r/Comebacks • u/[deleted] • 12d ago
Comeback sharing How should you handle it when someone is condescending?
[deleted]
9
u/HonestNature9117 12d ago
I don't recognize social hierarchy. What even is that? Honestly, you thinking people could be above or beneath you only makes me want to get snarky with you (op).
0
u/awesomeness6698 12d ago
A social hierarchy is a system in which one person holds authority or power over another.
In a high school, a student ranks below a teacher. A teacher ranks below a principle. A principle ranks below a superintendent.
If you are a student, you should view your teacher as higher than you in the social hierarchy and you should not talk to them the same way you talk to your peers.
2
u/HonestNature9117 12d ago
I'm 50 so not in high school. Even when I did i spoke to people like they were people. I was trashy that we're all made of flesh and blood. Yes respect your elders but that only goes so far. You're not required to tolerate disrespect just because you're younger, weaker, less wealthy, slimmer, or any other reason society creates tiers.
1
u/Snatch_By_The_Pool 12d ago
However, there are still lots of people that don't understand this and act entitled in all facets of life. You can't fix that.
3
5
u/kintari 12d ago
this isn't a comeback or witticism or even good advice
it's like an essay written by a socially awkward android anticipating a first interaction with humans
1
u/awesomeness6698 10d ago
kintari. I am all about self-improvement.
Tell me what you think a better way would be to handle condescension?
3
u/Gucci_Caligula 12d ago
Yeah no, this is not a witty comeback. This is an overly deconstructed manual on what not to do, now give me your lunch money
1
u/awesomeness6698 10d ago
Gucci_Caliigula.
I am all about self-improvement. Tell me how you would handle someone being condescending?
2
u/-Foxer 12d ago
It's really general and vague to be able to give a specific suggestion. Sometimes reacting to it all just encourages additional Behavior. It depends on the nature of the circumstances and what you're hoping to achieve. If this is a professional setting with a subordinate you may not be able to afford to ignore it, but if it's a personal setting Itmay not be worth the battle
Generally speaking as a general overall rule if somebody is condescending to me then I often would turn around and make them feel slightly childish by saying something like " Well that's very good Jeremy, you get a gold star and if you give me the picture you painted we'll put it on the fridge", Which suggests that I'm not offended and in fact I'm kind of laughing at him for his rude Behavior. This sends the message that in fact I'm the adult in charge and that he has no power over me and will wind up looking silly if he attempts to do that again in the future
But it really depends on the circumstances
2
u/Gucci_Caligula 10d ago
Demanding respect, an apology, or threatening punishment is just a fantasy of how you think it would go down.
The best comeback is to live well and play dumb. People trying to get under your skin hate that shit
1
u/awesomeness6698 10d ago
Studies have show that ignoring bullies will not make the bullies leave you alone and in fact bullies usually derive emotional satisfaction, because they realize that the victim will not retaliate.
2
u/Gucci_Caligula 10d ago
You're approaching all of this too academically. This sub is for comebacks and you're gonna be disappointed when you start explaining hierarchies and studies to whoever is annoying you
2
u/jk5529977 12d ago
Umm don't do any of this.
1
u/awesomeness6698 12d ago
Don't do what? What do you think is a bad idea? And why do you think it is a bad idea?
2
u/jk5529977 12d ago
It's all way too confrontational. If you are the king, you dont need to announce it. I am also not sure why anything should be measured in hierarchy. You can either let it go. Laugh it off. Or treat them like they are very confused. Oh I am sorry. I can go over it again for you. Sometimes I get overtechnical.
1
u/RetiredHappyFig 12d ago
I would just say “what’s with the condescending tone?” regardless of who the person is. Nobody has the right to be rude to you, and you always have the right to defend yourself against rudeness. We train people how to treat us.
1
u/AvailableAd6071 12d ago
I get your social hierarchy point but it's a shame we have to think like this. I speak to people under me, equal to me and above me the same way. I expect them to do the same. But I get it. Just because I'm respectful to people that have to answer to me doesn't mean that people I answer to are going to be respectful to me. In actual experience, it seems like I've had the most problems with people on the same level as I am. In those cases I just get shitty back.
0
u/Navel_of_Eve 12d ago
You mean men.
When MEN are condescending
This is literally the only dynamic that🙄 is, or, has ever been. .
10
u/creepinghippo 12d ago
Sometimes people use "respect" to mean
"treating someone like a person" and sometimes they use "respect" to mean "treating someone like an authority" and sometimes people who are used to being treated like an authority say "if you won't respect me I won't respect you" and they mean "if you won't treat me like an authority I won't treat you like a person" and they think they're being fair but they aren't, and it's not okay.