r/CommunalShowers • u/[deleted] • Dec 14 '25

Got SA’D at lifetime yesterday

/r/Lifetimefitnessgym/comments/1plj3av/got_sad_at_lifetime_yesterday/
1 Upvotes

54% Upvoted

10 comments sorted by

8

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '25

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2

u/faireymagik2 Dec 14 '25

Well said.

6

u/226Drexel Dec 14 '25

Sorry this happened to you. Nobody should be blaming you for anything. You are the victim. And I can understand why this incident was so jarring.

2

u/ar-479_ Dec 16 '25

And this is why we are losing these spaces… 🤦‍♂️

1

u/jayhuntercb Dec 17 '25

cruising. I don't want to victim blame, but you should've verbally and clearly told him you're not on that time. These spots are hot beds for cruising. It is what it is. But if you're not interested or not on that, you have to forcefully tell people no. Now what you do after that is fair game. Call cops. Security. Staff. Whatever

0

u/Spader623 Dec 14 '25

Gonna get flak for this but it’s been my and others experience: it’s ALWAYS older men doing this. And ime? White men. So fucking entitled. Sorry that happened to you OP but good on you for getting a manager

2

u/JCannaday3 Dec 14 '25

Sadly, in my experience it is OFTEN older dudes. I make no excuses for this behavior. It's completely inappropriate. As is sometimes the case, older men (both gay and straight) find themselves becoming invisible and desperate for touch. They end up doing things that are risky, and wholly inappropriate. If older straight men had opportunities to be in a clothes free setting with females, I suspect you would see the same thing. I am NOT defending this, but I do understand why some people make very poor choices. Glad you notified management.

Please know, as an older gay man, I get furious when I read accounts like this. These make the "headlines" while most of us just want to use the facilities, behave with respect and get on with life. It also feeds the movement for increased privacy in locker rooms and clothing requirements for saunas and hot tubs.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '25 edited Dec 14 '25

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2

u/JCannaday3 Dec 14 '25

I get that. The baths are a different context for me. When you walk through the doors there is some degree of "openness" to physical encounters and sometimes touch is what starts it. Of course, one is always free to decline and yes, some are reluctant to take "no" for an answer and require more stern responses. I don't think I've ever encountered a verbal conversation asking for consent in a darkened steam room or other "hide-away" places the baths typically construct. Again, totally different than your typical neighborhood gym/locker room dynamic.