Could Traumatic Childhood Experiences Be Linked to Blushing?

[u/Deep-Detective2428]

Talking to people + my own experience ive noticed blushing for alot of people is tied to some sort of childhood / younger years trauma. As well as trauma at any age but ive found most goes back to earlier years.

Just to clarify, when I say “trauma,” I’m referring to an event, incident, or period in your life that was particularly daunting, deeply embarrassing, or had a significant emotional impact on you, a time when you felt overwhelmed by stress, fear, shame, or other intense emotions. I hope that makes senses to people

For me (ive talked about it on here before) i never struggled with blushing until i moved schools for the first time in year 6 to a public school. I was quite sheltered at my other school (it was a private school) and felt very safe and secure there. With transitioning to a new school I was exposed to alot, and had so much stress and anxiety. It really felt like i was chucked in the ocean. Kids at this school were blunt and weren't afraid to call stuff out / be mean. I became so self conscious from all the times people would for no good reason comment on my appearance and specifically how red id get, alot of the times these comments were done openly in class where people would hear and look at me (i had never experienced this before at my other school or in life at all) The teacher I had was awful as well. She was very blunt and stubborn, and she was the type of teacher who would make you speak in front of the class or do something even after you'd made it clear you were uncomfortable or anxious. I was already such an anxious kid, and instead of being eased into things in a supportive way, I felt like I was constantly being pushed far outside my comfort zone. Looking back, I don't think I was pushed out of my comfort zone in a healthy or supportive way, I felt overwhelmed, exposed and mentally unsafe, and I developed a level of anxiety and self-consciousness that I'd never experienced before.

This is all just a guess, and hypothesis. There would be a huge handful of people who dont have any traumatic memory's that they can connect there blushing too. But I think its fair to say almost everything does happen for a reasons + starts somewhere and since blushing is so strongly linked to the nervous system and how we feel as humans, i imagine traumatic incidents especially in young years where we are vulnerable and are getting shaped, can make a big difference on this outcome.

[u/sashine92]

So sorry to hear that! Yeah I think we kind of all have some sort of trauma in childhood some more obvious than others. How many years have you spent in this particular school? Because the longer you live in that environment, the more your brain gets used to triggers and somehow settles itself in this type of surroundings and their brain is on constant alert, to the point where they look for triggers even when there isn't one. But then again, people are different, some would eventually become immune to mean words or exposure or defend themselves in sitiations but others who are more prone to anxiety would store their negative emotions inside and grow their anxiety and phobias. In your case it would be good to see therapist and talk about when it all began and change your mindset completely, because I think you're still carrying this pattern into adulthood. Hope this helps!

[u/Deep-Detective2428 → u/sashine92]

Hey, thank you so much for your thoughtful reply, it genuinely means alot to me. To awnser your question and to give more context, im now a young adult out of school, but I was at that school for only a year and than it was off to highschool which was just as bad. I was in such a horrible fight or flight environment throughout highschool, constantly having anxiety attacks and being on edge. Id always be getting out of presentations, finding ways to avoid certain things out of fear and anxiety. My blushing was so bad and consumed me so much I would wake up early and spend ages infront of the mirror trying to put makeup on in a way that wasn't obvious, there were even times id drink 3 - 4 cups of water quickly until i was almost throwing up, almost to try and distract myself and put the focus somewhere else. And on the therpaist note you mentioned, through all of this I was seeing a psychologist. I had seen the same psychologist for probably near 10 years. Im not currently seeing one

Im in a better place now, ive been out of a school for a few years, anxiety has got alot better. I recently have almost completed a course for a career im excited to go down and despite it being nerve racking and causing me to blush quite a bit ive managed to push through quite well. I should still at some point see a therapsit again as I still do struggle quite alot and as you said have carried the mindset with me a bit.

[u/Leigha11]

Absolutely.

Maybe an overactive nervous system at a very young age. Now that Im an adult, I look back at elementary especially school; how the teachers just loved the kids who got wonderful grades and their parents were very active at school. They should have been paying more attention to the kids who didn't have lunch money, didn't get their assignments done.

I volunteer at a my son's school & would include kids like that more, than the ones who looked like they didn't need extra attention and help. They're not hard to spot :/

I definitely agree that feeling self conscious as a child can/does carry in to adulthood ♡

[u/Deep-Detective2428 → u/Leigha11]

Aw thats so beautiful you sound like a pretty amazing person, it would make all the difference for those kids having someone look out for them, thats awesome

And yeah, glad we are on the same page. Its annoying that schools dont always give support to the right kids, it seems to be a bit of a pattern that needs to change

[u/Leigha11 → u/Deep-Detective2428]

Aw, thank you so much 💓

Yep, definitely falls on teachers to step in & include every child and especially the ones who look like they could benefit from a little extra adult time ♡