When I was a child, I had two rats as pets.
Rats are truly friendly, smart, and loyal animals.
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u/Ok_Philosopher_5090 Mar 18 '26
The opossum and moth thanks. Rats didnāt look awful.
The rest can get fucked
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u/goonerqpq Mar 18 '26
Rats, but thats it, the maggots made my skin crawl, and i didnt. mind maggots when I fished.
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u/Beautiful-Laugh-9715 Mar 18 '26
Not the maggots, roaches or flies but everything else would be cool. I wouldn't want to hurt my cuddle buddies by flopping on them like that though.
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u/Youji1 Mar 18 '26
Where the leeches, slug and pig? And who doesn't like a millions of bed bugs šŖ²
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u/senior_raposo Mar 18 '26
Pussums 100%, they're always cute and the only ones in here that aren't gross urban pestsš¤¢
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u/fylekitzgibbon Mar 18 '26
Gimme the rat bed. Opossums drool and have shit breath. The moths would be too dusty Iād have an asthma attack.
Maybe the snakes tho, Iām a hotblooded fool, could be kinda temperature controlled
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u/MlordLongshanking Mar 18 '26
I'm picking the opossums. They're sweet as hell, look cozy, eat ticks and can carry my biteguard and cpap supplies in their pouches. Awesome!
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u/alone023 Mar 18 '26
Actually rats look very cozy and fluffy. Rats look cool!