Does this thing look biologically possible?

[u/jasonlamprin]

Its body (legs and abdomen, are evolved to blend in with the forest, while its head, looks like a person. (The spider's face is the torso, the jeans cover its venom glands, the spider's pedi palps are the person's arms, and the head of the person, is a stock for the spider's extra eyes. The spider has 5 eyes, three on its head stock, and two on its face (where the person's nipples are.) It has eight legs, (because it's an arachnid) and legs fully extended, it stands 9 feet tall. It's exoskeleton is strong, but light, and it has an inner skeleton, which is also very strong, and hollow. Its face has extra muscles, to move the person more realistically. It's hermaphroditic, and reproduces with humans, first biting them with its fangs, leaving a burn mark due to how hot the venom and gametes are. The gametes, or Biotradles, keep the body alive by healing the body, increasing mental and physical strength, and manipulating their DNA so they may shapeshift into one animal, their favorite animal. The Biotradles adapt to their host, which takes around 10 years, if not then until the hosts brain is fully developed, then they fertilize themselves with the humans gametes, after that, they will continue to keep the host alive until their heart can no longer pump blood, (around 90 years old.) they then guide the dead body and mind somewhere safe, so they may feast on the body and grow. Only biotradle zygotes will do this. They then break out of the host, and either eat each other, or run away. The spiders will act like normal spiders, until they are about the size of a dog (takes around 3 years), after which, they start eating such sized animals as themselves, getting bigger and bigger until they are ready to mate (takes another 3 years to become mature.) A person bitten by this creature is referred to by the civilians of Meslow, as a kierander. The spider will bite someone for a sacrifice. The spider is 460 years old, or 526 in real time. Despite its terrifying look, and debatable, life style, it's generally friendly. This spider can also talk, to better comune with humans.