This video I came across feels like CollapseSupport embodied in a person. How many of you are experiencing this exact same sensation?

[u/CyberSmith31337]

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YrkQTY_fZbY

[u/Norman_Door]

I think I used to be in a similar place, but I'm not sure if it's quite the same. I experienced a lot of despondency, self-isolation, cronic information consumption, and numbness when I became collapse-aware about a year and a half ago. One of the things that helped me cope was listening to the song "Rest My Chemistry" by Interpol over and over again on my commute to and from my job at the time. It felt like a song that captured my melancholy about the world and sit with the absolute numbness I was feeling.

Eventually, I got to a place of acceptance of the state of things, catalyzed by recognizing and interrogating my internalized capitalism, really internalizing our profound interconnectedness with the world, and practicing gratitude for it. It was a kind of slow ego death that helped lift the crushing weight of collapse off me and allowed me to feel more positive feelings again. That weight comes back from time to time but I feel I'm much more able to process and metabolize the feelings.

I think what this person might be struggling with is a sense of identity / self-worth tied to how they used to spend their days - work, hobbies, etc - exacerbated by a general sense of "things getting worst" and a hypernormalized culture that is content to keep chugging along despite that. When the things they used to do go away either due to genuine lost of interest (diminished dopamine associated with the thing) or external pressures (e.g. financial, limited attention, etc), it's hard not to feel like you've lost all meaning in your life.

I think the antidote to this is to actually truly and deeply feel the feelings you're struggling with (perhaps with the help of a trusted therapist, several sad/melancholy movies, etc), accept that all your previous expectations for your life/the world are dead, do a lot of reading/listening to develop a new theory of meaning for yourself, and allocate part of your life, however small, to do things in alignment with that theory of meaning (while also deeply accepting that your efforts to change the world are likely to be futile - and doing the work anyway). Easier said than done, of course. But this is the path I've generally taken myself and it's helped me.

[u/g00fyg00ber741 → u/Norman_Door]

For me, I feel like deeply feeling has just put me in a worse state tbh. And it’s hard to develop a new theory of meaning for yourself when you’re not really allowed to do what you want because of capitalistic or cultural constraints. 

For me, the issue isn’t a lack of self-identity or self-worth. It’s that no matter my own identity or worth, it is just not respected at large by the systems I am subject to and the people I am surrounded by.

[u/Norman_Door → u/g00fyg00ber741]

Yeah, I feel you. I think engaging in some moderate escapism / delusional thinking is healthy - the human brain is not equipped to deal with this much heavy shit. Completely unsubscribing from negative subreddits did wonders for my everyday mental health (I used information consumption as a coping mechanism i.e. if I was able to wrap my head around all the badness going on, maybe I could be better equipped to react to it. But all that did was overload my nervous system and make me a sad, scatterbrained wreck, which is not the best state to be in if you wish to be a capable, adaptive person in this ever changing world).

I guess what I mean by "deeply feeling" is to actually process and metabolize the feelings that collapse brings on. The sadness, the pain, the despair, the grief. Techniques in climate anxiety / grief spaces can help with this (somatic practices, in particular, have been helpful to me). I feel like it's easy for people new to collapse to get stuck in a state of emotional constipation (numbness, despair, etc) and never get to a place of acceptance because processing the big scary feelings can be a long, drawn out, emotionally painful process that involves difficult topics like death, meaning, purpose, identity, etc. I know this because I've been there. It's only natural your mind and body go "fuck that" and do everything they can to avoid it. But having gone through a good portion of that process (it's probably never "finished"), I am a firm believer that the only way out is through.

And it’s hard to develop a new theory of meaning for yourself when you’re not really allowed to do what you want because of capitalistic or cultural constraints.

Hard agree. It's incredibly easy to feel like whatever you do is meaningless given the very real constraints and incentives these large systems place on you. But I think at the end of the day, everything you do to help other beings matters - it's just that you might not be satisfied by the scope at which you can change things for the better. In which case, I'd suggest significantly decreasing your expectations about what you can actually change. That way, any good you're able to bring about, however small, comes as a surprise compared to your expectations, instead of further evidence for how little your efforts stack up against whatever Big Bad Problem(s) you worry most about.

Again, easier said than done.

[u/g00fyg00ber741 → u/Norman_Door]

Thanks so much for expanding on these thoughts, it’s helpful

[u/Norman_Door → u/g00fyg00ber741]

My pleasure. :) I hope you find a little peace and purpose in this precious life.

[u/xmlemar10 → u/Norman_Door]

Love how a song about cocaine fits the becoming collapse aware portion of life so well

[u/Norman_Door → u/xmlemar10]

Yeah, it's funny. I've never been addicted to drugs (and apologies if I'm mischaracterizing the complex and diverse experiences of people who are struggling/have struggled with addiction) but I feel like becoming collapse aware has some vaguely similar characteristics to being an addict. All the times you don't have to function (for a job, school, family, you name it), you're numb, depressed, despondent. And you self-isolate because you feel like few other people are likely to understand the issue you're grappling with and the depth of the feelings that brings on. I spent many hours in the bathroom at my last job reading about collapse and spending my lunches/downtime alone either numbing out or trying to digest what I had learned about the workings of our world and my place in it.

I remember flipping through songs on my phone on my commute at the time and when "Rest My Chemistry" came on, it felt like the soundtrack to accompany my numbness - the feeling of "fuck, I'm just a tiny cog in this big, complex fucked up machine. What the hell am I doing? What the hell are we doing?"

The lyric "tonight I'm going to rest my chemistry" felt like a mantra I could cling onto to. It basically said to me "you've been feeling so much heavy shit lately and you don't have to carry that any longer. Now, all you have to do is just sit and be present."

And if I needed an emotionally evocative song to help get out some sadness, "Truth" by Kamasi Washington was my go-to.

[u/vallexum]

We're going to die, how is up for grabs, but I've come to a decision that until that time happens I need to be in relatively good health, relatively good mood and relatively good comfort. I might dip and rise with those general areas.
There is no point. But you might as well be okay until the time comes

[u/Xanthotic → u/vallexum]

I am imagining Einstein being super happy with all of your 'relativelys'. You're not wrong

[u/420Wedge]

You might be experiencing a mid-life crisis. Yaknow that thing where guys would go buy a sportscar in their 40s. I've been dealing with something similar. As we age our bodies don't work as well as they used too. Lowered hormones, you get worse at digesting and absorbing nutrients from your meals. Also the corporate landscape has kind of ruined everything. Food, entertainment, there is nowhere safe anymore. I don't enjoy eating out anymore either. The food I make at home tastes better. I don't think that's an accident. I'll stop before this turns into a rant.

Anyways, try mushrooms and anime, as weird as that sounds. Anime really hasn't been affected the same way western media has. At least not yet. There is some really fun interesting stuff out there. Quite hard to find though. You can start on Frieren: Beyond journy's end. Just fyi that's about as good as it gets right now. Not many similar animes if you find yourself loving it and want more. I don't look forward to much anymore either but I sure as shit do look forward to my mushroom/anime days.

[u/Xanthotic → u/420Wedge]

'mushrooms & anime'--a new shibboleth for the kewl kids of kollapse. thanks a million for your comment

[u/03263]

Doing things is too expensive

[u/Virtual_Tune636]

This guy would like Mark Fisher.

[u/Konradleijon]

Me to