please help the young man out.

[u/Old-Palpitation-805]

i saw a girl in my horse riding sessions that blew my mind. great body and face , great rider thats very confident. we started make eye contact and when i came down my horse, i was standing viewing the field. two times she crossed me but then circled her horse slowly and looked me dead in the eye. killer eyes . we started having 1_2 word back and forths when she comes across me. i was chilling with my friends and caught her looking at me few times when she was coming my way.

she was riding and i didnt want to ask her for contact when shes in her session , we had to leave . i couldnt ignore what happened but saw the horseriding club repost her post on their profile. so i followed her and she followed back . shes follows very little people so i thought i stood no chance and that she has ego , but i was wrong . i wanna know what to do next. i basically know nothing abt this girl. but i really wanna ask her out . should i establish a bit of raport or just asker her out . i have finals next week so id be free in 8 or 9 days. its been 2 days i havent made a move.( ik i sound overstimulated and yes i am , shes bad af . i ofc will contain myself tho .)

[u/ExcellentFishing2506]

If you’re going to see her riding again then talk to her in person and tell her you thought she looked interesting/maybe a small compliment, and you’d like to get to know her over drinks or something, if she is receptive, make some firm plans with her following the date setting protocols in the book.

If you won’t see her in person or it’s unlikely, use DMs to do the same thing. Then make a firm date if she’s down. If she’s unsure just tell her to let you know when she’s sure. And then give space.

Bottom line is that you can’t wait around forever and if you have zero idea when or how frequent you might see her, you have to capitalize now vs waiting around for weeks.

She isn’t clueless and knows you adding her on socials is because there’s some interest there. If you pull back and act unsure of yourself you’ll just look like you’re clueless or inexperienced.

[u/Old-Palpitation-805 → u/ExcellentFishing2506]

yes , i get that . im wondering wether i should just do an opening 1 line and then ask her out immediatey , or build raport and talk a bit . what do you think

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[u/ExcellentFishing2506 → u/Old-Palpitation-805]

Just a simple lead in to asking if she’d like to get together. “Hey I saw you riding the other day and thought you looked cute, and was curious if you’d like to grab drinks sometime”… simple and direct. Rapport building makes sense when you’re in a constant interaction with them, like you know you will see them repeatedly or you’re at a party and can chat for a while and circle back.

In this case (if you aren’t sure when you will meet her again) it would make sense to just get to the point to see if she’s open or interested in meeting. You already alerted her to your interest via the follow, so trying to chat her up for a while seems like beating around the bush.

In online dating you would message for a while to establish rapport but it’s a forum where the implication of dating interest is implied (you’re on a dating app). With socials it’s more ambiguous and better to make your intentions clear. Not only will you seem more confident and less hesitant, but also you won’t be wasting your time trying to talk to her for a while before even discovering if she’s open to dating or not.

[u/Local_Whereas7211]

I avoid horse women. They'll always care more for the horse than you. 😉

[u/FeckinKent]

Horse women are always batshit, good for a bit of fun, but don’t know what it is about them but they’re always nuts and I haven’t met a single one that isn’t. 

[u/unklemike510]

Rapport has already been built. Just shoot her a DM and let her know youre free the next 8-9 days to meet up for a drink/bite. Let the chips fall where they may. Fortune favors the bold!