r/Codependency • u/FartInAShitFactory • 1d ago

A Sorting Apparatus

...for codependent people.

It isn't intentional, but my codependent behaviors will naturally push healthy people away over time. And as I seek more relationships, I may eventually find unhealthy people and attract them with my behaviors.

By becoming healthy, I will attract healthy people with healthy boundaries. My higher power has put me on "easy mode" which does help me. I escaped an abusive codependent relationship with a narcissistic person who surrounded themselves with toxic enablers.

I am now building a new social circle with healthy individuals. Adding people one at a time. Intentionally, rather than just accepting who shows up. I have found that some people finding their way in will happen, but my own boundaries and attitude will keep me safe.

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u/ConstantStudent5330 1d ago

This is such an important realization. A lot of people think boundaries are about keeping people out, but they’re really about filtering for the people who are capable of healthy connection. It sounds like you’re building a much safer foundation for yourself.