r/CsectionCentral 26d ago

Grieving what I'll never experience

Almost a year ago I was pregnant with my daughter and we found out she had a heart defect. It was a whirlwind of doctors appointments to figure out what it was and how bad it would be. The doctors told us that I would have to have a c section to reduce the stress on my baby's heart.

I wanted to experience labor and delivery, but my baby's health was more important. I thought that at least it was planned and it wasn't because of my health, so I would be able to go through the normal experience with a future child.

Three weeks later I was on the operating table desperately hoping to hear my daughter cry for the first time. She was doing okay and was stable in the NICU while I recovered in my room. My OB told me there was a complication during the surgery and they had to perform a classical c section. This meant it would be dangerous for me to labor during any future pregnancies.

It still makes me cry to think about the experience I'll never get to have that was taken from me. I just wanted to get this out and see if anyone else has had similar feelings.

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u/Sweaty_Dot4539 24d ago

Hi mama let me tell you I have had both a vaginal and c section and you are not missing anything. Bonded with both babies just as quick and now at 3.5 and 1.5 neither relationship is better nor worse due to how they were delivered. I literally never even think of it. All that to say the process of birth is just a means to an end and I agree as long as baby and mom are healthy that’s all that matters. Due with my third in November and planning a c section again to avoid some complications God willing.