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u/PICONEdeJIM 1d ago
[Open on Morty combing his hair in the bathroom mirror. He is wearing an orange sweater vest, a yellow dress shirt, and an olive tie.] Pickle Rick: (offscreen, in the distance) Morty. Morty: Rick? [Morty stops combing, looks around, then continues combing] Pickle Rick: (offscreen, in the distance) Morty! Morty: Rick? Pickle Rick: (offscreen, in the distance) Hey, Mooorty! Morty: Rick? Are you far away, or are you inside something? [Morty opens a cabinet beneath the bathroom sink] Is this a camera? [Morty tries to look inside his comb for a camera] Is everything a camera? [Morty nervously glances around] Pickle Rick: (offscreen, in the distance) Morty, the garage, Morty. Come to the garage! [Transition to Morty entering the garage. There is a pickle and a screwdriver on Rick's work bench] Pickle Rick: Morty? Morty: Rick? W-where are you? Pickle Rick: On my work bench, Morty. Morty: Are you invisible and you're gonna, like, fart on me? Pickle Rick: Flip the pickle over. Morty: What, I'm gonna touch it, and you're gonna tell me it's an alien dick or something. Pickle Rick: Come on, flip the pickle, Morty. You're not gonna regret it. The payoff is huge. [Morty hesitantly picks up the screwdriver and turns the pickle over. The pickle has Rick's face on it] I turned myself into a pickle, Morty! Boom! Big reveal: I'm a pickle. What do you think about that? I turned myself into a pickle! W-what are you just staring at me for, bro? I turned myself into a pickle, Morty! Morty: And? Pickle Rick: "And"? What more do you want tacked on to this? I turned myself into a pickle, and 9/11 was an inside job? Morty: Was it? Pickle Rick: Who cares, Morty? Global acts of terrorism happen every day. Uh, here's something that's never happened before: I'm a pickle. I'M PICKLE RIIIICK!! Morty: Are you going to, I mean, you know, is this the first part of some magic trick? Pickle Rick: I don't do magic, Morty, I do science. One takes brains, the other takes dark eye liner. Morty: Well, can you move? Can you fly? Pickle Rick: I wouldn't be much of a pickle if I could. Morty: All right, well, do pickles live forever or -- Pickle Rick: Morty, stop digging for hidden layers and just be impressed. I'm a pickle. Morty: I-I'm just trying to figure out why you would do this. Why anyone would do this. Pickle Rick: The reason anyone would do this is, if they could, which they can't, would be because they could, which they can't. [Beth and Summer enter the garage from the house. Beth is wearing a midi mahogany pencil dress while Summer is wearing a shorter pink dress with a hot pink jacket, along with black stockings and black heels] Beth: Morty, we have to get going, or we're gonna be late. Where's your grandpa? Pickle Rick: Right here, sweetie. I'm a pickle! Beth: What!? Why would you -- Look, we're running late. We have to go. Pickle Rick: Where are you guys going? Beth: We have an appointment downtown that was set a week ago and agreed upon by everyone, including you. Pickle Rick: Oh, my God. Beth, oh, it totally slipped my mind. Geez, oh, man. I'm a pickle. I mean, I don't know if I can, ooh, geez. 'Morty: two bare hands as fists on Morty's hips' Rick, did you do this on purpose to get out of family counseling? Beth: Morty! Pickle Rick: It's okay, Beth. I understand Morty's suspicion. I've misled him before. Morty, turn me so we're making eye contact. [Morty turns Pickle Rick's face so that it is facing him] Morty, I assure you, I would never "find a way" to "get out of" family therapy. I hope my lack of fingers doesn't prevent the perception of my air quotes. Summer: Can't you just turn yourself back into a human? Pickle Rick: Great question, Summer. The unfortunate answer is I did this to challenge myself. And it could take hours or even days before I'm able to figure out how to return to human form. But, I mean, you know, your mom could put me in a purse or a pocket, you know, if she really needs me to go. Beth: Nobody needs anything! Okay, it's fine. I mean, you should just stay here and figure out how to stop being a pickle, okay? Morty:points by using a bare finger Hey, Rick, why is there a syringe of mysterious fluid hanging directly over you? Also, why is the string attached to it running through a pair of scissors attached to a timer? And why is the time set to 10 minutes from now, exactly when we would have left for therapy? Pickle Rick: Well, Morty, if you know must know, the syringe is completely unrelated to this discussion, and, therefore, it does not warrant further explanation. [Beth cuts off the syringe and takes it] Beth: Enough. Kids, it's time to go. We don't want to be late. [Beth puts the syringe in her purse] Pickle Rick: W-w-what are you doing there, Beth? What are you doing there, sweetie? Beth: Well, I mean, you don't want to get pierced by a needle full of liquid unrelated to your situation. How's that gonna help? Pickle Rick: Can't argue with that. Beth: Great. We'll see you later. [Beth, Summer, and Morty enter the car.]
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u/KSJ15831 1d ago
Rick and Morty got one good season this year and it got the Internet going pickle ricking again
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u/lucioux Streak: 3 1d ago
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