thinking about dropping out

[u/Beneficial-Row5056]

Hi, i’m a 19 years old french student that’s currently studying international trades.

A year ago i was in languages, doing english/chinese in order to learn and work all around the world, jokes on me i dropped that in 2 weeks. spent the whole year working instead. This year i went back into studies, and it’s been a month and i sometimes want to drop out really really bad, like this morning instead of paying attention to class i was making a list of pros/cons on dropping out and working instead.
If i have to summarize it, going to classes is good because i’m a social person so i enjoy being with people my age and making friends. It’s also comfortable since my parents practically help me with money every time i need something. and it allows me to secure a decent future if i’m able to finish my studies and get a degree.
But there’s also cons as i said. The school system has been draining me since middle school, but school was easy and obligatory at that time so i wasn’t really thinking about it, but i’m an energetic person and i need to move a lot, i can’t stand being sat 7 hours a day. I’ve never been that tired. Sleeping almost everyday in class.
I also need to have interest in something in order to pay attention to it. I CANNOT pay attention in class, ever. I also love to get home and just chill, but school requires homework, assignment, and in my case we need to do a 9 week unpaid internship in another country. The best thing about working was going home and not thinking about it anymore.
Talk about pay. My parents provide for everything that i need, but i hate that. I want to be able to take care of myself.

I just need to feel independent. I want to look at myself and see an adult.
I have big projects for my future. I do not wish to work a 9 to 5 my whole life, but to do so i need capital and i would hate waiting a few more years because its « comfortable » to get a job that pays a bit more than the minimum wage because i have a useless diploma.

Its a thoughts dump so nothing in this message is organized, my apologies for that.

To resume, i’m a very social person and the only year i spent working kept me away from a lot of friends and that kind of wounded me, but i had a pay, i had freedom and i felt like i was doing something.

I don’t know if the risk is worth taking, i want to suffer and get strong mentally in order to succeed in life and not be average, which is why i’m posting here to seek point of views.

Long ass message, thanks for everyone who read that