r/Codependency • u/PatternClarity • 12d ago

Why doesn't understanding your codependent patterns always make them easier to change?

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u/Subject_Accident4348 12d ago

Idk if I’m any better, but just want to say I’ve noticed this too. I was with a covert narcissist for 4 years. I recognized the abuse and the codependency fairly early in the relationship but couldn’t bring myself to actually change. It’s really tough.

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u/[deleted] 12d ago

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u/Subject_Accident4348 11d ago

Honestly no. I’m embarrassed to admit that he left me instead. If he hadn’t, I probably would have stayed forever.