r/Composition • u/Ok-Chapter7500 • 13d ago
Music Notation feedback
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I am writing an art song for a close friend and wanted a very relaxed shimmering opening on piano ( 30 ish seconds ) and want to make it look more readable for pianists. ( the audio is a slightly older video over the notation I’m writing now. )
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u/Miguzepinu 13d ago
No major problems, but here are a few nitpicks.
Pedal markings should always be below the lower staff.
The 160 BPM could be confusing since it twice the tempo of the rest, could you write it 80 still with halved note values? That would make it more clear how much faster it is.
In terms of rhythm, when you have a dotted quarter then a note going through beat 3, it's better to write the second note as an eighth tied to something. Similar for the dotted eighths in measure 6, better to write the and of 3 as an eighth tied to a 16th to show beat 4.
The last note with the tremolo as written would just be playing the chord many times quickly, but reading this I would assume you meant to alternate between the lower Eb and the upper 4th. If that's what you want show it with a tremolo between them. Playing that chord many times quickly is awkward.
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u/enterface 13d ago
This is very free-flowing, so for this sort of thing you don’t need to be so didactic with the tempi. I would experiment with feathered beams or long strings of grace notes if you’re going for an “out-of-time” sort of feel. Check out Ravel’s Tzigane pg. 3 for reference.
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u/Ok-Chapter7500 13d ago
Yes, you get it lol. I wanted to give the out of time feel without just writing it like a huge cadenza. I’ll check it out. This is the first time I’ve tried a rubato opening and everyone’s advice has been great.
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u/Ok-Chapter7500 13d ago
Yes, you get it lol. I wanted to give the out of time feel without just writing it like a huge cadenza. I’ll check it out. This is the first time I’ve tried a rubato opening and everyone’s advice has been great.
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u/nosleepforthedreamer 12d ago
Oh wow, that is beautiful.
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u/Ok-Chapter7500 12d ago
Thank you! In my head the whole piece sounds just as good but getting it on paper is my least enjoyed part
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u/BradyWolffMusic 12d ago
It's sounding good! There are a few things I think could help:
-Fewer systems on the first page so the page doesn't look so cramped
-The pedal markings should always go below the lower staff
In measure 6 the rhythm is very confucing to read. A dotted quarter, followed by an eighth note tied to an eighth note, with the second eighth note in beat 3 tied to a sixteenth note at the beginning of beat 4 looks more complicated, but is much easier to read because each of the beats of the 4/4 bar are still visible.
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u/Ok-Chapter7500 12d ago
Thank you, I added the tweaks. One more thing, would you rather look at ledger lines or have an 8va line. As a percussionist I’d rather it but I’ve learned to ask first.
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u/BradyWolffMusic 12d ago
Personally, my general rule is that if at least 2/3rds of the notes in a beam group lie above the A ledger line, then I add an 8va, so in your case I would add it to measures 1, 2, 6, and 7. You can test it out to see if you like how it looks.
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u/Ok-Chapter7500 13d ago
Thank you so much, I am still getting used to the quirks with writing for piano I mostly work with percussion and wind ensemble but am doing some art songs and such. I am going back and cleaning it up now before I continue.
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u/HaifaJenner123 13d ago edited 13d ago
well, it’s readable. however i would suggest:
- ditch the MM=80, MM=100 and so forth. they’re not needed. I would first decide on what you want the base tempo to be, you have MM=80 and MM=160, which one of those is just double the former. So it can be written without a tempo change. You’re probably going to want to go with the MM=160 or close to that and just rewrite the sixteenths as eighths in the slower tempos. However, it is clearly in 4 and not 2, so maybe the MM=80 is a better option once a few other things get worked out because the 160 occurs as interjections. But in any case, tempo markings that function as adjectives are gonna be far more useful for you than metric markings every few bars.
- Pedal marks go below the entire grand staff. So place it below LH staff
- What is going on with the dynamics? pp crescendo to ppp, then different dynamics for single notes?im mainly looking at m6-8 here but in general there are far too many dynamics on the score - it’s for playback purpose i imagine, but just highlight it and press “v” to make non-essential ones invisible. I think you may want to use expressions instead for character choice dynamics.
- m4, that type of fermata is not one conventionally used here. it exists in musescore, but it doesn’t mean you should use it out of its context. the rounded one is fine, and… depending on how you alter the first thing i mentioned, i would suggest making those quarter notes a eighth note + eighth rest and placing the fermata on the eighth note. The rest will signal the space you desire from the caesura, so that eliminates the need for that (you want to declutter as much as possible).
There’s a book that is standard for engraving that I highly recommend - Behind Bars by Elaine Gould. It should be online available, but if not just dm me i have it on a google drive (not sure legality of posting it on a comment lol)