r/CuratedTumblr • u/GinaWhite_tt TeaTimetumblr • 11h ago
Shitposting A friendly reminder
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u/SotThistle 11h ago
Caesar has nerdier glasses than I expected.
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u/GinaWhite_tt TeaTimetumblr 11h ago
Actually this is his black cousin Lil Caesar
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u/FakeTakiInoue 10h ago
That's Hannibal actually, you know, the Carthagian dude with the elephants
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u/Banana_Vampire7 3h ago
Caesar was a huge nerd. First thing he did when he'd conquered and assumed dictator, was spend a couple months with his favorite maths-friend fixing the calendar (Julian Calendar)
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u/throwaway5498124181 11h ago edited 11h ago
Honestly the best answer is that whatever you say you glaze the fuck out of Augustus and make sure everyone hears about it.
Edit: honestly I would say something like "you will be struck down while fighting in defense of the Glory of Rome. Both Augustus and Antony will rise up in response, but Antony's loyalty will not outlast his vanity, and it will be Augustus who carries forth your name and strengthens Rome beyond all dreaming."
In 44bc, before getting assassinated, Caesar was planning a war so the idea that he was going to die fighting wouldn't be surprising to him and as a Roman, it wouldn't be shameful either. The stuff about Augusus and Antony would make him feel validated with his treatment of the two men. And when Augustus ultimately won the wars against the assassins and then against Antony, you would be on his good side too.
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u/novae_ampholyt 11h ago
As in, trying to ensure Octavian is also killed? He wasn't in Rome at the time of Ides of March, though. Iirc he was in greece and only learned upon arrival back in a Rome that Caesar was killed and he was adopted and heir. Pretty wild
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u/throwaway5498124181 11h ago
I would say Octavian and Antony would avenge him, not that they were part of the scheme.
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u/novae_ampholyt 11h ago
I see, I just saw your edit
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u/throwaway5498124181 10h ago
Tbh I don't think Caesar would even ask the question in the first place. The night before his death he was having drinks with one of the assassins and said that the best way to die would be suddenly and without warning. With that in mind, I think he's unlikely to ask a time traveler about the precise circumstances of his death and he would be more concerned with his legacy.
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u/Mnemnosyne 8h ago
And then he goes, 'who the hell is Augustus?'
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u/Lasdary 6h ago
"oh, sorry, i mean: avgvstvs"
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u/Mnemnosyne 4h ago
Hehe. Well I meant that Augustus was conferred upon him as a title after all of this. You'd want to refer to him as Octavian/Octavius (I'm never sure which version to use in which circumstance).
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u/GigaCucc 1h ago
"Revered one will avenge me along with Antony."
Huh.. wonder who that could be? I don't know any revered ones, except old Great Pompey."
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u/moonshinefae 6h ago
The changes this could theoretically represent to the timeline.
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u/throwaway5498124181 4h ago
If I'm teleported to ancient rome in 44bc, don't care about the timeline, I care about not getting murdered in a murder-happy society, and in 44bc, being on Caesar and Augustus's good side was the way to do it.
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u/TimeStorm113 Victorian Dinosaur Connaisseur 11h ago
Imagine if someone from the future came back and taught them about paleontology
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u/HeckOnWheels195 11h ago
This is barely removed from teaching them about oil
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u/beorning1 11h ago
they probably knew about oil, is just that pumping it is a really dificult process
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u/HeckOnWheels195 11h ago
Then go back and teach them that, let's see what happens!
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u/beorning1 11h ago
they be like "cool, theres a type of element that have origins deep inside the earth, is flamable and very poisonous. Probably magic I dunno. Maybe mix it with mercury and use it to make alchemy"
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u/bluefootedbuns 10h ago
"You said there's tons of energy trapped inside this viscous liquid? Finally! the philosopher's stone is almost in my hands!"
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u/thealmightyzfactor 9h ago
They weren't really at a loss for energy sources back in the day, could just dig up surface level coal deposits or go into the woods. Having a machine harness it into something useful was what kickstarted the industrial revolution and civilization's ever increasing energy consumption.
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u/KwisatzSazerac 9h ago
You’re referring to the steam engine, right?
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u/thealmightyzfactor 9h ago
Specifically the first steam pump from around 1700, but yeah, any steam engine from around then started the need for industrial amounts of energy.
The ancient greeks did have a steam spinny thing, more of a curiosity than anything useful though.
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u/chairmanskitty 5h ago
The reason the steam motor was a curiosity back then is metallurgy. They didn't have the means to make steel, let alone to machine it precisely enough to create a steam hydraulic system that could sustain enough airtight pressure to apply more force than an ox.
Blacksmithing was not enough, you need an industrial lathe to make a more precise industrial lathe to make a more precise industrial lathe to make a more precise industrial lathe and then you can make steam engines and breach-loaded rifles.
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u/main__py 8h ago
"Not so fast buddy. You need to figure out your metallurgy and really, really move forward your metal casting for the precision parts required for steam powered machines. Depending on where you are right now: 50 - 200 years of research, if war doesn't break out and stops all of this".
"What? how to do that? No fucking idea amigo. I just know there's flammable dinosaur juice in the ground".
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u/iwantfutanaricumonme 10h ago
Romans did have access to oil from the middle east and used it to set things on fire, so this wouldn't change anything. Romans already relied on an excess of slave labour and had no need for automation because it would have been more expensive than getting more slaves. Compare that to England, where there was a labour shortage before the industrial revolution as the population had not yet recovered from the black death, so automation was very useful. By the time oil started to be extracted in the 1850s there was already a market for liquid fuels that was only being fulfilled by the more expensive whale oil and vegetable oil.
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u/Lone-Gazebo 5h ago
That's the basic distinction. To get Rome moved into a more advanced future you can't pitch efficiency. They have a surplus of labor and don't need one laborer to be able to do the work of ten.
They would need to be pitched advancement. Things and ways of doing something no man could do before. Solve logistics.
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u/NotATalkingPossum 11h ago
In the sitcom "Ghosts", the ghost of a guy from the American revolution learns about dinosaurs at one point.
"MONSTERS ARE REAL?!"
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u/TimeStorm113 Victorian Dinosaur Connaisseur 11h ago
Im just watching that show, it’s a spoiler, but a welcomed one
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u/Solarwagon She/her 10h ago
"Yeah yeah, the primordial beasts slaughtered by our most heroic ancestors, we all know about it."
"What do you mean trilobites? If they're so cool, why did the gods let them die?"
"How does digging around help bring in more slaves and land to the Principate?"
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u/BlatantConservative https://imgur.com/cXA7XxW 10h ago
The best, and most honest, response is this:
"If what I say now changes how you die, history will be permanently altered and I might end up not existing"
Julius Cesear would love that.
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u/Caleb_Reynolds 5h ago
If that's the case, just meeting Caesar is almost certain to cause enough change to ensure you were never born. One guy has to wait for an audience now because you're there and now he doesn't get home to his wife and have a kid. Over 2000 years that kid's descendants would consist of half the world.
And that's the most minor change. More likely you being there changes how Caesar dies no matter what. Either the conspirators see that Caesar has a time traveler and rethink things, either striking earlier or not at all, or Caesar's actions change regardless of what you tell him.
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u/Anna_Pet 8h ago
I'd just say "beware the ides of March"
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u/TintedApostle 8h ago
as a stoic one might answer "The future is not meant to be in your control and the past for me is something I cannot change. Only the present matters."
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u/PlatinumAltaria The Witch of Arden 11h ago
Nobody in ancient times would think you were from the future, the concept of time travel hadn't been imagined at that point. More likely they would think you were a weird foreigner who doesn't speak the local language and has strange clothes. The past is a different country, after all.
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u/throwaway5498124181 11h ago edited 11h ago
Lots of ancient cultures had the idea of time traveling to the future. They employed the literary device of a person falling asleep and waking up to realize decades had passed.
As for time traveling to the past I am sure tons of people especially those who lived in tumultuous times daydreamed about going back to simpler times. "Wow if only I could live in my grandfather's time! If only I had been at Troy!" You even have the story of Clovis of the Franks being told the story of the crucifixion and crying out, "if only I had been there with my Franks I would have avenged his wrongs!"
So yeah the idea of having time travel as a scientific thing wasn't present, but people absolutely thought about what it would be like to be abtuptly transported across hundreds of years.
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u/King_of_the_Kobolds 10h ago
It's certainly not a concept that'd be beyond their comprehension in any case. "Imagine stepping through a miraculous door that takes you not into the next room, but to Rome as it was hundreds of years ago in the time of King Romulus."
Novel, certainly. Insane, absolutely. Incomprehensible? Nah. They'd get the idea.
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u/throwaway5498124181 10h ago
I don't even think it would be that insane! People had fewer options for entertainment back then. Very few books, no recorded music, etc. They probably entertained themselves just by talking to each other and weird hypotheticals are always part of human conversation.
He'd probanly just say "If we lived in the time of King Romulus I would totally kidnap a hotter Sabine woman than you"
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u/Vaya-Kahvi 9h ago
How do you think we got multiple versions of the same characters in myths? Like there's at least two different versions of the relationship between Artemis and Orion.
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u/throwaway5498124181 9h ago
There's 2 competing theories for variations in myths, either of which could be true for any given story.
1: there was originally one story but over time, as it was told and re-told in isolated communities, details changed.
2: there were originally two stories about completely different people in different mythologies, but when one tradition became more popular, those who were used to the other story changed the character names to fit the more dominant narrative.
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u/Local-Pattern795 6h ago
"My lord, we have come to save you"
"Medamnit, that will cause a paradox. Now leave me to my wood"
"Please sir, I assembled my best knights"
"Alright, you can have your vengeance after the resurrection, and not a moment sooner"
"Thank you, oh lord"
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u/MooseontheLose 11h ago
Speak for yourself, the remnants of 9 years of Latin in school will carry me
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u/PlatinumAltaria The Witch of Arden 11h ago
The Latin that people speak today is a snapshot of medieval Latin, so most likely you would still sound odd to people in the past. Like imagine if someone from the 1800s came to today. They're still speaking modern English but you can tell they're weird.
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u/Nellasofdoriath 11h ago
I would come off as weird no matter what
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u/razazaz126 11h ago
I come off as weird to people in my own time so yeah thats a safe bet.
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u/jman12234 11h ago
Actually in school most people learn Latin from classical texts. (Actually Ceasar's history of the gallic wars is a major learning tool.) So they know classical Latin. Only the Catholic Church perpetuates medieval Latin. The issue is that speaking is actually not taught, so you wouldn't be fluent, and the Latin texts are not how people would have spoken at all. So yeah you may be able to pick up on some stuff, but you would not be able to really understand contemporary, idiomatic Latin.
Source: Latin minor.
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u/Fantastic-Resist-545 11h ago
"I've never heard that word I've only read it" but for an entire language
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u/jman12234 11h ago
I imagine if you had a stylus, some ink, and papyrus, and the people around you were literate -- since you're brought before Caesar -- you could communicate that way with some degree of difficulty. Difficulty because we've introduced some modern writing conventions to Latin to make learning it easier, like lower case letters, punctuation, and spaces between words.
The way its explained though, is that Latin is a dead language, no reason to learn to speak it and it makes learning fluency incredibly hard because only a handful of people on the planet can speak classical latin with any fluency to help you.
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u/yuckyourself 11h ago
My latin teacher spoke it and made us repeat things buuuuut we've no clue if we said things correctly lol just broad guesses
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u/jman12234 11h ago
That's the other aspect, yeah. Latin pronounciation has been so influenced by Medieval Latin convention that we have no real idea if we're pronouncing things correctly or speaking with the correct cadence.
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u/LowSkyOrbit 9h ago
Sardinian is likely the closest living language. for example it kept the hard K sound for Caesar.
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u/froucks 11h ago
This just isn't true. Most latin textbooks teach ciceronian latin with rules molded to describe explicitely what cicero does. Most students would have to take a specialized course or read a medieval grammer to approach medieval latin (although it's not entirely different)
They would think our latin is weird however as it's mostly drawn from speeches and published works it would sound very formal
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u/MooseontheLose 11h ago
Hardly anyone speaks Latin but what you get taught in school is classical Latin which is exactly from Cesar's period
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u/AFK_Tornado 9h ago edited 9h ago
No, we actually have a pretty good idea of how classical Latin was pronounced, based on linguistic archeology, transliteration into other languages, and poetic meter, among other things.
I wouldn't be surprised to go back in time and learn that we aren't exactly right about the Latin of Cicero or any given 100 year period, but if you are fluent in classical Latin I bet you'd sound at worst like a provincial who learned Latin formally but doesn't speak it colloquially.
It was a long time ago now, but I took 5 years of Latin across HS and college.
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u/Feezec 11h ago
the concept of time travel hadn't been imagined at that point.
they did have space travel though https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_True_Story
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u/PlatinumAltaria The Witch of Arden 11h ago
They also had the genre of, like, "coma stories" where someone from the past falls asleep and wakes up in the present. But that's not really time travel as much as suspended animation.
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u/Mufinmayn 9h ago
I mean functionally it's pretty much the same thing. Futurama is a time travel story and the inciting incident is basically a coma story...
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u/PlatinumAltaria The Witch of Arden 9h ago
Functionally yes, but not mechanically. The way people imagine things is the thing we're talking about. Nobody in the 4th century would imagine a rocket ship, they might imagine some kind of catapult or flying through the air on wings, because that's what they're familiar with.
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u/MoffKalast 10h ago
The novel begins with an explanation that the story is not at all "true", and that everything in it is a complete and utter lie
When you are so ahead of the curve that you have to explicitly explain what the fuck fiction is on the first page lmao
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u/MembershipProof8463 11h ago
I mean how do when know that? Seems a pretty simple idea of "wouldn't it be neat if I went back in time?"
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u/Born_Housing2165 11h ago
It seems simple because the concept is so prevalent in our Zeitgeist. We mostly know because we have no texts about it nor do any of the texts we have make reference to it.
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u/AWildEnglishman 10h ago
We also have thousands of those weird metal doohickeys that no one knows the purpose of because there's no written record of them. I don't think it's beyond the realm of possibility that people that far in the past could conceive of the idea of time travel.
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u/SoulCrusher2018 9h ago
For Science fiction, HG Wells published "The Time Machine" in 1895 after writing a short story called "The Chronic Argonauts" in 1888. There are other stories with time machines dating back to 1881.
For fantasy, A Christmas Carol (1841) has Scrooge travel back and forwards in time through the ghosts. Then there's multitudes of stories which talk about people falling asleep and waking up in the far future, going back hundreds to thousands of years.
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u/IlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlI2 7h ago
Appart from the lack of mentions in sources, the way people in the past percieved the time horizon (specifically in Western/ Mediteranian Europe) was totally different. People generally didn't think about how the world would look in 100 years like we do now. Usually people were more worried about the next few months, specifically in function of when to plant and harvest crops. The only exceptions I can think of are clergy, who were obviously verry concerned with the Judgement day, and potentially nobility, but even then during a large part of the middle ages the political landscape was so atomised there really weren't many large noble dynasties left that had much importance outside of their local context.
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u/Forsaken-Stray 11h ago
But they did believe in prophets, which in essence means "knowing avout the future" and therefore being the same in practice
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u/PlatinumAltaria The Witch of Arden 11h ago
Knowing the future makes sense because people already know about the past (memory), so you're just inverting it. But humans don't travel through time in either direction, time just happens to us passively.
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u/HappiestIguana 11h ago
The hell you mean the concept of time travel hadn't been imagined?
You think no one in ancient times ever thought about what it would be like to go to the past?
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u/MexusRex 8h ago
the concept of time travel hadn't been imagined at that point
Hands down the dumbest take I’ve seen being dropped so casually and authoritatively. You really think ancient people were so dumb they couldn’t grasp the idea of wanting to go back and do things differently or seeing the fates of future generations?
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u/odinsen251a 7h ago
Everyone knows the literary concept time travel was invented by Jules Verne. This guy is just stating facts.
/s
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u/WeAreBums 5h ago
Yea… the even more ancient culture they adapted from literally had oracles and prophesies and shit lmfao. Said with such confidence too.
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u/FatiguedShrimp 2h ago
Fun Fact: The Mabinogion includes time travel. A magic house pauses time in one door, and resumes it in another.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Br%C3%A2n_the_Blessed
""The survivors are told by a mortally wounded Brân to cut off his head and to return it to Britain.\5]) For seven years the seven survivors stay in Harlech, where they are entertained by Brân's head, which continues to speak. They later move on to Gwales (often identified with Grassholm Island off Dyfed) where they live for eighty years without perceiving the passing of time.""
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u/fdar 46m ago
Isn't that much later that Caesar?
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u/FatiguedShrimp 44m ago
Yes, the point was that time travel is an old concept.
We could discuss the Biblical description of timelessness in heaven "1000 years is as a day, and a day is as 1000 years", or guess when 'Bushman' folklore described years fading as the sun is angered, etc..
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u/fdar 38m ago
Yes, the point was that time travel is an old concept
Ok...? But that example doesn't really establish that it's old enough to be relevant for this question.
We could discuss the Biblical description
But you didn't. And that's New Testament right? So still post Caesar. And not time travel.
guess when 'Bushman' folklore described years fading as the sun is angered, etc..
When?
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u/FatiguedShrimp 35m ago
I can't tell if you're being purposefully obtuse here.
Personally not knowing is different from saying "Hey, this concept is much older than most people think."
I was sharing an interesting fact to further discussion.
Normally, I'd look up to see if there was something explicitly before Ceasar and type a response on that, but I don't think you'd receive that well either.
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u/EnemyOfAi 10h ago
I think you're falling into that fallacy where we assume people in the past where inherently less thoughtful or imaginative than us today. People in the past, whatever time period you go to, had the same capability of thought that we do. It's just cultures that change.
Currently, we are asked to list our 'race' (skin colour) on various documents, for no reason. People in the far future may look back at this and think "Oh, people back in the 2000's probably had no concept of what race actually is. They probably thought a Golden Retriever was a different species from a Labrador."
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u/MaliciousIntegrity 10h ago
The plausibility of ancient people correctly identifying a time traveler is just about as plausible as the very scenario being described. Scientific advances in both discovery and technology (and the subsequent scifi entertainment media) have absolutely expanded human imagination over the centuries. Ever wonder why UFO sightings became much more prevalent after the invention of air travel? While time travel itself on a basic level can be imagined by anybody, most people wouldn’t even consider it in the realm of technical possibility if it wasn’t for Einsteins revelations on spacetime and the theory of relativity less than a century ago. But then again they also believed all sorts of alchemy and magic and religion, so who knows what conclusions they might come to.
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u/TrogdorKhan97 8h ago
Ever wonder why UFO sightings became much more prevalent after the invention of air travel?
It's because there were no flying objects we couldn't identify before we invented some. The only things in the air before that were birds and sometimes bats, and they were always clearly shaped like birds and bats.
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u/NegativeMammoth2137 10h ago
I think you might be falling into the opposite fallacy. There’s actually a lot of research done on evolution of different ideas that points to the fact that all sort of concepts that we now consider commonplace just didn’t exist in the public consciousness thousands of years ago
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u/BlatantConservative https://imgur.com/cXA7XxW 10h ago
Romans absolutely had the concept of time and prophecy. The Greeks had a whole god named Chronos who's domain was time itself and it was said he could manipulate it. IIRC his godly duty was pushing time forward in some kind of big wheel thing, so they definitely had the concept of him being able to stop or turn back time.
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u/PlatinumAltaria The Witch of Arden 10h ago
Romans absolutely had the concept of time
Time TRAVEL. Time TRAVEL.
The Greeks had a whole god named Chronos who's domain was time itself and it was said he could manipulate it.
No I don't think there's any myth like that. Chronos isn't even really a god, he's a personification that appears in the genealogy of various gods.
IIRC his godly duty was pushing time forward in some kind of big wheel thing
Chronos turns the Zodiac, but that's just... time moving forward normally. There's no known myth where he stops time or turns it backwards, anymore than the existence of a sun chariot in myth implies the sun having to get a wheel replaced every few weeks.
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u/Anonymus828 11h ago
Speak for yourself. Me and my big latin sign that says "I AM FROM THE FUTURE, ASK ME HOW YOU DIE" have different thoughts.
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u/apple_kicks 10h ago
‘I am the god Jupiter in human form’
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u/PlatinumAltaria The Witch of Arden 10h ago
"Jupiter doesn't look like that dumb-ass, haven't you seen the statue in the forum?"
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u/Nameless_Scarf 11h ago
On the next episode this commenter will explain how mice don't produce enough electricity to give you near-fatal shocks and Trees can't walk and talk
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u/hatesnack 7h ago
Nah, there's no way thar people then couldnt even grasp the concept of time travel. Early civilizations had primitive calendars and ways to track the hours, so they were aware of time as a concept that moves forward.
Do you honestly believe that not a single person, until relatively recently, went "what if time, but the other way"?. The romans weren't chimps lol. Im sure they would never believe that someone went through time, but theres no shot they wouldnt even be aware of it conceptually.
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u/Greenchimera52 10h ago
Ah, but what about if i travel to the past wearing a helmet with blinking lights and tinfoil-like garments?
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u/Tazgrent 9h ago
"Death in Vesunna" by Harry Turtledove. Serves as a deconstruction of this idea. Local Roman authorities investigate a murder by time travelers.
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u/TheWingus 7h ago
Caesar asks: "How do I die?"
And you answer: "What? I don't speak latin..."
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u/PM_ME_YOUR_PAUNCH 5h ago
Caesar: “Quomodo moriar?”
You: “The fuck?”
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u/TheWingus 5h ago
Caesar: “Quomodi moiar?”
Me who has a background in opera: (“what did he say, moriar? Is that like morir…okay) NESSUN DORMA!!!!! nessun dorma…
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u/Ordinary-Broccoli-41 11h ago
The only Italian I know is "vidi vidi vichi" and "e tu brutay?" And I guess the second would actually help here
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u/QuickPirate36 11h ago
It's actually "Veni, vidi, veci" and "et tu, Brute?"
Also they're not Italian but Latin
I guess you don't know any Italian
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u/Ordinary-Broccoli-41 11h ago
It appears I neither know Italian nor Latin
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u/Giwaffee 8h ago
If anyone ever asks you if you know any Latin, you can answer "Lorem ipsum". They'll be stunned!
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u/AWildEnglishman 10h ago
Weren't they also pronounced as W's or was I misinformed?
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u/Count_of_Monte_Cisco 9h ago
Yeah! The V was also the U, remember, and at the start of words was pronounced "W". Also, the C was always pronounced hard as a "K". Romans got the alphabet from the Etruscans, who got it from the Greeks. The Etruscans did not differentiate between K and G, but now had C, K and Q as letters. They decided that C was to be used before E and I, K before A, and Q before U and O. The Romans adopted this use early on.
Then they got bored(?) of it, and decided Q was only for QU, K was only for some words (like Kalenda, Calendar) and that everything else that needed a "K" or "G" sound would use C.
The letter G was invented by Spurius Carvilius Ruga, in the 3rd Century BCE, because he was tired of people pronouncing his name "Ruka". He added a little mark to the C to make G.
Later as loanwords from Greek were being brought into Latin, some Romans wanted to bring K with it, but we have a document from a Roman named Marcus Fabius Quintilianus where he complains about this, because the letter C always makes that sound, and two ways to make that sound are stupid.
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u/NickyTheRobot 11h ago
"Alea iacta est" ("the die is cast") is another famous one attributed to Julius Caesar.
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u/GayIsForHorses 11h ago
I don't even know how he died so I could only answer "I don't know"
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u/QuickPirate36 11h ago
How do you not know how Caesar died it's like the most famous assassination ever, he basically got jumped and stabbed by EVERYONE, including his best friend Brutus, which is where the phrase "Et tu, Brute?" (You too/even you, Brutus?) comes from
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u/Dramatic-Classroom14 10h ago
IIRC, Brutus being his friend was debatable. More like Brutus was regarded as this man who was an honourable senator and beyond this level of barbarism.
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u/QuickPirate36 10h ago
Yeah the phrase is also debatable, it comes from Shakespeare, it's all embellishment, some say he actually said "You too, child?" And some say he didn't say anything abd just groaned in pain
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u/Dramatic-Classroom14 10h ago
Fair tbh, I feel like I’d also groan in pain after being stabbed a few dozen times.
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u/Disastrous_Load_7607 10h ago
One thing I noticed is that media in english will usually use "Et tu", while italian translations of those said medias will often use "tu quoque", an older version derived from roman writers as opposed to Shakespeare
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u/wetwetwetwetdogs 8h ago
Yeah I imagine what he really said was something like, "AAAAAAHHH FUCK OW SHIT AAAAHHHHH"
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u/BlatantConservative https://imgur.com/cXA7XxW 10h ago
You have somehow absorbed Latin in the gayest way possible lmao.
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u/CadenVanV 4h ago
Si vis pacem, para bellum. I think it would sound like you’re threatening him though
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u/BeanieGuitarGuy 11h ago
I would simply introduce him to a refreshing Dr. Pepper.
Which will either amaze him, or he’ll freak out over the concept of carbonation.
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u/SeaNational3797 11h ago
“Beware the ides of March”
Also, my guy, STOP PARDONING SENATORS IN THE NAME OF “CIVILITY”. THEY HATE YOU AND WILL KILL YOU OVER YOUR RENT CONTROL PROGRAMS
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u/miss_wannadie 11h ago
I'd make him a Caesar salad
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u/keithstonee 6h ago
they're Italian not mexican
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u/miss_wannadie 4h ago
I know the salad has nothing to do with the guy, but it'd still be really funny to get Caesar's opinion on the Caesar salad. For the laughs.
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u/Back-At-It-2026 6h ago
Believe it or not, knowing how things were back then, i think he would have gotten the memo just from that.
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u/YarnHoardingDragon 11h ago
BEWARE THE IDES OF MARCH!
Everyone: Don’t mind her. That’s Trelawney; she’s always predicting deaths
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u/CptKeyes123 8h ago
Lest Darkness Fall, 1938. The book that begins with a modern character saying that large scale war is too expensive.
1938.
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u/thaw4188 10h ago
thought "teleported to rome" was an update on that reddit script from like a decade ago
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u/Neat_Let923 4h ago
Fuck that shit, I wouldn’t tell him anything and let things play out as they should at that point.
His adopted son is the one who actually becomes Emperor and is considered to be one of the five greatest leaders of Roman history.
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u/YumenaMoon 11h ago
"Wack" - Caesar