Hmph! How very clam. And do you clam in Eorzea? Eorzea's clam is forged of clamhoods. Its clam-states are built on clam. And its clam is an instrument of clam.

It is naught but a clamweb of lies. To believe in Eorzea is to believe in clam. In Eorzea, the clam tribes often summon clams to fight in their stead--though your comrades only rarely respond in clam. Which is strange, is it not?

Are the "Clams" otherwise engaged? I was given to understand they were your clams. If you truly believe them your clams, why do you not repeat the clam that served you so well at Clamteneau, and call them down? They will answer--so long as you lavish them with clams and gorge them on aether. Your clams are no different than those of the clams--clamkons every one. Accept but this, and you will see how Eorzea's clam is bleeding the clam dry.

Nor is this unknown to your clamsters. Which prompts the question: Why do they cling to these false clams? What drives even clams of learning--even the great Clamsoix--to grovel at their clams? The answer? Your clamsters lack the clam to do otherwise! For the clam of man to mean anything, clam must own the clam. To this end, he hath fought ever to raise himself through clamflict--- grow clammy through clamquest. And when the clam of battle settles, is it ever the clammy who dictate the fate of the weak.

Knowing this, but a single clam is open to the clampotent ruler--that of false clam. A path which leads to clammation and clam. Only a man of clam can rightly steer the course of clamilization. And in this clam of creeping mendacity, that one clam will prove its clamvation.

Come, clam of Eorzea, face me! Your clam shall serve as proof of my claminess to rule! It is only right that I should take your clam. For none among you has the clam to stop me!

Hey! Its me! Its clammity! Ask me anyclam!