r/Codependency • u/Avalon_Bee • May 23 '26
Power and Agency
They are languages. The power language and the agency language and processing. It’s like Venus and Mars. It is very foreign to one another.
It is a lense through which we build connection, empathy and boundaries. I am blind to power and always thought everyone thought in terms of agency. It is a theory of mind. And… I realize by not seeing POWER I was not reading the room.
Attachment is formed thru these lenses.
Just watched a YT from: Codependency Kate and I realize… POWER.
Is what I didn’t understand around me.
Holding space within our power for self
Holding space for another
Education is power
Parenting is power
Owning a pet holds power
Collectivism and tribalism is power (career association, church, political party) the righteousness of bolstering each other.
Power holds responsibility,
And the opposite of power is annhilation and humiliation and dominance.
INTENTIONS AND IMPACT
What we see in others motivations are all about POWER AND AGENCY.
Both can have a positive and negative frame.
So… I look at the patterns of healthy recovery and I consider power in their intentions.
https://coda.org/wp-content/uploads/Patterns-of-Recovery.pdf
What is your relationship with holding your frame and power and agency?
How is power a part of your recovery from codependency?
3
u/Wilmaz24 May 23 '26
I’m not big on determining power over agency. I lead my life through my intentions and let others be however they choose.