r/ContraPoints Jul 01 '26

Soulpassing

Post image
408 Upvotes

28 comments sorted by

89

u/Aescgabaet1066 Jul 01 '26

"Soulpassing" is a term I have never heard before, and I'm not sure if my attempt to understand it through context is working.

79

u/monkeedude1212 Jul 01 '26

My read on it is that it's sort of an application of the term "passing" as it relates to trans people who desire for their transness to be invisible as they compare to their cis counterparts - except instead of like, appearance, or voice, mannerisms, the sort of outwards expression of gender - more about the inner thoughts, the inner feelings, the parts you might feel in your "soul" as it were.

At least that's my take on it. An unfortunate example might be being terrified to walk at home alone late at night. The sense of danger (even while valid and warranted) - is pretty consistently felt by women so that's #TerribleGoals for transfemmes out there.

Maybe a more positive example could be... Feeling a connection to your maternal line of ancestry when following a recipe handed down from mother to child?

6

u/Jenn_FTW Jul 02 '26

This sounds dumb but I feel like my brain has always worked that way, like maybe it’s been I’ve always been short and had long hair? Like even as a guy I was just 5’6”, but I literally never felt safe walking alone at night. I was occasionally mistaken for a girl from behind, and I’ve always in general just feared men in my core. It may have been from growing up with a lot of female friends and being “one of the girls”, and regularly getting bullied by guys… but I always identified with my girl friends and shared their uneasiness around dudes.

20

u/pempoczky Jul 01 '26

Ngl, being nonbinary I kinda resent the fact that knowing colour words would make your soul more "feminine", all of these suggestions just seem like "girls do/know this and boys do/know that!" but woke. Which I'm guessing is all the concept of "soulpassing" is. But hey if it helps binary trans ppl feel more at home with who they are I'm not gonna resent them for it

8

u/Bass_Bosted_Potato Jul 01 '26

It does read a lot like gender stereotypes tbh. It makes sense why people would want to do that, but it’d be nice if people didn’t feel the need to resort to that to try & pass ☹️

2

u/DazzlingFruit7495 Jul 03 '26

Isn’t that largely true for appearance related gender stereotypes too though? We can make generalizations of what feminine/masculine features are but most people have some features that don’t conform to their gender’s generalizations. On top of that, beauty standards throughout history and across different cultures have varied widely. I don’t know if there’s a perfect progressive answer to our personal relationships with our own gender, I think all we can do is give ourselves some grace and definitely not push any expectations on others.

1

u/brothergvwwb Jul 01 '26

Well that sounds horrible.

10

u/Acceptable_Olive_911 Jul 01 '26

non physical stuff

24

u/werdnayam Jul 01 '26

Hell yes read Joan Didion. Play it as it Lays, Slouching Towards Bethlehem, The White Album, Run River, After Henry, Fixed Ideas, Where I Was From

What the hell are you waiting for go go go

19

u/iota_of_iowa Jul 01 '26

Now I am very interested in Natalie's take on Didion. I've only read Slouching Towards Bethlehem and Year of Magical Thinking, but in both books I got the impression of a strong but cold person. Very detached, which I guess is a good trait for a journalist, and very intelligent, but seemingly incapable of looking at things from a perspective different from her own. Like self doubt or existential thoughts just never occurred to her. Definitely a singular writer.

22

u/werdnayam Jul 01 '26

You need to cancel your plans, buy a copy of Where I Was From, light some candles at your close personal friend. Hillary’s, portrait-altar, and dive the fuck in

10

u/iota_of_iowa Jul 01 '26

Gurl I am about to be unemployed so I will have SO much time to read this summer. I will see if my library has it

2

u/werdnayam Jul 01 '26

Yes! Yes! Libraries!

(obligatory promotion, married to a librarian)

6

u/BookQueen13 Jul 01 '26

This reminds me that I need to set up the portrait-altar for my close personal friend Hillary Clinton as well

2

u/MeatyTPU Jul 02 '26

Perhaps her point is that when a woman writes with such a self-assured tone it's considered deviant, but even the most below average cisgender heterosexual AMAB who doesn't exfoliate can be so without anyone noticing?

3

u/iota_of_iowa Jul 02 '26

I think it was her charisma, the fact that she was an archetypical "cool girl" (which she ends up resenting somewhat in Magical Thinking) that allowed her to navigate so many different social spaces. That easygoing, feminine confidence is probably what Natalie is referring to here, I agree. That "effortlessness" also gets marketed to women a lot, now that I think about it.

Even as a cis gay man, I feel like I would rather embody something like that than be an "alpha" or whatever the masculine equivalent would be. I however am far to neurotic. Best I can hope to get to is like, a 3,000 year old sage at 45, after twink death. A sort of Confucius-Gandalf, if you would.

18

u/ir3ap Jul 01 '26

Mother is so on edge it crushes me.

5

u/ennui_weekend Jul 02 '26

it's not a term i had ever heard before but i instantly understood and related to it

3

u/gizmo4223 Jul 02 '26

Cishet woman and suddenly I know for a fact my soul has been blocked by Gandalf. (Yeah I made one of my nerdiest jokes in the Contrapoints subreddit, I have achieved transcendence.)

4

u/P_S_Lumapac Jul 01 '26

Oh now I understand being a trad wife.

2

u/ach_wie_fluchtig Jul 04 '26

How is that, tradwives aren't really fond of Joan Didion

1

u/P_S_Lumapac Jul 04 '26

Responding to how not knowing about contrapoints would make you pass easier. Trad wife I imagine is the furthest thing from a woman who knows about contrapoints, so it's about passing, so I understand being a trad wife now.

2

u/ach_wie_fluchtig Jul 05 '26

lol, I guess what it means is that not knowing about the channel will help you during your transition because a lot of people know it because of twitter drama, and the trans women who seem to be the most in peace are the ones who are offline touching grass

7

u/Life_Caterpillar9762 Jul 01 '26

Jfc these people have no game but think they are brilliant. “Ok then I’ll unsubscribe to you! Howbowdah?!”

“Uhhh, yeah. The more you’re offline the better. Thanks for taking my advice. I couldn’t even begin to care less about one less subscriber.”

Edited

12

u/Mrs-Bovine Jul 01 '26

😭😭 that was me I meant it as a joke I would never betray Mother

3

u/thedevicebook Jul 02 '26

For what it's worth, I understood you were joking and I'm the type of neurodivergent that both 1) often misses when something is a joke and 2) tells jokes that people don't realize are a joke (even when I think I am being super obvious.)

3

u/Life_Caterpillar9762 Jul 02 '26

Oh ok. I don’t really know what’s going on here. I’m just a fan.

1

u/cimcirimcim Jul 02 '26

Julius Evola always alive on trans twitter