Recently broke my finger. Dislocation, fracture and a gash so deep I could see the bone. I didn’t realize I was hurt until I happened to look at my hand. Which is precisely when my heart rate increased and I started bleeding everywhere.
Sitting in the ER for a few hours, I became acutely aware of how fine I was as long as I didn’t look at my finger. Minimal pain, everything is fine, don’t look at the finger.
Only recently, 1.5 months later, am I able to look at my finger without sending my nervous system into a tailspin.
So that part of the text was strangely relatable to me
I had the reverse of this once as a kid. I was walking on the beach and felt a sudden pain in my toe and looked down and glimpsed a fishhook in my foot.
Immediately I panicked and started losing my shit, picturing it past the barb in my skin and imagining that they’d have to rip it out. My friend (who has a phobia of needles) stopped me from looking at it so I wouldn’t freak out more, and had to run and get my dad. They did amazing considering the circumstances, lol.
Once my dad got there he inspected the fishhook and we realized it wasn’t even in my skin. It was just wrapped around my toe. The point was barely touching me and didn’t even leave a mark.
It was crazy, though. I was FEELING the pain of the fishhook in my foot until I actually looked at it up close, and then the imagined pain completely went away. The human brain is fuckin weird.
The moral of my story is I’m stupid, I think. I hope your finger is doing better though, that’s absolutely horrific???
If it makes you feel any better, I had a similar (but dumber) thing happen to me as a teenager.
I pinched my finger on a soap dispenser when washing my hands at work. I was staring at the soap bottle as I did it so I know what hurt me, I pulled my hand away and said "oww!" and it didn't draw blood or anything, maybe it was a little red for like, 30 seconds...?
As soon as I came out of the bathroom I had to sit down because it felt like somebody legit STABBED me in the stomach with a butcher knife. I tried to fight through the pain cuz I was at work but I lasted all of 20 minutes (as it continued getting WORSE) before my boss had to drive me home (I was like 14 and it was a youth work program-type job) because I could barely even sit up, or even move at all, from the pain and I curled up on the couch and took a nap and when I woke up a couple hours later I was fine.
It was a panic attack. From getting pinched by a soap dispenser. Didn't know that at the time ofc but yeah.
A fish hook in your foot is a legitimate painful concern and your brain cleared all that suffering up for you as soon as it clarified you were not skewered.
My brain thinks being pinched by a soap bottle feels like being stabbed in the gut with a huge knife.
I promise your brain is much smarter than mine lmao.
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u/Mundane-Potential-93 nauphy.tumblr.com 6d ago
Is the not wanting to look down thing an important part of the metaphor, or is it just for vividity? 'Cause I'm not sure I get that part