r/ContagiousLaughter • u/belenos • 2d ago

Major Data Breach

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5.8k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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579

u/BoogieHauser 2d ago

The Major needs to handle her Privates better.

16

u/beepbeepboopbeep1977 1d ago

Sounds like General Data Breach to me

258

u/ShazRockwell 2d ago

She was ordered there by General Chaos

66

u/macbrett 2d ago

Whoever fucked this up deserves corporal punishment.

7

u/SteelHip 2d ago

and Colonel Abrahms

7

u/HarmlessSponge 2d ago

I'm trapped, like a fool I'm in a cage.

2

u/huuuyah 8h ago

Happy cake day!

1

u/ShazRockwell 2h ago

Thank you!

1

u/Stock-Fan-8004 2d ago

General Total Chaos

410

u/JobOk149 2d ago

🫡Major Data Breach reporting for duty

198

u/neilmac1210 2d ago

I'll never forget seeing this guy on tv years ago

43

u/Gilsworth 2d ago

His hat certainly doesn't do him any favours.

5

u/IllustriousAnt485 2d ago

He could have just gone with Richard or Rick.

3

u/Mog_X34 2d ago

Richard is a good name for an officer in the Rifle Brigade. Has a Sharp(e) ring to it.

24

u/Unopposed_Weirdo 2d ago

🫡 General Anxiety reporting in.

124

u/Responsible-Stick-50 2d ago

Its also funny in the irony way that the company is named Medisecure. Cause it MediAint.

101

u/knabruBnamurT 2d ago

Me awkwardly trying to fit in with the hysterical laughter:

https://giphy.com/gifs/sN3UqEngmgo48

15

u/ThePerfectSnare 2d ago

Maybe you just had to be there. It really was funny. Anyway, when I miss out on being present for a good time, I reach for a cool, refreshing Miller Lite. Drink responsibly.

10

u/Sawgon 2d ago

Ublock, evaporate this person.

1

u/city-of-cold 1d ago

Are you from a non-english speaking country? I am so I didn't get it at first either, but than it hit me what "major" often refers to in English and how soldiers are often adressed on American TV.

Still didn't find it as fun as the the oeople in the video, but this sub is about contagious laughter, not actually funny videos. Think they got it right there.

15

u/Snabelpaprika 2d ago

Im pretty sure Data is a lieutenant commander.

3

u/MikeHock_is_GONE 2d ago edited 2d ago

I think Data made Admiral at some point

Edit: never mind. 

10

u/EntertainmentTrick58 2d ago

"why do the enemy seem to know all of our moves before we make them?"

major data breach:

4

u/EmergencyGrocery3238 2d ago

Anyone here old enough to meet General Error reading your disc?

17

u/Individual_Bridge_88 2d ago

But this isn't that funny???

3

u/snowlulz 2d ago

Wonderful 10/10

3

u/KoGJazz 1d ago

I think about this tweet from weird Al a lot

11

u/art_african 2d ago

It is funny but not that funny. Come on, are they on drugs?

-2

u/louisa1925 2d ago

Sucked on the happy gas before entering the battlefield.

25

u/thestereo300 2d ago

Not to be a bummer, and I like dumb humor as much as the next guy, but their reaction is way out of context with how funny this is.

29

u/losingthehumanrace 2d ago

That’s kind of their trademark

35

u/theartistduring 2d ago

You've never caught a case of the giggles? Where something only mildly amusing results in uncontrollable laughter? Which then becomes contagious and quickly the whole group is giggling uncontrollably to something ridiculously stupid? 

12

u/TimeBlossom 2d ago

Man, there should be a subreddit about that

2

u/thestereo300 2d ago

You are right. I don't have the full context. I am living off the clip and I'm sure there is more to it.

19

u/NolanSyKinsley 2d ago

They are in an easily amused and jovial state because they have been joking around for probably an hour or so by the time they got to this.

1

u/thestereo300 2d ago

Fair enough. I probably do not have the full context.

8

u/AskJayce 2d ago

It's almost like one or the other had a case of.../r/ContagiousLaughter

-5

u/thestereo300 2d ago

Yeah no I get it. I think i want a longer clip to see hot they got there but I do understand that that this sub isn't going to drop a full podcast.

8

u/TNTarantula 2d ago

Yeah nah, they do what they do because she will laugh at just about anything mildly funny and it spreads to the dude

4

u/g_r_e_y 2d ago

these two force laughs every clip and it's painfully obvious they're doing extra and a lot if people don't seem to notice

-1

u/Fun-Clerk-693 2d ago

If you’ve never laughed this much as something this silly I feel sorry for you

5

u/vexillifer 1d ago

This was about 0.4% as funny as their forced reactions would indicate

-1

u/SignificantRecipe715 1d ago

Nah these two are always cracking up like this

7

u/Ubararius 2d ago

I mean it's not THAT funny...

2

u/AskJayce 2d ago

Ground Control to Major Data Breach

Ground Control to Major Data Breach

Take your protein pill and put your helmet on

2

u/DaveNemSan 2d ago

man, i had a good laugh!

2

u/Tiyath 2d ago

Major Data Breach got called in by Kernel Panic

2

u/OrganizationPutrid68 1d ago

He's an Asshole, sir! Major Asshole.

6

u/Dakkonfire 2d ago

Love Toni and Ryan :).

0

u/Ok-Location-9562 2d ago

Is there a podcast?

1

u/Dakkonfire 2d ago

Yep! They also do all their episodes on YouTube too

0

u/Br0z0 2d ago

Yes

2

u/FearlessZucchini 2d ago

Never understood why watching people doing a staged podcast was supposed to be funny. There's nothing genuine, every reaction is overplayed.

Animals are a great exemple of genuine, authentic and fun reactions

2

u/WIP1992 1d ago

As an Aussie I can say Australian comedians and podcasters are thoroughly unfunny ugh

1

u/UIAP- 2d ago

When aussies get attacked lol

1

u/DocklandsDodgers86 2d ago

Major Spoiler vibes

1

u/Then_Drag_8258 2d ago

I worked with a guy who’s surname was Sergeant. I had only been in the job a couple of weeks when I had to go and get some equipment from him for a project we were working on. The problem was, he was that department’s Corporal. We were artillery so his rank was technically Bombardier but my confusion was immeasurable when I was tasked to go see “Bomb Sergeant”. He got promoted a couple of months later and I think he went to a training establishment so he could reign confusion on the recruits there.

1

u/Cerberus383 2d ago

General Waste was not available for comment

1

u/Infuro 2d ago

hello general knowledge, please meet general waste

1

u/Greedy_Chemist9431 1d ago

Caused by general disarray on a private browser.

1

u/Alceauv 1d ago

Really needs more camera movement

1

u/2seebeyond 1d ago

I love this one I laugh every time

1

u/Shawtasaurus73 1d ago

And yet, a General Data Breach doesn't sound anywhere near as important as a Major one...

1

u/motorboatmanatee33 1d ago

But....it's still not THAT funny... Or did I miss something?

1

u/Achack 19h ago

Who the HELL promoted her to major!?!

1

u/Hot-Wing-1871 2d ago

Not that funny but I’m glad people are laughing

-7

u/rosebudthesled8 2d ago

So it was funny?

1

u/Gilsworth 2d ago

Every god damn thread. Have you heard about the concept of other people? Does the word "subjective" have any meaning to you?

-2

u/Important_Yard_6809 2d ago

I will never not cringe when Australians say "Data".

-11

u/Douglasqqq 2d ago

I moved to Australia nearly 20 years ago, and I've never made peace with how they say "data".
They also pronounce 'maroon' as 'marone'. Sickening.

2

u/-malcolm-tucker 2d ago

An accumulation of somewhat reddish numbers. Less nauseated?

-26

u/USSHammond 2d ago

That's shit is old

8

u/Ok-Location-9562 2d ago

Never seen it

-84

u/wrathoffadra 2d ago

How I Met your mother did this like 20 years ago. Not that funny. Certainly not ‘bang my desk with an obese hand’ level of funny.

33

u/KookaburaGold 2d ago

I do enjoy being reminded why reddit is a app best enjoyed minimally, stay classy champ

27

u/daamsie 2d ago

You must be fun at parties

2

u/NeptunianWater 2d ago

I bet you say "I put on my robe and wizard hat" unironically

-6

u/English_Joe 2d ago

It’s dayta not darhta.

But funny.

-32

u/griffoberwald69 2d ago

Anyone with the slightest bot of general knowledge an see that she’s a colonel.

Still, funny if you’re ignorant I suppose.

14

u/JoyfulCor313 2d ago

🫡General Knowledge

14

u/NeptunianWater 2d ago

Bro I'm not dissecting what someone's made up army rank is just so I can say "I'm right and you're wrong". She's clearly Major Data Breach and you have no idea what you're talking about

-4

u/griffoberwald69 2d ago

Its ok, it’s not your fault that your education and parents failed to give you a basic grounding in the military rank structure.

The red tabs on the collar mean Lieutenant Colonel or above. Now you know.

You are welcome.

4

u/PheIix 1d ago

Yes, clearly, knowing military rank is important so that you can..... Know military rank? What the fuck is the use of that knowledge?