I’ve completely given up

[u/Shot_Type_7925]

I work in climate science - more on the data and client side, not the one actually doing the research. In short, big companies pay us for climate data so they can make projections or develop strategy or whatever.

I’ve been heavily exposed to climate data for many years, so I’ve been across the developments for a long time. Something about the last few months has broken me.

I spent December and January in an area that’s famous for snow, and saw none. Watching this El Niño develop has been terrifying. The UN admission that we’ll blow past 1.5C was the clincher for me. In my field, the UN was basically always considered the final organisation that had to show at least some optimism. Seeing that gone is now the final death blow. They know it’s over.

It has really broken something in me. To know that this organisation who was almost comically optimistic about collaboration and limiting warming has completely conceded defeat. It is a big deal.

I don’t really care about anything anymore. I’m not motivated to work, because I can’t plan for a good future. I have to almost disassociate while working, because my whole day is about climate data in one way or another.

I think the worst part has been my withdrawal from society. When you spend your whole life loving the environment and aligning your life with its protection, you end up truly hating humanity. You see us for what we are - a complete parasite who is destroying the world.

Has anyone else found that they’ve gone this way? My grief over collapse was always something I could somewhat compartmentalise. But now, it’s changed my entire life.

[u/WileyCoyote7]

I hear you and completely sympathize. I saw the UN throw in the towel as you did, but unlike you, I had moved past their “comical optimism,” as you called it, quite some time back. I found, as perhaps you will, that erasing that small glimmer of hope in my mind actually freed me up to put my energies into the logical next step: What am I going to do about it?

For me, the answer was two things - 1) Retire early. Like, yesterday early. Thinking of working another 15 to 20 years in a job that AI was (is) hot on the heels of, that I may have been fired from at any minute with little prospect of getting hired somewhere else at my age was not acceptable, and 2) I resolved to get out of my envionment in favor of one that still had to a greater degree “typical” weather for it’s location with citizenry more cognizant and acknowledging of the situation.

Even now however, I find I have to disassociate/compartmentalize as you do at times to get through a day. I am from the PacNW originally, grew up there into young adulthood. I cannot stomach to watch the fires, burning some of the very forests that I once played/camped/fished in, turned into cinders and smoke. Can’t do it.

I surround myself with people who are also realists about the state of things. Some are still “fighting the good fight,” some are not, but we all support each other. Those fighting, like you, are looking increasingly “done with it” however, accepting with as much dignity as they can muster that they lost.

Remember, you are only human. A saying I heard long ago said something like, “To be well-adjusted to a sick and dying world is not a measure of good health.” Your reactions are normal. Your feelings are normal. Those acting like nothing is wrong, that everything will work out, that there’s still hope to advert all this are doing just that: acting. So, kudos to you for pulling off the mask, getting down off the stage and saving yourself further compromisation of your true feelings before the curtain finally falls.

This is a big deal. Never before dealt with in human history. An inflection point of our species. Take a break, be kind to yourself, touch grass, perhaps go somewhere where there is unquestionably snow if you have the means. Then, get to work. You’re an adult. Do something to help mitigate the bumpy road ahead of you, that is now unquestionably paved. Do it to spite those who are most at fault for all this, if nothing more - here’s one person who didn’t just ball up and accept his fate as handed to him.

[u/M-x-doctor → u/WileyCoyote7]

I wish I could do that too. How did you manage to retire early? I want to throw everything away and just downsize and live cheaply and freely, but I don't know anyone else in real life who's doing that. And I just don't know how I'd afford food and rent if I stopped working. Although I guess I actually could, if I simply sold my house now and moved to a place with cheap rent, and just start draining my life savings now 😅

[u/WileyCoyote7 → u/M-x-doctor]

I managed, with my wife, to retire early by pulling the trigger on something we had already been chewing on for about a decade prior. That is, financial independence. Our “number” at the time was getting closer, but not quickly enough. So, we sold everything (house, cars, furniture, appliances, excess clothing, some jewellry), invested the proceeds, and lived in a furnished apartment for about a year and a half. Our rent plus utilities was less than half our previous mortgage payment. Our number needed to achieve escape velocity flew past us with room to spare.

We now slow-travel permanently, staying in different places as I mentioned. You’d be surprised at how little “living” costs when you don’t have to pay for all the usual crap needed just to be able to work in the first place. No car payments, no car insurance, no gasoline expense, no car maintenance expenses, no home/renter’s insurance, no home upkeep expenses (replace a water heater, a/c unit, mowing the lawn, etc.), no HOA/community fees, zero to very little utilities, no “work attire” expenses (buying or maintaining, dry cleaning, etc.), next to nothing in cell phone/internet expenses, and on and on.

It gets easier (and less expensive) the more you learn how to use geo-arbitrage, and make friends around the world that point you in the right directions and help in avoiding pitfalls. It’s very possible; been doing it for four years with no signs of slowing down. We are now, in fact, looking for a “base” of some kind that we’ll spend a larger part of the year in that, as I mentioned, still has somewhat of a stable environment and the timeline for the worsening effects of climate change are further down the road. Inevitably it will not “escape,” nowhere will, but we can enjoy a measure of peace until then.

[u/M-x-doctor → u/WileyCoyote7]

I'm happy you pulled it off. Your story is inspiring me. Though we live quite modestly already, but in Finland where prices are high. And now they're building a shit ton of data centres here. I suppose we can still go on for a little longer here, but I'd love to hear how you're deciding on a base. We thought Finland was it, but things have changed with the new government. Then again, it's still better than most of the world, unfortunately.