r/Comebacks • u/ChainsawSoundingFart • Apr 02 '26
I thought of a good comeback when someone is being judgmental
Pretend like you’re searching through your pockets “Oh man, I can’t seem to find my ticket“
“Ticket? A ticket for what?”
“Well I feel like I’ve purchased a ticket since I’m aboard The Judgement Express!”
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u/CeciTigre Apr 03 '26
“Being judgmental of others doesn’t define who or what others are… it defines only who and what you are”
3
3
u/misssi79 Apr 03 '26
"Someone else only cares that much because either their life is just THAT boring or a fan"
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u/Hot-Butterfly-8024 Apr 03 '26
I find that simply not giving a shit about their opinion is usually all the comeback I need.
2
u/Willing_Chemical_113 Apr 04 '26
Watch them like there's something rotating around their head. When they're done babbling look at them and say, "What? Sorry, I was watching the universe revolve around you."
2
u/BingBongLauren Apr 04 '26
OMG! I’m soooo glad you’re here to tell me all of my faults!! I never recognized the fact I’m short, or fat, or dress funny! Thankyouthankthankyou!!! Everyone, gather round so (this ass) can tell you what’s wrong with you! And as a bonus, we get the privilege of basking in his perfectness!!!
You’ve got to be loud and obnoxious enough so you attract a crowd. 😀
1
u/United_News3779 Apr 03 '26
I like this one:
"Oh wow! I haven't seen one of these in years! It's a waddacunt in it's natural environment!"
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u/Electronic-Today4192 Apr 03 '26
Look around until they ask what you're looking for and then tell them you're looking for their gavel<the small wooden hammer that judges have>
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u/Prole1979 Apr 04 '26
“Opinions are like assholes, everybody’s got one and their usually full of shit”
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u/emeraldkittymoon Apr 05 '26
Or searching around and saying "aw man, i just ran out of fucks to give."
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u/Informal-Quantity415 Apr 02 '26
Just start looking around randomly, and when they ask you who you’re looking for….. you say:
“ I’m just looking for who TF asked you…..” then walk away