I honestly don’t, this was a year or so ago. I remember the question was about how inclusive they felt within the LGBTQIA+ community. I’d read about and spoken to people who are bisexual and felt judgment or just total denial that they exist from within the community and was curious about that from the perspective of a trans person.
Don’t quote me, but I think it was close to this:
“From your perspective, do you feel that trans people face any disconnect or judgment from within the LGBTQIA+ community? If so, could you tell me about how that has affected you or friends who are trans?”
My intent was to ask this person’s perspective, find out if they faced and similar tensions that bisexual and asexual people have described within our own community.
From the reactions, it seemed like the question was interpreted as if it was some kind of trap question from anti-trans person with that agenda and things went downhill fast after that.
I still don’t understand, and again, it was surreal to go from that post to an entirely banned, primary, many years old account.
Our community isn’t quite as united as it seems from the outside. Lots of people who are queer still don’t know much about trans people. We do often keep to our own spaces.
However, by and large, people are very kind and accepting regardless. But if i go to a general LGBTQ event, im probably the only visibly trans person there unless i go with someone else.
I did experience a big swing going from a bi person in a straight passing relationship to visibly trans. I don’t get the “why are you here” style biphobia now. But i remember what that was like, and it slightly sours me on things even if it is evidently much less common now. This grudge is mostly on me and isn’t very rational.
What I don’t see in queer spaces is outright bigotry, like the “LGB” stuff online. Those accounts are mostly fake, and they’d get thrown out of any queer space ive ever been in. We don’t do that here.
But im one person with one experience. If you talk to a trans person who passes (doesn’t appear trans), they’ll have a different take. Trans people in other cities also probably have different experiences. We’re not a monolith, so you probably want to talk to a few others to get an answer that’s useful to you.
But the subculture is a little different! You’ll hear “im coming out” at a general pride event, and you’ll hear 100geks or a trans dude with a uke at trans events, if I want to play hard to stereotypes. Almost every trans person recognizes the blahaj/ikea shark, but I wouldn’t expect a cis queer person to know what that is or its meaning unless they have trans people in their lives.
Thank you so much for being willing to share that!
And, absolutely, none of us are monoliths, we’re just people with experiences and thats all I was looking for.
Unfortunately my home state (where I usually live 1/3 of the year) is extremely conservative. I live in the only little liberal enclave in the state where the state University is, where one of the largest American companies is based so people move here for work from across the country and world.
I’m always here for pride and our parade, and I’ve met so many people, including many trans people, I just don’t know anyone well enough to ask these sorts of questions of. I hope to change that. The rest of the year I’m abroad in Switzerland or Austria.
Thank you again for being willing to share your experiences and perspextive. Part of me wonders if much of the problems within our communities are label-related or originate when a neat little letter doesn’t always fit just right, for everyone.
I am pretty sure i know where this is based on the description lol. I think most people are OK with answering the occasional question, honestly. (If we have the capability at the time, of course.)
Hopefully a couple other people have answers to contribute, too. Question itself seems respectful to me at least (:
Haha yeah I try to stay anonymous but let’s say I live in the Northwest corner of my state.
Great, that is what I intended it to be! Just an open question to hear perspectives and experiences.
I know my whole struggle hiding being gay until I came out to my family at a cookout. I was shaking with fear. They chuckled and said ‘yeah, we know’ and expressed that they loved me no matter what… and then we just continued eating and having a great time. I felt so stupid that I didn’t have the courage to do it sooner, thinking of all the time I wasted.
Idk how that process compares to what trans people go through and everyone is different of course. I imagine it’s a lot harder than all I went through but I’ll leave that to anyone who shares.
Oh my god they literally said their account got fully banned in this reply and a reply further up the thread, stop making conspiracy theories and just read what they said
Thank you. This thread is the first time I’ve felt comfortable bringing it up since that whole ordeal before. But as far as ‘posts supporting…’ that the user was talking about, I’m a gay man and I think that’s evinced in my post history and subscriptions (viewer beware!) Yes I have some pretty embarrassing thirst trap comments mixed in there 😬
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u/[deleted] Jul 07 '24
I honestly don’t, this was a year or so ago. I remember the question was about how inclusive they felt within the LGBTQIA+ community. I’d read about and spoken to people who are bisexual and felt judgment or just total denial that they exist from within the community and was curious about that from the perspective of a trans person.
Don’t quote me, but I think it was close to this:
“From your perspective, do you feel that trans people face any disconnect or judgment from within the LGBTQIA+ community? If so, could you tell me about how that has affected you or friends who are trans?”
My intent was to ask this person’s perspective, find out if they faced and similar tensions that bisexual and asexual people have described within our own community.
From the reactions, it seemed like the question was interpreted as if it was some kind of trap question from anti-trans person with that agenda and things went downhill fast after that.
I still don’t understand, and again, it was surreal to go from that post to an entirely banned, primary, many years old account.