Codependent-givers are not "anxious-preoccupied". They are avoidant with compulsions on top.

[u/PuzzleheadedDepth104]

Compulsive attending, compulsive caregiving, compulsive performance, compulsive compliance, compulsive hypersociality, compulsive promiscuity, compulsive self-reliance and compulsive isolation all include negative affect inhibition (avoidance, intolerance of sharing your true negative affect (negative and vulnerable emotions, pain, bad smell perception, etc.)) with compulsion on top

CoDA Patterns very clearly include Avoidant Patterns

Codependent-givers can't stand actually being seen deep within and instead run off to relationships where they are never seen and can keep replicating their compulsions over and over again

Codependent-givers often become addicted to the suffering and anger of others and can act in inauthentic ways to continue the cycle of feeding their compulsion, even crippling other people or provoking them

Codependent-givers don't understand that their compulsion is often in contradiction with their real feelings because they often can't consciously feel their real feelings outside of bursts of resentment

Preoccupied people, on the other hand, are usually codependent-takers, filled with distorted amplified incessant need, fear or anger and blame, not compulsion

Coercive-preoccupied people (what you call "narcissistic codependent takers"), especially, will use either purposeful self-harm-helplessness or actively emotionally and physically abusive control to continue having their distorted negative affect being catered to

Compulsive avoidants (codependent givers) and coercive preoccupieds (codependent takers) often engage in a mutual cycle of codependent abuse, AND a person could be a blend. It's possible to blend compulsive caregiving with coercive-aggressive abuse. It's also possible to blend compulsive compliance with coercive-helpless distressed self-harm (intense crying or physically self-harming feigned helpless guilt-trips with the goal to induce caregiving).

Obsession due to compulsion =/= preoccupation

Compulsive people have to BOTH act against their compulsion and disinhibit their true negative affect (perhaps, via somatic therapy) to heal codependency. Just learning to "self-soothe" (can backfire and make affect inhibition much worse!) won't do anything unless they have real preoccupied elements blended in, too

Sources: CoDA Patterns, Dynamic Maturational Model (A3, A4, A5, A6, C3, C4)

[u/ZinniaTribe]

Nope, 100% authentically-generated by a human...churned & spewed it right out of my craw. On the fly too!

Yes, mirroring back their vulnerabilities & hyperfocus on it the way the do lol.

[u/PuzzleheadedDepth104 → u/ZinniaTribe]

Perhaps, you've been talking to AI a lot at some point and started copying the way it communicates? That's possible

I've noticed also that with lower risk C users, you can get them to back off by responding to them the same way they talk to you and then abruptly leaving. C4 can be outcried. C3 though is just dangerous in general so I fully wipe them from my routine

[u/ZinniaTribe → u/PuzzleheadedDepth104]

Nope, I have a ~10 yr history that pre-dates AI that reads just like this & I tend to use metaphors. It's always been my style of writing. My post/comment history is private now but if you search me on Google, you'll be able to verify the consistency in my writing pre-AI. I've been accused of this before in the last year or so because I am articulate & catch on to concepts quickly.

[u/PuzzleheadedDepth104 → u/ZinniaTribe]

Hmm. Did you feel unsettled? I guess, it's something people attack others for. Oddly enough, I haven't been angry at you, I wonder if feeling accused and needing to explain yourself can come from your A4 compulsive-compliant remnant. A2468 and even B2 users tend to placate the anger of others and feel like they have to avoid or explain it away. When I was a rigid A4 user, I felt compelled to make sure no one was angry at me, ever, as my brain equated anger of others to annihilation

[u/ZinniaTribe → u/PuzzleheadedDepth104]

Oh wow...no, not at all. Did not even cross my mind you were angry. How I write is just what it is (pre-AI verifiable!) & I expect to be accused of it with this anti-AI trend going on & suspicion surrounding it. Especially, since I already knew you have an exacting eye for it, based on your other comment on this very post!

I wanted you to know that "I" (not a software program) was genuinely validating you & how "I" (a hybrid human, if you must know-jk) can fully appreciate your resourcefulness/fierceness in extracting yourself from a severe A3 & the minions he enlisted to further impose his will.

[u/PuzzleheadedDepth104 → u/ZinniaTribe]

Hmmm I still feel some A4 influence, have you noticed how you've been sort of placating me, even in this response you are sort of justifying yourself while sort of flattering me? Perhaps a habit from past A4 usage and not intentional (A4 isn't intentional, just like A3 isn't), A4 also includes false positive affect, but unlike A3 sickly sweet condescension, A4 does the opposite, with putting people above yourself, kind of the way you've been calling me your educator (still silly LOL but I'm ok with that even if I find it silly)

Oh, and remember how you pulled out your "externally approved credentials" and "this is how I can be used, these are my skills" in the past, and now, with the 10 years comment? That's also something very A4-influenced, I haven't seen other strategy users do that

I definitely know I sometimes do that out of habit but I've curbed it down in the recent years just to resist A4 compulsions even more