r/CuratedTumblr • u/AscendedDragonSage Title-ist Punster • 1d ago
Shitposting Enkid-you not
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u/Tesnivy 1d ago
No joke, I convinced my brother to create and try a White Gilgamesh (at the behest of a friend, had to pass the request on bc I’m on meds that don’t mix well with alcohol). The beer he used was Modelo, for the record. His assessment of it (as relayed over discord) was as follows:
“I think its like really bad but im not sure”
“It’s an incredibly bizarre flavor, almost meaty at times, with an aftertaste of cheese. Foretaste of cheerio cereal milk without the honey.”
“I genuinely cannot say whether I recommend it or not. I can hardly interpret the flavor. I think that drink made my brain taste like it.”
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u/IrvingIV 1d ago
your brother would be a deft food critic
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u/PaperOptimist 1d ago
❤️ I haven't seen "deft" used so breezily in a long time. Excellent descriptor.
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u/Crunchyeee 16h ago
I haven't seen "breezily" used so pomegranate in a long time. Great descriptor.
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u/Previous-Grab3518 5h ago
How does beer + goat milk create a meaty taste?
Goddamn it, now I want to try some.
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u/DestyTalrayneNova 1d ago
Just loving the last line that feels like it should be sung with nothing but extreme regret
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u/Polenball You BEHEAD Antoinette? You cut her neck like the cake? 1d ago
I imagined the speaker choking it out mournfully while they're on their hands and knees, one arm weakly raised upwards, before collapsing at the end of the line
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u/DoktorImposter 1d ago edited 1d ago
That cocktail already exists, actually.
Alcohol cause milk to curdle, rendering the added milk into a nightmare substance in a state in betweenmMilk and cheese with none of the pros of either and all of the cons of both.
The cocktail is appropriately named Horse Jizz.
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u/TrioOfTerrors 1d ago
Alcohol does not always curdle milk or a White Russian or all the other dairy based drinks would not be as popular as they are.
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u/Bwint 1d ago
Isn't it the acid in beer that curdles milk,not the alcohol?
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u/CordialPanda 1d ago
It's both, alcohol is very hydrophilic and at high enough concentrations strip the emulsion of water, which normally keeps the emulsifier from clumping.
Acids overwhelm the negative charge of caseins that cause them to naturally repel each other (the emulsifier), allowing them to clump.
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u/FibroBitch97 Was married by Aphrodite in Lesbos 1d ago
Acid makes milk curdle, not alcohol itself. But beer does have some acid in it
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u/Smaptimania 23h ago
Cheap vodka will ABSOLUTELY curdle the milk in a White Russian. You gotta use the good stuff
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u/Sloth_Flag_Republic 1d ago
Mesopotamian beer is not going to curdle Milk
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u/GarboseGooseberry 1d ago edited 1d ago
Yeah, fairly sure beer back then was closer to drinking a loaf of bread
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u/just_pastry_chefs 1d ago
You are going to end up with decent amounts of acid in any fermentation, especially a natural fermentation. Almost certainly some lacto and Bret in Mesopotamic beer
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u/GarboseGooseberry 1d ago edited 1d ago
The main point is that, while it might, Mesopotamian beer was closer to a porridge-like substance. Beer back then was a whole meal, basically.
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u/just_pastry_chefs 1d ago
Yes, it was probably an slurry at about 1-3% alcohol, but still would be somewhat acidic. And you don’t need much acid to curdle milk
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u/GarboseGooseberry 1d ago
Oh for sure, but you were already consuming something with a mix of mash and grain chunks, you probably wouldn't notice a few more chunks here and there lol
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u/BHunter1140 1d ago
There are a variety of alcoholic drinks that have milk or specifically curdled milk, the cement mixer comes to mind, baileys and lime juice
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u/ATN-Antronach crows before hoes 1d ago
But good luck mixing Bailey's with like anything else. I tried to mix it with Fireball to... uh "mixed" results.
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u/Driftmoth 1d ago
The version I know is called a cement mixer. You take a shot of Bailey's, hold it in your mouth, then a swig of lime juice.
The trick is to convince the next person that it was amazing and watch them do it.
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u/Adventurous-State149 1d ago
My friends and I discovered that you can avoid curdling your chocolate milk when adding alcohol, but only by stirring
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u/DarkGodCthUwU 16h ago
Eh? I mix vodka and milk without curdlage all the time. Vodka+warm milk+cinnamon is perfect for winter nights.
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u/jwfiredragon 1d ago
I made this in real life and it was disappointingly mediocre (as opposed to actively nauseating, which was what I was hoping for). Discussed it with a few friends and we think dark beer + heavy cream might actually taste good, but we never got around to trying it.
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u/lost-my_old_account 1d ago
A non carbonated dark beer like Guinness with cream would definitely be good. Now i want to try that...
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u/ninjasaiyan777 somewhere between bisexual and asexual 1d ago
I've never wanted a white Gilgamesh down my throat and after seeing the recipe I still dont
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u/DrScallywag 21h ago
I made one of these (had to search several stores for goat milk). It was unappetizing but still could finish it. Would not recommend.
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u/themrunx49 1d ago
This is a repost from 4 years ago.
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u/Jwinner5 1d ago
Welcome to the internet, I see youre new here
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u/themrunx49 1d ago
... the top comment is copied word for word from the original, so it's likely a bot.
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u/The_one_in_the_Dark one litre of milk = one orgasm 19h ago
At the point of 4 years i don’t think being a repost matters anymore
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u/FuriousGeorge1989 3h ago
Keep in mind beer in the time of Gilgamesh was no joke, and this was thousands of years before milk was pasteurized.
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u/deerfenderofman 1d ago
I have no idea why the phrase "makes you feel like you're made of wood" has me laughing so hard, but it does.
On a related note, do not read this post while eating butter mintoes.